I'm So Frustrated....

[osapientia]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='15 October 2009 - 10:43 AM' timestamp='1255614231' post='1985809']
Thank you, John. It is funny that you should mention them I just sent a letter to them as their website is down. I feel very drawn to the Benedictines, Latin and Gregorian and plus in my book. Abott Justin, from Covington LA, whom I just met also suggested them as an option. I hope to hear from them but I have also found that there is a difference in acceptablity between mens communities and womans, women seem to think thier life is harder or something.
I thank everyone for thier encouragement, it is so hard not to become discoraged after so many obstacles.
[/quote]

I know the Petersham communities very well and I personally know the brother to whom genesisweaver is referring. One of the most lovely (although difficult in some degree of course) things I've ever seen is the way the monks care for this dear brother before, during and after his seizures. No one, of course, can speak for any community but their experience with and love for this brother (which applies to the nuns as well as the monks) just might make them more open to the possibility of having you with them. They are lovely and hands down my absolute favorite communities (for very good reason, I assure you <smile>).

I had the privilege of becoming acquainted with Superior of The Sisters of Jesus Crucified a number of years ago, although their name does not reveal it, they are Benedictine - in fact the Petersham community (the nuns I believe) were instrumental in them becoming affiliated with the international Subiaco Congreation of Benedictines. This is also a very lovely community.

God bless and keep you always.

Peace,
osap

[Starets]

Yes, definitely talk with the superior of St. Scholastica's in Petersham. I visited st. mary's, their sister community (brtother community?) before coming here to Christ in the Desert. We have a new Postulant whoi is epileptic so I know it can be done. I had a similar problem when I was blind. Keep persevering

[slisa]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='14 October 2009 - 01:54 PM' timestamp='1255542869' post='1985195']
I have been discering a religious vocatio for a few years and over that time I have become more and more convinced that my call is to give myself completely to Jesus in the contemplative life. Last year I was diagnosed or rather rediagnosed with epilepsy that is now under control with medication. My siezures are "partial" and "complex partial" meaning the are minor brief staring spells. When I mention epilepsy to any community I emmediately get a door slammed in my face, gently but slammed. I have prayed that God would remove this desire from my heart but it still remains. Can anyone suggest any thing to do or say when approaching communitys? This seems like such a minor thing to me and to most everyone I know. Does anyone know of any order off hand that might be open to this "cross" that I have been given? I have learned alot over this past year and one thing that I can and will be working on for the reat of my life is surrender.
[/quote]

The Olivetan Benedictines would probably consider you, but they are monastic with an active apostolate. You may want to check out their website at olivben.org. Blessings on your search.

[trustandgratitude]

[quote name='InHisLove726' date='14 October 2009 - 02:30 PM' timestamp='1255545026' post='1985226']
Please forgive me if I'm mistaken, but you are a woman, are you not?

Have you thought about looking into Visitation orders? Generally, most of the Visitation orders are more accepting of physical orders, as long as you are mentally healthy. There are no rigorous penances, and it's a contemplative vocation. If you are interested, I can post some links to some websites of orders in the United States.


Otherwise, I know this must seem like such a difficult cross to bear, especially when it seems all the doors are being closed on you for a reason that you cannot control beyond medication. But you must consider that God put this desire into your heart for a good reason! As long as you are seeking out religious life with good intentions and are not trying to run away from anything, He understands and appreciates that you desire to serve Him. May I suggest that you read a book I am reading now, called, "I Believe In Love." This book was recommended to me when I was going through a very difficult time, and I have just now started reading it. It's incredible. One of the most important lessons I've learned from it is that God does not count our successes or failures. He appreciates the sincere effort given. When He judges us at the end of our life, love is what matters most.

I think it would be a great idea for you to take a silent retreat. Maybe you might consider a "Desert Experience" retreat with the Visitation Nuns in Mobile, AL?

http://www.visitationmonasterymobile.org/HTMLcode/Desert.htm

It might help to get your bearings and re-evaluate why and how you are discerning. I'll be praying for you! God bless.
[/quote]


In His Love, I have not really explored the Visitation order much but I did contact the Monasteery in Virginia and there response was less then excepting. They also told me they would not accet anyone with epilepsy. I have sent an email to the monastery in Mass. but I am still waiting on a reply and I am a little concerned that I may not have the right address since the only one on there website is for general information. Thank you for the link to the Mobile monastery and the suggestion of a retreat. Mobile is really not that far from here. I would appeciate the links.

[osapientia]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='16 October 2009 - 03:49 PM' timestamp='1255718994' post='1986538']
In His Love, I have not really explored the Visitation order much but I did contact the Monasteery in Virginia and there response was less then excepting. They also told me they would not accet anyone with epilepsy. I have sent an email to the monastery in Mass. but I am still waiting on a reply and I am a little concerned that I may not have the right address since the only one on there website is for general information. Thank you for the link to the Mobile monastery and the suggestion of a retreat. Mobile is really not that far from here. I would appeciate the links.
[/quote]


Since St. Scholastica's web site is down they might not have gotten your email. Would you consider writing to them snail mail? I had an email from the Prioress last night and I told them the site is down, they didn't even know it. They had scheduled getting some help to update it next week...it's possible that the person who is helping them took it down to work on it.

You can snail mail them at: St. Scholastica Priory, Vocation Director, 274 North Main Street, Petersham, MA 01366. In the meantime, I'll say a prayer for you.

Pax,
Osap

[trustandgratitude]

[quote name='osapientia' date='16 October 2009 - 07:48 PM' timestamp='1255736902' post='1986611']
Since St. Scholastica's web site is down they might not have gotten your email. Would you consider writing to them snail mail? I had an email from the Prioress last night and I told them the site is down, they didn't even know it. They had scheduled getting some help to update it next week...it's possible that the person who is helping them took it down to work on it.

You can snail mail them at: St. Scholastica Priory, Vocation Director, 274 North Main Street, Petersham, MA 01366. In the meantime, I'll say a prayer for you.

Pax,
Osap
[/quote]


Are you sure about that St. address? I did send them a letter by mail but the address I found was 271 N. Main St. I sent it last Tuesday, I can always sent it agian. Thanks for tell the Prioress about the website. Since you are in contact with her would you give her my email address? It's lisa1207@aol.com. I just checked the web site today and it is still down.

In regaurds to what I said in my last post I was referring to the Visitation monastery that Tyringham, MA.

[osapientia]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='17 October 2009 - 11:44 AM' timestamp='1255790663' post='1986938']
Are you sure about that St. address? I did send them a letter by mail but the address I found was 271 N. Main St. I sent it last Tuesday, I can always sent it agian. Thanks for tell the Prioress about the website. Since you are in contact with her would you give her my email address? It's lisa1207@aol.com. I just checked the web site today and it is still down.

In regaurds to what I said in my last post I was referring to the Visitation monastery that Tyringham, MA.
[/quote]

OOOPsss....TYPO on the address. Let me think about the email address request...I'm not sure it's the way to go. Too "third party" if you know what I mean. I KNOW, KNOW KNOW it is hard to be patient...you could call them to see if they have received your letter.

[trustandgratitude]

[quote name='osapientia' date='17 October 2009 - 12:34 PM' timestamp='1255797251' post='1986970']
OOOPsss....TYPO on the address. Let me think about the email address request...I'm not sure it's the way to go. Too "third party" if you know what I mean. I KNOW, KNOW KNOW it is hard to be patient...you could call them to see if they have received your letter.
[/quote]


Osap,

You are RIGHT it is so hard to be patient. You are also right about the email address so please don't pass it on. Please pray for an increase in patients.

[moon_child_anne]

I know that you said that you're considering a contemplative order, but keep in mind that apostolic communities are also contemplative in their own way.

I'm a postulant with the Sisters of Notre Dame www.snd1.org and live with a Sister who has epilepsy that is controlled by medications.

Let me know if she can answer any of your questions. I'd be glad to ask her.

Anne, PND

[osapientia]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='17 October 2009 - 02:15 PM' timestamp='1255799729' post='1986983']
Osap,

You are RIGHT it is so hard to be patient. You are also right about the email address so please don't pass it on. Please pray for an increase in patients.
[/quote]

Just received from Mother Prioress at Petersham......praying for patience.

PS. We have a problem with our website – it is being worked on. Our address is held hostage by internet bandits! What a crazy world. Someone is working on it.

[trustandgratitude]

[quote name='osapientia' date='18 October 2009 - 09:44 AM' timestamp='1255873470' post='1987286']
Just received from Mother Prioress at Petersham......praying for patience.

PS. We have a problem with our website – it is being worked on. Our address is held hostage by internet bandits! What a crazy world. Someone is working on it.
[/quote]

Thanks for the update. Mother Prioress should have recieved my letter but not but I just realized I forgot to include my email address in it so I will either have to wait (more waiting) to hear by mail or phone.
I also sent of a letter to the Visitation monastery in Tyringham since I never heard back from my email.

So we wait, in patience.

[InHisLove726]

Prayers that God's will be done.

[osapientia]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='20 October 2009 - 02:54 PM' timestamp='1256061273' post='1988483']
Thanks for the update. Mother Prioress should have recieved my letter but not but I just realized I forgot to include my email address in it so I will either have to wait (more waiting) to hear by mail or phone.
I also sent of a letter to the Visitation monastery in Tyringham since I never heard back from my email.

So we wait, in patience.
[/quote]
Just so you know, Mother Prioress is leaving on Oct 21st and won't be back home until Nov 2nd. More waiting, I know. You could call them tomorrow during the day and at least ask if your letter was received....it's up to you, but I do know they WILL get back to you....you just may have to wait a while. Yikes...I know that is hard.

[trustandgratitude]

I'm still so frustrated! I riecved a letter today from the Novice Mistress at St. Scholastics. So much for the more understanding part. Apperently, they feel that my epilepsy would be difficult in an enclosed community. Like In His Love said, Gods will be done and I guess it has.

[InHisLove726]

[quote name='trustandgratitude' date='20 October 2009 - 05:55 PM' timestamp='1256075701' post='1988598']
I'm still so frustrated! I riecved a letter today from the Novice Mistress at St. Scholastics. So much for the more understanding part. Apperently, they feel that my epilepsy would be difficult in an enclosed community. Like In His Love said, Gods will be done and I guess it has.
[/quote]

I have felt the same pain you are experiencing right now. It's so difficult to hear that we are not understood, but I learned that each denial is one step closer to acceptance. God has a plan for you, and you cannot see it yet, but it's so beautiful. Put your arms around Him and let Him carry you through this trial. You will find the place you were meant to be all along soon enough, and when you find it, you will think to yourself, "Why was I worrying?"

You have not yet heard back from Tyringham Visitation, and I would encourage you to write others as well. Let me know if you need help finding addresses.

I'm praying for you.

Edited October 20, 2009 by InHisLove726