I'm So Frustrated....

[Saint Therese]

I think it might be inappropriate to reveal details such as which congregation or community your are discerning with if that might put them in a bad light.

[AccountDeleted]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='21 October 2009 - 08:55 AM' timestamp='1256075701' post='1988598']
I'm still so frustrated! I riecved a letter today from the Novice Mistress at St. Scholastics. So much for the more understanding part. Apperently, they feel that my epilepsy would be difficult in an enclosed community. Like In His Love said, Gods will be done and I guess it has.
[/quote]

We always need to focus on what it is that God wants for us, because He knows better than we do what is for the good of our soul, not just our human desires. There are many people who have obstacles to religious life, not just medical or physical ones like epilepsy, but also bipolar, schizophrenia, disabilities like blindness or deafness, or even that really simple one like -- age! What we need to do is to be open to what God is trying to show us at every step along the way.

Do you have a spiritual director? Are the two of you working on this together? Sometimes we think that we can storm the gates of heaven by our efforts, but God wants humility and trust from us as well, and no matter how hard we try, without a childlike faith and trust, all our efforts will come to nothing.

The most important effort you can make right now is prayer, lots of it, and if possible, a lot of time in front of the Blessed Sacrament. This is the foundation of any vocation, because a deep and rich prayer life is the way our relationship with our Beloved grows. Without the personal relationship... well, you get the picture I am sure.

All He wants is your love. He will give all else to you in His time, according to His will. Trust in how very much He loves you.

Prayers for you

[trustandgratitude]

[quote name='Saint Therese' date='20 October 2009 - 07:27 PM' timestamp='1256081267' post='1988672']
I think it might be inappropriate to reveal details such as which congregation or community your are discerning with if that might put them in a bad light.
[/quote]

You are absolutly right and I apoligize I didn't mean to put anyone in a bad light. I'm not angry just disapointed. I feel very drawn to the Benedictine life and had high hopes after much disapointment but as someone else on this board mention I will have to think out side of the box.

Gods ways are truely His own and as soon as we think we have a leg up He shows us how much we have to go.

[trustandgratitude]

I need some help, agian. I really hate turning to cyber space for help but I guess you go where you think people will understand. First, let me say yes I have a spiritual director but I just switched directors and am still getting to know this one. He is also on vacation for the next 3 weeks so i am on a limb. That being said.... I have stuggled with spiritual dryness over the past year to varying degrees. Well for the past 4 or 5 weeks it have gotten worse and I am at a loss of what to do. There are boubts and temptations of all kinds but mostly agianst faith and hope; I have been fighting agianst them and I have even tried welcoming them and offering my poverty to Jesus but they persist. I feel so overwelmed and Jesus seems so far away now. It would be so easy to stop going to daily Mass To stop sitting in adoration. I have been reading some books that were recommeded and have found some comfort in that but it seems very little in the face of such temptation. I am sure some of you, if not all, have been in this situation can you please help? Thank you in advance.

[Saint Therese]

I would recommend talking to your pastor.

[HisChild]

Spiritual dryness is so difficult. I've been there many times myself.

A very wise person once said that it is during this dry time that our Lord wants to see if we are in love with the God of Consolations... or the Consolations of God.

It is at this point where our faithfulness is really necessary.

It doesn't help when we are feeling dry, but there it is. It's also at this time where the evil one really tries to weasel in on those doubts and tries to convince us that we've been abandoned. All I can do is tell you to continue to pray and if it's the God of Consolations you love, He will reveal Himself in His time.

I'll pray for you.

In Christ,

HisChild

[organwerke]

I don't know very well how to help you.
I have experienced too, but sincerely I thought it was something more like depression than spiritual dryness...but actually, it is difficult to distunguish since they are similar in their aspects, in those persons who have the faith of course.
I am really sorry for you, and I have to say that in these moments speaking to the spiritual director too is often very difficult and don't give any consolations!
Anyway, the very important thing is that you ask and accept every kind of help that you can receive from the others, especially from those persons who can give you friendship and comprehension. I would also say that even if you can't feel God He is really near to you, and always loves you with infinite love!
I will pray for you.