Writing Carmelite Communities

[InHisLove726]

I have sent out letters today to a sorted few of the Carmelite monasteries that I am interested in learning about. They are:

[url="http://www.carmelsanantonio.org/"]San Antonio, TX[/url]
[url="http://www.carmelitesofrochester.org/"]Pittsford, NY (Rochester)[/url]
[url="http://www.rc.net/detroit/carmelite/"]Clinton Township, MI[/url]
[url="http://www.carmelitenunsstjoseph.org/Buffalo.htm"]Buffalo, NY[/url]
[url="http://www.holynamecarmel.org/"]Denmark, WI[/url]
[url="http://www.myvocationislove.ca/"]Zephyr, Ontario in Canada[/url]

I decided to send all of them snail mail because I think that's a better way of communicating. I can't wait to hear back from any of them!

[Deus te Amat]

That is so awesome, IHL!!! I am so happy for you! I know that if I were you, I'd be anxiously checking the mail box every day until I got a reply. And that includes tomorrow.


Please be sure to update this thread when you hear back.

[InHisLove726]

[quote name='Deus_te_Amat' post='1941419' date='Aug 5 2009, 08:42 PM']That is so awesome, IHL!!! I am so happy for you! I know that if I were you, I'd be anxiously checking the mail box every day until I got a reply. And that includes tomorrow.


Please be sure to update this thread when you hear back. [/quote]

LOL, I am already hyper from excitement! I doubt I'll hear back from them tomorrow unless the USPS and the nuns have developed superhuman speed!

I will definitely let you all know how it goes. I want to thank you all so much for your prayerful support these last few months, especially when everything was unclear to me and I kept flip-flopping back and forth between Carmelites and the other orders.

I hope that I am able to get a job soon (prayers please!) and I can start visiting a few Carmelite orders.

[Laudem Gloriae]

Don't be surprised if you have to write more than once to the same Carmel (or other) because you don't get an answer! Don't be discouraged, wait a few wks or more and then write again.

I have had many orders not write after waiting for a month or more and then a letter shows up a long time later! Often with things like they had been painting the prioresses' office and things got lost, had your letter but lost your envelope that had your address on it, got misplaced, the prioress was ill (or novice mistress or vocation mistress), a flu was going around and many sisters were sick, etc. These have been ALL explanations that I have got and that's fine as I don't expect them to be sitting at the computer or mail box waiting for MY letter! I'd rather they be at prayer, work, teaching the novices, etc. instead of internet surfing, blogging, wasting time on the internet!

There are a few Carmels I wrote to in this country 2-3 times and NEVER got an answer back - email AND snail mail. Why? I don't know so I just chalk it up as God saying "NO, I don't want you there!" Maybe my letter got there - but 2-3 times??

So don't be upset if that happens to you. But if your are at least under 35, you should be ok. I was told once that some orders don't answer hoping you'll go away after not hearing a response back as they don't want to hurt your feelings if you are not right for them - too old, etc. Whether that is true I don't know. But I do know many women I've talked to about this have all had the experience of getting NO responses occasionally.

If you feel comfortable calling them if no answer, do so. But generally, I found almost all orders answer the 1st time and the ones that took a 2nd time were due to some occurrence (like mentioned above) and just a few never did.

[RosaMystica]

I've been to the Carmel in Clinton Twp., MI several times and it's very, very beautiful. They have a young novice right now that i went to college with. The nuns there are vibrant and full of life and their Mother Superior is just amazing. I've spoken to her twice and she is very wise and also has an interesting vocation story .

[InHisLove726]

[quote name='Laudem Gloriae' post='1941429' date='Aug 5 2009, 09:04 PM']Don't be surprised if you have to write more than once to the same Carmel (or other) because you don't get an answer! Don't be discouraged, wait a few wks or more and then write again.

I have had many orders not write after waiting for a month or more and then a letter shows up a long time later! Often with things like they had been painting the prioresses' office and things got lost, had your letter but lost your envelope that had your address on it, got misplaced, the prioress was ill (or novice mistress or vocation mistress), a flu was going around and many sisters were sick, etc. These have been ALL explanations that I have got and that's fine as I don't expect them to be sitting at the computer or mail box waiting for MY letter! I'd rather they be at prayer, work, teaching the novices, etc. instead of internet surfing, blogging, wasting time on the internet!

There are a few Carmels I wrote to in this country 2-3 times and NEVER got an answer back - email AND snail mail. Why? I don't know so I just chalk it up as God saying "NO, I don't want you there!" Maybe my letter got there - but 2-3 times??

So don't be upset if that happens to you. But if your are at least under 35, you should be ok. I was told once that some orders don't answer hoping you'll go away after not hearing a response back as they don't want to hurt your feelings if you are not right for them - too old, etc. Whether that is true I don't know. But I do know many women I've talked to about this have all had the experience of getting NO responses occasionally.

If you feel comfortable calling them if no answer, do so. But generally, I found almost all orders answer the 1st time and the ones that took a 2nd time were due to some occurrence (like mentioned above) and just a few never did.[/quote]

I think I'll avoid the "lost envelope, lost address" excuse because I put my address and telephone number on the letter itself. I expect not to hear back from them for a while (though I would like it to be soon ) because, when I wrote Arlington, TX the first time, I didn't hear from them for 2 months and Terre Haute, IN was about 3 months. Mother Maria (Arlington) really did not give any excuses. She just sent me a packet of information and a letter to say thank you for my letter. Sr. Mary Helen (Terre Haute) said she was gone from the computer for a while due to having been on retreat and for Lent (it was last year around Easter).

If I had to only get responses from 1 or 2 of the orders I sent letters to, I hope it is from either Buffalo, Rochester, or Zephyr. They are the ones I have the most interest in.

I actually wrote Clinton Township last year by email, but I was very immature then, so I decided to write them again to see what they say. I am not holding out for them, though.

[RosaMystica]

[quote name='Laudem Gloriae' post='1941429' date='Aug 5 2009, 10:04 PM']Don't be surprised if you have to write more than once to the same Carmel (or other) because you don't get an answer! Don't be discouraged, wait a few wks or more and then write again.[/quote]

This reminds me.. a couple years ago I wrote to the Byzantine Carmel in Sugarloaf, PA and I had forgotten that I had written them. Well, I did get a response from them but it was almost a year later. I thought it was a little funny but at least they wrote back I guess .

One last thing! I really suggest the Carmel in Ada Parnell, MI. I e-mailed their prioress one time and she was so friendly and helpful. Their Carmel looks so beautiful, too.

[InHisLove726]

[quote name='MandyKhatoon' post='1941442' date='Aug 5 2009, 09:21 PM']This reminds me.. a couple years ago I wrote to the Byzantine Carmel in Sugarloaf, PA and I had forgotten that I had written them. Well, I did get a response from them but it was almost a year later. I thought it was a little funny but at least they wrote back I guess .

One last thing! I really suggest the Carmel in Ada Parnell, MI. I e-mailed their prioress one time and she was so friendly and helpful. Their Carmel looks so beautiful, too. [/quote]

I just recently dug up Ada's website. I think I will print out a letter for them. I really admire their website and the life looks brilliant to me and SO CARMELITE!

Speaking of which, when I was at the USPS office today, I was using the automated machine and bought some stamps. I wanted to buy just one book, but I was too quick and without looking at which selection I was making, I bought 2 books of stamps! I think I have enough stamps for the rest of the year! I think I'll use most of them on correspondence to Carmelite communities.

[elizabeth09]

JMJ

[HisChild]

How exciting! Tell me what you think when you hear back from Zephyr. How wild, I was just viewing their website last night.

I love all things Carmelite.

When I wrote to one Carmelite Monastery a few years ago, I so wanted to enter there. I'd made a visit and loved it!

I wrote a letter asking to continue the inquiry (ie visit or start my admission paperwork). I didn't hear anything... and didn't hear anything... and didn't hear anything. Finally I was accepted else where (which if you've been on here a while, know I left d/t getting sick). As I was preparing my business, selling my house, etc. the Carmelites finally wrote back saying they wanted me to come for an extended visit! It never happened, sadly.

Anyway, I'm just adding my two cents that sometimes it takes a while. A long time ago, I used to be a restaurant manager. One thing I taught my servers was that if someone came in to eat by themselves, they're just sitting there waiting for you to help them. A couple or more than two people chat with each other. Solo guests don't. So 5 minutes to them seem like hours. That's what it's also like when you're writing to communities. For YOU it seems like you wrote them last year! When in fact, it's only been 2 weeks.

Good luck and God bless!

[Marie-Therese]

[quote name='MandyKhatoon' post='1941440' date='Aug 5 2009, 09:16 PM']I've been to the Carmel in Clinton Twp., MI several times and it's very, very beautiful. They have a young novice right now that i went to college with. The nuns there are vibrant and full of life and their Mother Superior is just amazing. I've spoken to her twice and she is very wise and also has an interesting vocation story .[/quote]




Mother Mary Elizabeth is the prioress of the Clinton Tshp. Carmel, and she is beautiful. I correspond with her and consider her a friend. She is amazingly wise! Definitely write to them. They have a lovely community. Mother is also very email savvy so if you preferred to contact them via email you might get a quicker reply...but since I am nowhere near the stage of communicating with any communities, I don't know if that is some breach of etiquette. LOL However, if you were to ask me right now which communities I would be serious about, I would list 2, and Clinton Tshp. is one of those 2. Just my 2 cents.

[InHisLove726]

[quote name='Marie-Therese' post='1941720' date='Aug 6 2009, 01:55 AM']

Mother Mary Elizabeth is the prioress of the Clinton Tshp. Carmel, and she is beautiful. I correspond with her and consider her a friend. She is amazingly wise! Definitely write to them. They have a lovely community. Mother is also very email savvy so if you preferred to contact them via email you might get a quicker reply...but since I am nowhere near the stage of communicating with any communities, I don't know if that is some breach of etiquette. LOL However, if you were to ask me right now which communities I would be serious about, I would list 2, and Clinton Tshp. is one of those 2. Just my 2 cents. [/quote]

I actually consider her to be very wise as well. In honesty, she dismissed me in a very eloquent way when I emailed her the first time. I told her I was very interested in her community, so she wrote back and asked me to explain my vocation story. I think it was around March 2008 when I first wrote them (or close), so I'd just learned about my possible vocation, and even more recently, my possible vocation to the Carmelites. I really didn't know what to say. I tried to explain it the best I could, but it was all about how I loved St. Therese and how Carmel appeared to be a wonderful place. She wrote back to me and said that she shared what I wrote to the Novice Mistress, and she was sorry but they both agreed that I appeared to have an attraction but not a genuine vocation to Carmel. At the time, I was both angry and hurt that I could receive such a response when I hadn't met them in person. I mean, how could they know?

I evidently had a lot of growing up to do, not only spiritually but emotionally as well. If I had been asked to describe why I want to be a Carmelite, it would not be all about St. Therese and why Carmel is so beautiful. It would be about why I want to be there, and what I feel my mission is.

If you had asked me back then what I thought of Clinton Township's Carmel, I would have said that the Mother Prioress didn't know what she was talking about. If you ask me now, I would say she is the most intelligent, gentle person I know. I believe perception is all about our attitude. I was VERY immature then, not only in my vocation, but in my personality as well.

I've decided to give them another chance. We'll see what becomes of it. Now that I know how a Prioress discerns, I know it's all about prayer and not because she doesn't like the story. She prays to God for the decision. I know God is the only one who can say "yes" or "no." I trust whatever answer I receive from her will be the best one, even if I don't understand it.

Edited August 6, 2009 by InHisLove726

[InHisLove726]

If anyone is interested in the letter that I wrote to the communities:
[quote]+JMJT+

Dearest Carmelite Sisters,

Praised be Jesus Christ! I pray that this letter reaches you in good health and spirit. I desire to learn more about your Carmelite community. Through the intercession and guidance of St. Therese of Lisieux, I believe very deeply that I am called to pursue a cloistered Carmelite vocation. I took particular interest in your website after searching for an order to contact and discern with.

I’ll give you just a little background on my vocation thus far. I had an interior reversion to the Church in December 2007 after a period of not practicing the faith. I received all the Sacraments of Initiation in the Church, but, at the time, I was mainly just going along with the flow. I attended a retreat in Advent 2007 hosted by the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal where I met the first religious order I had ever encountered. Not only were the Friars there, but the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal and the Sisters of Life. It was such a witness to the faith and I felt called back to the Church through what I witnessed and experienced personally.

When I returned home, I felt a conviction to pursue religious life, whatever the cost. I first started looking at active/contemplative orders and discerned a short time with both the Sisters of Life and the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal. However, a movie I watched forever transformed my life—it was the movie about St. Therese of Lisieux. Never before had I experienced such a joy and peace as I did when I learned about Carmel through her and, after watching the movie, I read “Story of a Soul” and I could feel St. Therese drawing me ever closer to the Carmelite order.

I first started out looking at cloistered Carmelite orders and I was in contact with several of them, but there was a fear within me that I could not live the life. I learned, through a friend, about the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus, and discovered that they were able to make home visits and work within the community. Feeling as though this would be the best option for me and still give me the opportunity to go home occasionally, I pursued two retreats with the order and even applied for entrance. However, it was a live-in that showed me how wrong my decision was. I did not desire the active life of a Carmelite religious. I knew almost immediately that God was calling me somewhere else. My heart was drawn in to the contemplative lifestyle, and I enjoyed prayer with the Sisters. God was increasing in me a desire to forget myself and become totally hidden in His Sacred Heart.

It was not an easy decision to make, but I informed the Superior of my wish to return home early. My request was granted, and, with much sadness, I packed my things and left. While my heart knew where God was calling me, I wasn’t quite ready to embrace the idea of living a solitary life for Jesus in the cloister, and so I pursued other channels of active/contemplative life and discerned outside the Carmelites. It was through the intercession of St. Therese and the Blessed Virgin Mary’s loving guidance that I was drawn back to Carmel. They showed me how a life lived for God alone was God’s call in my life and I came to understand that the cloistered life of Carmel was the only life that would give me total peace and utter joy. I have embraced the calling completely and I have no other desire but to die to myself and become transformed in the Most Sacred Heart of Jesus.

It is with great confidence in the Divine Heart that I write this letter to you, asking for information about your order. I wish to begin the first steps of discernment by building up a solid relationship, and, if you will permit me, a visit when God allows it. I am unemployed at the moment, so I will be unable to visit until later this year when I can save up some money. I am confident that God will provide in His time.

May God bless you and give you His peace, Sisters. Thank you for taking the time to read my letter. I wait patiently to hear from you!


In Jesus, through Mary,

Name excluded for privacy [/quote]

[RosaMystica]

[quote name='InHisLove726' post='1941740' date='Aug 6 2009, 03:21 AM']If anyone is interested in the letter that I wrote to the communities:[/quote]
I liked how open and honest you were in your letter! Very nice!

[InHisLove726]

[quote name='MandyKhatoon' post='1942227' date='Aug 6 2009, 05:02 PM']I liked how open and honest you were in your letter! Very nice! [/quote]

That's exactly what I was aiming for. The only thing that I left out in the letter was about my history with depression and anxiety, but I prefer to tell the Superiors about that in person. Both my spiritual director and a Prioress I was in contact with told me to be truthful, but to do it in person.