Back From My Visit To Sheffield Carmel In The Uk

[Laudem Gloriae]

Well, I returned from the Kirk Edge (Sheffield) Carmel in the UK yesterday. It was beyond beautiful! Never have I seen nor heard of a more traditional, true, authentic Carmel strictly following the 90's Constitutions and Holy Mother St. Teresa's Rule! Though they are strict and austere, the joy and peace of the sisters are palpable and incredible! The love between them and towards myself was overwhelming!

They just love Sr. Michael Maria (Annie/nunsense) to death! She asked me to tell you all that she brings you all (and your intentions, vocation searches and problems with debt, financing nun/sister runs or brother/monk/priest runs before God in prayer every day.

Below is some information on them for anyone interested in Sheffield for a vocational interest. I do have much more on them from someone who entered but didn't have a Carmel vocation and wrote of her stay there. This I can send anyone interested by email as an attachment. They talked to me so much about their life - I was so entranced! And loved it all! There wasn't ANY part that I thought "Oh I won't like that or this"!

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When Mother Mary first came to the parlor, she kneeled down on a prayer stool! They have no chairs in the parlor just a prayer stool or one of those little wooden stools Carmels have with the slot in the top to carry it - or to kneel on the floor. The silence was incredible! As they are on the edge of the moors and inside the national park/reserve area, there can never be any building near or around them. Even outside there was no noise. There was an occasional car sound driving by - barely noisy at all that I heard at the Lodge where I stayed that is right near the road but even then, the silence and beauty of the surrounding land was breath taking! You could hear the wind blowing at times while in the chapel when the wind was really gusting - for me as I was not allowed inside the monastery of course.

The nuns wear the same habit of St. Therese with white part (forget what Annie called it) showing on the shoulders - same habit all round as St. Therese - which I love! This Carmel has ALL that I wanted in a Carmel and hadn't found! Even down to the habit! Philly was nice but they wear the veil tucked into the scapular in the back and has no white on the shoulders from that head piece.

These nuns make their own and wear the same shoes that St. T of Avila wears! The alparagates (spelling?)! Of course if a sister has bad feet, foot problems or flat feet, they are allowed to wear sandals or even shoes. Though they are strict and austere they aren't foolish - Mother Mary said even St. Teresa of Avila made concessions for a sister when needed. To ruin a sister's health just to stick to rule & constitutions was not right nor what the Holy Mother wanted.

ALL the sisters are incredibly loving, warm, funny, open and were so overwhelmed with excitement that I could finally come! I told Mother that they were the only sisters I had EVER met who I loved and felt they WERE my sisters and my Mother or my Aunts or something! It was like old home week instead of a stranger (me) meeting strange nuns (them)! Mother said the same and said she had never felt more at home with someone!

They have double grilles in the chapel and in the 3 parlors and then thick wooden doors closing them off on their side. Their choir grille facing into the chapel is a big grille and has 2 sets of doors (wooden) on it and the way they are situated the public can't see them at all and they can only be heard. They have a small communion door that opens for communion for the sisters. When they come for communion they can be see a little bit as the squares of the grille are small and close together. They opened the chapel doors for me while I was there (they are closed always when there is no vocational visitor like myself there) as otherwise it is hard to hear them recite the office. Otherwise these doors are closed but like I said even open it is impossible to see them and hard to see them in the speaking parlors! The first outer grilles in the 3 parlors are small squares and close together and the second set of grilles are vertical bars pretty close together. I hadn't seen such grilles before! I have seen double grilles but these are different. But I love them!

They have a few younger sisters - one late 20s and the early mid 30's and then older. One younger one is from China and an older one is from Scotland with a heavy Scottish burr! She was so sweet saying "wee" this and "wee" that!

These Carmelites have the solitude as a Carmelite hermit should, the silence and have an hour in their cells - beside the other 7 Divine Offices, 2 mental prayer times, spiritual reading, community rosary , a novena, daily mass. And they ARE a French Carmel founded from a French one. They have a hermitage for the professed nuns and one only for the novitiate. And they USE these hermitages! They don't collect dust from not being used!

They sing the hymns in the Divine Office and do recite the rest but the WAY they recite it! So slow, reverently, holy. I can see where they do not use a chant or sing it as a mortification of the senses and give themselves to God and strip the senses of things like that. As I recite the office myself at home, it wasn't strange to me. I can also see - as I did at the Dominicans, Cristo Rey and Philly Carmels where you could (like I would!) be too busy worrying or paying attention to the chanting - like staying in tune, trying to learn and sing, learn the intricacies of it, etc. and not put your whole heart and soul in it and be preoccupied with the music tempo, watching the sister "conducting" and so on. By the end of the 1st day I LOVED the way they did the office! They also sing the hymns at mass. Some Carmels have the monotone chant - though its in monotone during the week ... but still it was all very hard to follow I was told by several Carmelite nuns and feels very distracting to prayer.. and things in Latin was beautiful, but can be so difficult to pray. ***THIS IS THE OPINION OF SOME NUNS I'VE MET - NOT ALL! **** At first I thought having no chant or singing of the Office would be strange but after hearing them for 6 days, I have NEVER heard a more reverent nor holy Divine Office hours in all my visits! ****THIS WAY SPEAKS TO ME AND MAY NOT OTHERS! Of course one doesn't and shouldn't enter ANY order just because they sing or chant a certain way.

They recite the Our Father at the end of the Intercessory prayers so slow also! You can meditate, savor, think about and really pray each word - just as St. Teresa did in her writing of the Our Father.

Mother was so cute and showed me the parts of their habit they wear. She sat on a stool and put up her leg to show me the stockings they wear! They wear a white tunic underneath and the sleeves go to the elbow and sewn on to this were brown sleeves, then a skirt with pockets in the front and the habit over that and the scapular and rosary and belt and the veil and head piece. I thought I was an under veil and Annie said they do wear one - little unclear with this though. But they do not tuck in their veil at all - as St. Therese didn't. Now they might do something while working or something for tasks that require it - like on their website of the sisters cleaning the chapel it is outside the scapular still but the sides are pinned back or something. But for the majority of the chores the veil is just out. It is hard to see the veils and the white part in those pictures I noticed. In some pictures it looks like they are like other Carmels with just that square of white in the front but they aren't right.

I got to speak to 2 priests that alternated the daily masses there and they raved about the sisters, their life and they themselves were so holy and edifying as priests! They said the mass so holy and reverently.

I was in a constant state of joy, happiness and excitement there! I was afraid I'd have a heart attack! I knew it was the end of the road for me! NOT because I had no place else to go to but because THIS IS the place! A sister, forgot her name, said she thought the same thing when she visited it! She is the youngest one. Well Annie is the youngest in religious years! She says it is so great to be young again!

The sisters are such great cooks too! They always sent out so much food for my lunch and dinner! I ate breakfast in my "flat" - apartment to us Americans! - after mass that was at 8 am and then I'd go back at 10 am and see Mother or another sister for an hour until 11 am when it was Sext, then I'd stay in the chapel - with much joy and love! - until 12:30 when I'd go to the dining parlor for lunch. Then see a sister from 1 pm to 2 pm that was None, rosary & a litany. Then I'd stay in the chapel again until 3 pm when I saw a sister until 4:30 pm and go to the chapel again for the 4:45 pm Vespers and mental prayer and stay there until 6 pm with them and then go to the dining parlor again for dinner and then sometimes saw a sister for 30 min or so at 7 pm. Then I'd go back to my flat for the evening. I just couldn't stop looking out the window at the monastery from my flat/apartment window!

The night before I left, Mother Mary of the Resurrection closed her eyes, and said a beautiful and moving blessing on me, for me while making the sign of the cross to bless me, my trip back here and my speedy return back to them! It was so beautiful I almost cried! Actually I got emotional several times while there - mostly in the chapel but also in other parts! all that I write is SO far to what I experienced felt there and feel now, it's so inadequate!

Its like if everyone discerning a Carmel could feel and know what I know and felt there and feel now, they'd RUN to this Carmel! Mother had said that there are no little groups or cliques in the community or BFFs (my word, NOT hers! lol) - as St. Teresa wanted all to be friends but not buddies with each other or just one or two as the MAIN FRIEND in Carmel is to be JESUS! Annie said the same as their rec time was so great and joyous! All the sisters get along and there is very little quirks, etc. that you would normally have anyway. It is due to their focus on God, there stripping of all unnecessary things like music at the Div Office, etc. and even pets so they focus on God and there fore the sisters. All the sisters love animals but I can REALLY see their point! As for me, I'd be so worried about the dog or cat being long, hungry, wanting affection, etc. and it would distract me from the real reason I wanted to enter Carmel - to find and be with God alone! As I have 3 dogs and 2 cats, I see the way I treat them and spend time with them, worry about the, etc.

It is SO quiet there! The silence is amazing! The rustle of a habit is startling in the silence! So never mind if they had a dog that would bark or walk across the floor with his nails! Or a cat meowing or playing and making noise, etc.!

Also Mother told me that once a month the sisters with family far away could have a 30 min phone call - if the family could pay they do and if not the monastery will pay. Also they have visits and I think longer and more frequent for a few days than families who live in England.

The weather was great! It was 60's to low 70's and a few days of rain with the nights about high 50's or so. and a lovely strong wind at times which had me thinking of the Holy Spirit rushing thru the upper room and filling Our Lady and the apostles! I came back here to Texas and it was 108 degrees! ugh!

In the dining parlor is a cabinet with a big drawer to the right of the table. This drawer can be pulled far out on the visitor side and then slid way in to the sisters side - this is how they deliver your trays of food to you. It was funny having to talk into the drawer to the sister on the other side if she asked me if I was ok and needed anything or had enough to eat! Boy did I! I think I gained 10 lbs on this visit! ha!

They are a very poor Carmel that survives by the work of their hands and in alms - just as St. Teresa of Avila wanted! They told me that there is a widowed woman in town who has a child care business or something who donates every week/month a huge portion of their food and they just order in the little remaining from a local company who gives them a big discount. Then there are the alms in the form of money they receive also.

On Friday morning (7/24), Mother told me the sisters would vote on me and that I could probably know later in the evening. So they voted for me around 4:30 pm and just before they I ate in their dining parlor (which has a small double grilled speaking grille in the same room - about 2.5 fr by 3 ft or something - Mother came there and told me that the sisters with much love and joy - ALL voted me in! So please, all pray my house sells so I can enter as soon as possible!

I am begging St. Therese to let me enter on her feast day, Oct 1st, so I can finally enter but also to be there for her relics that are coming to Sheffield Carmel on Oct 5th!

I put these pictures that a friend sent me who visited there and some are from their website - forgot to delete these! - but the pictures I took on my visit aren't in there yet - hopefully tonight or tomorrow. If they came out well, I will add them and repost the link. Photo Bucket: [url="http://s569.photobucket.com/albums/ss140/jmjtcarmelite/"]http://s569.photobucket.com/albums/ss140/jmjtcarmelite/[/url]

[NisiTe]

What a beautiful post!!! Even though I'm definitely a Dominican, there is a special place in my heart for Carmel and so it was a joy to read about such a beautiful and authentic Carmel...oh, and CONGRATULATIONS...I can only imagine the elation your experiencing right now and I too have had the joy of experiencing such (and still do, hehe)...may the Lord bless you and guide you! You have my prayers!

[InHisLove726]

Laudem, I am actually in tears of joy for you from reading your post!!!!!! I AM THRILLED FOR YOU!!!!! God be praised, now and forever, for giving you this AMAZING opportunity with the Carmelite Nuns and showing you where your true home is!!!!!!

I will be saying some BIG, ENORMOUS prayers for you to St. Joseph so that you can sell your house and also to St. Therese to let you enter on her feast day!!!!!!!!

I am overjoyed at the number of people entering very soon!!! God be praised for giving us all the chance to become one with Him!!!!

May His Sacred Heart keep you so close to Him these next few months as you sell off your property and get ready to enter into your new life!!! I am so happy that all the nuns were in unison about letting you in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll also ask Our Lady of Mount Carmel to wrap you tight in her loving mantle!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THIS IS FABULOUS NEWS!!!!!! I feel like dancing and crying tears of joy!!!!!

[HisChild]

Oh, how exciting! I'm definitely Carmelite at heart, so I rejoice with you in your discernment.

God bless you.

[truthfinder]

O Laudem,
I'm so excited for you! After hearing both your and Sr. Michael Maria's descriptions of Sheffield Carmel, it's one of the few Carmels I'd be very willing to visit no matter the cost incurred. By the way, do you know if they wear Communion veils (covers to about the nose to receive Holy Communion) or Great Veils (covers the whole face)? Not that it is important, just a little curious.
I'll be praying for you and for Sr. Michael Maria so that you may fulfill the will of the Lord, and I ask a few prayers for myself in my discernment with Carmel.
God bless you and give you the joy that can only be found in HIM.

[Laudem Gloriae]

Thank you for all your prayers and great posts. They have worn the lowered veils out in the community but they rarely go out. They don't use the communion veils over the face at mass - that I could see and I was too joyful and happy to think to ask!


Mother Mary wrote me this in one of her first emails to me when I contacted them:

[i]"If God is asking you to leave land and children - that is your "all", a very great deal.  He is trusting to your generosity and giving you the sweetness of His love now.  In Carmel, He is so often withdraws His Presence and for years and years we go along in naked faith - simply "going on" in determination to be faithful in the dark.  Can you do this?

Many women who aren't really aware of Carmel and what it means, what it is like, are overwhelmed by the isolation - as in silence, solitude and not being able to speak to the professed sisters.  This is especially hard at first if you are the only one in the novitiate!  Many people may want the silence and solitude but they still want and end up missing "people interaction" and seeing a town or city whether by outing or out their window!

A true Carmelite vocation is one of crucifying yourself on the empty cross that is in your cell, every second of every day.  We come to Carmel out of love and the desire for sacrifice ourselves for love of Him, for a closer union with Him for Him to be our all.  For some they must say "yes Lord" to every little thing.  Giving up our will, pride, judgments, our all is not easy at any age!  You must not come to Carmel, see the way things are done and think you know better or know an "easier or quicker" way!  Things are done for a reason - whether a special reason or just due to tradition and we are a VERY traditional Carmel! - more than any other Carmel in England.  But we are all happy and filled with joy here.  Though we have austerities, hardships, battle with self-will, have "dark nights of the souls" we are filled with peace, joy and love for God and souls."
[/i]


Below are 2 experiences from 2 different women who entered Sheffield Carmel but wasn't called to Carmel they discovered. I post this for anyone discerning Carmel and especially this beautiful Carmel!


[b]NOTE:[/b] These 2 experiences give a better view of this Carmel. BUT keep in mind that the 1ST EXPERIENCE was about 3-4 YRS AGO so things may have changed - I didn't get a chance to ask Mother everything these 2 women wrote and I didn't have these pages with me for reference. The 2ND EXPERIENCE was last year. ALSO they are each woman's experience.

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[b]Sheffield Carmel[/b]

A Postulant's Experience

Generally the house was large. All the floors were bare wooden floorboards or tiles. The only chairs were for infirm and elderly sisters, everyone else sat on low wooden stools. The walls were uniform cream, but they had verses of writing written on the walls in various places, except in cells and the chapel. Some were Bible verses, but there were other quotations from the Rule, St. Teresa, St. John of the Cross, etc and other sources. One of the quotations on a cell floor read: “In Carmel and at the judgment, I am alone with God”.

The professed sister, assigned to make sure I didn’t get lost for the first few days, was called an ‘Angel’.
Another custom is kneeling down on the floor (where-ever you were) each time you talked to Mother, or if Mother spoke to you more than a ’quick word’. She said that it wasn’t because of her as a person, it was just recognition that she spoke in the place of Christ within the community. Mother went on about how it showed humility. I was also surprised at the penances expected of the sisters. If a sister erred, she would kneel down in front of Mother immediately and kiss the floor! It was a beautiful sight to see – there was much love and respect during this.

Though they are austere and follow St. Teresa's rule stricter, they do have a kneeling option for sisters who can't kneel long or at all. For the two hours of mental prayer, they kneel the first 5 minutes, then for the next 50 minutes they either kneel, use a prayer stool or the choir seat and then kneel the last 5 minues – IF the sister can kneel that long (the 10 minutes), if not they would use the seat or prayer stool. Mother said that not being able to kneel for 2 hrs or even 10 minutes didn't dismiss you from being a Carmelite if that is what God called you to be – after all He KNOWS if you can kneel or not and if He CALLS you to Carmel, He is aware of this! When they processed after Sext (Midday Office) to the refectory, I had to follow at a distance, so I couldn’t join in the psalm they were chanting on the way.

The morning and evening Angelus was done with the appropriate Divine Office in choir while the noon Angelus you also knelt down where ever you where – which often happened as we were washing-up in the kitchen (everyone lends a hand with dishes). As the Angelus is rung, everyone stops what they’re doing and kneels down where they are, in front of the sink, the draining board, cupboards, refectory, wherever. They say the Angelus to themselves, do the sign of the cross get up and carry on with whatever they were doing. At three o’clock, the time Our Lord died, the bell rings to remind the sisters and wherever a sister is or whatever she’s doing (workroom, classroom, corridor etc), she stops and does a double kneel i.e. you kneel down and bend over so your forehead is somewhere near your knees. You stay there and say a prayer or just unite yourself to the Lord for the duration of the chapel bell, then you get up and carry on as before!

If you were going to help with the dishes after a meal, you knelt in front of a statue of Mary and said a Hail Mary quietly, before going into the kitchen. I helped with the dishes after dinner and supper, but after breakfast I had to visit four different places in the convent. We didn’t all go round in a group, but each sister had to visit these places at some point during the day. First you went into the ante chapel, bowed, knelt down in front of the beautiful statue of Our Lady of Carmel (with the baby Jesus) and said a prayer (it wasn’t set as to what you said or how long it was, it was your personal prayer). Then you got up, bowed and went to a little statue of Joseph bowed, knelt down and said a prayer to him. The last two places were upstairs where my cell was, but I think there were others elsewhere. One was a picture of St Teresa of Avila which you prayed to and the last was an icon of Our Lady of Perpetual Succour.

You also kneel down and kiss the floor of the choir, when entering and leaving. You also kissed the floor when you said a short prayer before bed. You knelt down, said your prayer, kissed the floor, stood up, crossed yourself with holy water (everyone had a little container of holy water on the wall, I’ve forgotten what they call it), then you sprinkled a little holy water over your bed, switched the light off, found your bed and went to sleep.

[b]A straw mattress[/b]

The straw mattress, as I had been warned, was hard. But I also found that it was warm and actually comfortable. It was hard to sit on, but when you were actually lying on it, it was great! The bed was a little shorter and narrower than a normal bed. I had no problem with that, although a larger person might have found it cramped. There wasn’t a pillowcase on the pillow. On the four corners of the pillow there were pins, not safety pins, so you had to be careful not to sleep near the corners. Under the pillow you kept a cotton rectangle just a bit smaller than one side of the pillow. You pinned this to the pillow every night, and every morning you unpinned it, folded it up and put it back under the pillow. When you woke up in the morning, you knelt up on the bed and said a set prayer, dedicating your day to God.

[b]In Habit[/b]
I wore a long, swishy, completely white veil. Apparently they were black at one stage, but Rev Mother didn’t like them black, so she told the ‘Habit Sister’ (in charge of clothing), to make me a white one. The veil I had was fixed to a headband which was also covered in the same white material, and it had two strings to tie it back with. I also had a black cape. My one had buttons down the front and reached to the hips. You put your hands together underneath it, as sisters had their hands under their scapulars. The idea is the keep your hands still and out of sight in ‘recollected prayer position’, unless they’re being used in holding your books or working. I was lent a long black underskirt and another long skirt to go over the top of it. I wore a long black skirt and over the waist-band of the over skirt I had a little pouch which acted as a sort of ‘outside pocket’. In this you kept a handkerchief, a little prayer book (for some extra prayers and graces said at certain times).

The refectory was a large rectangular room. It had benches to sit on which were arranged against the walls with large tables in front of them. While sitting on your bench you were not allowed to lean back against the walls (unless you had a problem or elderly – but even the elderly nuns were so holy and loving they always sat up! They did it for the love of God) even if you had finished your meal and were waiting, the infirm sisters had chairs. Before beginning any meal, you made the sign of the cross over your bread and kissed it. After Mass you had breakfast, which you went to informally. You hooked up your skirt and ate your breakfast standing up on the opposite side of the table from which you sat. After you had kissed your bread, you poured a little water into your bowl made the sign of the cross and drank it. Then you got your tea in your mug, there was sugar available for that if you wished. Also on the tea trolley was vitamin tablets and mineral supplements for the sisters to take. Each sister’s bread was already weighed and placed on her refectory place ready for her. It was one slice of brown bread (which was shop brought) and one very thick slice of white bread (which was home made). Also in your place, on a dish under a lid was some butter for the bread, except on Fridays where you ate your bread dry as a mortification. You could have as much water as you liked, but you had to eat all your bread. There wasn’t anything else to choose from, no cereals or jam, just bread, butter, tea and water. After breakfast, you put your unused butter on the side in the little pantry and washed up your mug and knife and returned them to your place. You then got another piece of bread from the basket, for use during dinner, bowed to the crucifix and left.

The Sisters processed to dinner after the little office of Sext, while reciting a psalm. Then there was a grace and responses said, after which the sisters went to their places and folded their long sleeves back. You didn’t tuck your skirt up because you were sitting for dinner and supper. The next part was to undo the safety pins on the corners of the over-sized serviette and I pinned it to the front of my cloak. I didn’t know what it was called, but it was a large rectangular piece of cotton. Each sister had a separate one which marked her place, like a personal tablecloth. On it was her mug, bowl, small plate and cutlery. The front of it was used as a napkin, in the middle of the week, you turned it round and used the other end for a napkin and on a certain day they were all changed. On fast days (I didn’t get round to knowing what days were fasting and which weren’t) you folded this napkin in half and replaced your things on it ready for the next meal, you also did that every day after dinner ready for supper. The food was good and there was also a separate tea-break in the afternoon, which you drank whilst standing up, like breakfast. Dinner (after Sext) was the main meal and supper was a lighter meal.
When you finished your soup or the food on your plate, you cut a piece of your bread and then wiped it round your bowl or plate, then ate it. When you had finished eating, you swept your breadcrumbs together with your hand and picked them up with your spoon or onto your finger and ate them. Then you put water into your little bowl (there was a different one for soup that appeared when needed), and washed with your fingers your spoon, knife and fork, then you drank the water, dried everything on a corner of your napkin after unpinning it from your front, made everything ready for the next meal, put your hands under your cloak and sat quietly, not leaning on the wall, to wait for closing grace. After grace, everyone went out and knelt in front of a statue of Mary to say a Hail Mary to themselves before the work of washing up, for which I was allowed to take my cloak off.

[b]Chapel[/b]

One interesting thing I did experience there, was what they called the ‘Saturday Salve’. If it wasn’t a feast or other solemnity, Saturday Mass was in honour of Mary, but there was this extra part just before Vespers. I was given a lighted candle and stood in the dark at the end of the stalls, nearest to the grille. Then the sisters processed in carrying candles, sung a hymn to Mary (Salve Regina) then blew their candles out. Then the lights were switched on and we said Vespers. A nice little ceremony, I liked it. The Rosary was said after Mass or after Tierce, depending on how long Mass took.
In chapel, the criss-cross grille was closest to the sanctuary, then there were heavy glass or plastic sliding doors, on the sisters side there were wooden shutters decorated with wooden crosses. With the shutters closed, the sisters chapel made a nice little prayer space all by itself. They only opened the shutters and glass doors during Mass only so you could see and hear it being celebrated, through the grille. There was a little door to the side of the grille, usually kept locked, which opened to reveal a space to kneel and a small arched glassless window into the sanctuary, without a grille. To receive communion each sister knelt in this little space and received the wafer on her tongue. The chalice had been passed to a sister through this window before and was given to every sister in turn, before being returned through the window to the priest, to offer to the public in the main nave.

I didn’t go to all the Offices, but I was expecting to go to Compline, which in this convent isn’t the last Office of the day. I like Compline, but I wasn’t to go to it. I was woken in time to go to Mass and was sent to bed after second recreation at about 7:45pm. But it took me a while to get to bed with such an odd, and time consuming routine.

[b]Laundry, jugs, bowls and H.O.’s[/b]

Perhaps washing deserves a mention. Underwear and any delicate items were washed by hand by the Sister they belonged to (unless she was infirm). You did your personal laundry in the laundry room in a bucket of hot water with a bar of soap. But what I found fascinating about the laundry was something I had only seen before in a museum – a mangle! First you tightened these large screws on the top that pressed the rollers together. Then you fed it your washed items, one at a time, from one side, and turned the handle, which turned the two large rollers. The item came out, squashed, the other side, while the water from it ran down into a trough below the rollers and was channeled into a spout that dribbled into a bucket. I found it fascinating that the only thing used to power it was arm muscles, and whether or not the electricity was working you could still get the washing done! The damp washing was hung on hot water pipes until it was completely dry, they couldn’t go outside at the time as it was raining.

In your cell, you had a small jug for cold/drinking water, but for personal washing it was more complicated. From under your bed you pulled out your washing equipment. First there was a large, clear, hard wearing, plastic sheet that you spread on the floor of your cell, then you put a cotton square piece of material in the middle of it. On this square you put a large ceramic bowl. In your bowl there was kept a number of things that you took out: your hand towel (there was a larger one for baths/showers), a soap dish (with a soap bar on it), your toothpaste, toothbrush, a flannel, and a cotton drawstring bag in which you kept your hairbrush and comb. You also found and pulled out, from under your bed, a separate, large, plastic container with a lid and a handle. You collected warm water in your large metal water jug (a very different size from your pottery, drinking water jug). It was quite a trek from my cell to collect the water. You washed in your cell, with your jug and bowl, on the floor. You left the washing things out overnight, and then used the rest of the water in the jug, which was cold by then, for washing in the morning – wonderful to offer up to God! You tipped your used water into the large plastic container and took it out of your cell in the morning, to tip into the toilet down the corridor and clean the container in the large sink there. It was also this plastic thing that you used, if you wanted the loo in the night. This was to avoid making a noise by flushing and waking sisters up (I apologize if your eating while reading this)!

While we’re on the subject of toilets the sisters had a very odd name for it, that I haven’t heard before. They called it an H.O, that stood for ‘Humble Office’, which caused me to break out in giggles. Apart from the odd thing with the toilet rolls, a person also had to think carefully about which toilet to use (just one more point then I’ll change the subject)! The sisters had had extra loos put into the building, but they were very likely to get blocked because of the size of the pipes. So the sisters had to be very careful not to put ‘anything’ which could cause a blockage down them. Anything apart from water and toilet roll, needed to be put in the main toilets which had proper pipes. I found it extremely peculiar to have to give this normal function such careful thought. I suppose you got used to it after a while.

This odd plumbing system also affected the baths and shower. The community had three baths between them (each sister was allocated a specific night to have hers, once a week). Actually one of the most amusing experiences was washing my hair. Hair is washed in the laundry. No, not in a bucket, there is a plastic bowl which you can fill from the hot tap (there is a hot tap in the laundry as well). It was actually amusing as my Angel was there as well to help me. I dipped the top of my head into the bowl which was on the draining board near the sink, but couldn’t work out how to make the rest of it wet enough to wash. My Angel filled a jug with hot water and tipped it over my head, it did the trick and I was able to wash my hair with her tipping jugs of hot water over the back of my head to rinse the shampoo off. I don’t know what it was, but I found the whole situation a giggling affair. Some of it may have been due to the passing sisters who looked amused, the laundry is after all a public room, as far as they’re concerned. The sisters have short hair that dries with a towel, but Angel managed to borrow a hair dryer from the infirmary for me.

[b]Cells and the garden[/b]

The cell layout was indeed very simple. On the outside of my cell door was a picture of Our Lady giving the Rosary to St Dominic. Every sister had a different little picture for her cell door. Inside, the cell was small, painted plain cream and had bare wooden floorboards, with a light fixed to the wall. On the walls, I was actually surprised to see so many pictures. There was one of St Therese of Lisieux, one of St Joseph and one of St Teresa of Avila. The most imposing feature was an enormous black wooden cross which had a wall to itself which had no corpus on it. My Angel explained that the cross was bare because the sister was a victim, crucified and offered herself, put herself on this cross for God.

My little bed was in one corner, with the little dipper of Holy water by the side of it, one of the standard low wooden stools, a table, a small bookshelf (on the wall) and a corner shelf, to put your water jugs on. There was also a large bag made of tough paper which stood on the floor, in this was your toilet roll, a note-pad, a pencil, a pen, and some envelopes. Also on the floor, was a small wicker work basket containing some sewing things, scissors and some linen to darn (I needed a lesson on how to do that). I also kept one of my own bags in the cell with my toiletries in it. What I didn’t need, was put into a storage area with my suitcases, which I had free access to for as long as I remained a postulant. In your cell, you only kept a change of underwear and anything you wanted to wear the next day if it was different (e.g. a t-shirt) underneath your pillow. I was in a cell next to the novitiate classroom. The classroom was also an 'overflow' for some possessions. There was a chest of drawers in the novitiate where you could keep the rest of your clothes, craft work, and things that you didn’t require immediately but you could need easy access to. There was also a large bookcase where you could keep your books.

The cell had a large window, without curtains. You didn’t really need net curtains though, as I was on the third floor overlooking part of the garden and woodland. I also had a beautiful view of the surrounding area. What you could see varied from day to day, depending on the weather. Sometimes you were lucky to see the wall of the enclosure at the end of the garden, sometimes you could see for miles to layers of hills you didn’t know were there, before ending in grey misty peaks. The windows opened out on to the fragrant mountain air, but inside those were another set of windows that opened into the room, so you could shut both pairs for warmth and not lose any light. Instead of proper curtains for use at night, they had wooden shutters on the inside of the room. There was an especially lovely view at night when it was clear, as you could see all the lights of Sheffield, further along there were other lights belonging to the villages and rows of lights marking the roads. Sometimes the lines of hills were marked by the lights going up and down the tops of them, it was a most fantastic view.

The grounds were large and they also had an underground spring. It was the original source of water for the Sisters of Mercy and orphans, when the place was an orphanage, which was what most of the building was designed as. This is why a large part of the convent looks like a French town house! Attached to the newer part of the house, there is a small wing, still in use, of an even older building. It’s size and shape suggests it was originally a farmhouse or a barn. When the Carmelite nuns moved there they built the large visitors Chapel and extended their living area inside the enclosure. It was built in local stone and blends into the area as if it has been there forever!
Part of the grounds grow vegetables and fruit, but there’s also a flower garden and a woodland area, which the local pheasants take refuge in. Surrounding the garden is the enclosure wall which is made in dry stone walling. The Sisters have to keep a check on this wall because in some areas the strength of the wind actually causes a bulge in the wall, once this happens it won’t last long, as wind and rain get in and cause it to fall apart. This isn’t so bad if it looks on to the local farmer’s fields, although it does have to be repaired if it falls down to a certain level. The most urgent part of the wall, is that which runs along the lane (you can’t really call it a road), as cars, walkers and tourists go by there. Local farmers usually repair the wall for the sisters, though sometimes they do have to call in people to reinforce it with mortar if it’s a particular trouble spot.

[b]Absolute Enclosure[/b]

Entering Kirk Edge Carmel was like stepping back in time. The isolation, lack of traffic, buildings and modern trappings meant that you could be anywhere, at any point in time. It felt quite surreal but beautiful. There was separation even from family and visitors. I’m used to chapels and even parlours that have little gate-like structures that can be opened, to serve as a grille. But never before have I come across a fixed criss-cross grille which is built into the wall and cannot be moved or opened. A sister will only ever come out for hospital treatment or serious dental treatment. A female doctor from the local surgery comes to the convent to see sick sisters.
Keep in mind that Sheffield Carmel will not let you in unless you join as a Postulant. They told me that 'live-ins' are a modern idea and they don't do that. To go into enclosure, you must be a Postulant (unless you're doing essential building maintenance). The Rev Mother and Sisters were loving, peaceful and joyful at all times.

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[b]2nd Postulant Experience[/b]

Their motto is "nothing, nothing, nothing." - taken from St. John of the Cross. They don't have many no colors throughout the monastery - mostly black, white, brown or grey The Mother has a the computer access for vocational contact with women only. Thank God they didn't have internet surfing nuns and blogs! All had to work during recreations (sewing or some such).

HERMITAGES: I used it whenever Mother allowed sisters to go out to the garden for meditations. Sometimes several days in a row. It does depend on the weather- whether Mother allows sisters out in the garden. I had a lot of time in my cell.

MEALS: I like English food, so the meals were great. Lots of soups, stews, and porridge. Lots of veggies.

NO EXTERN SISTERS: The family, living in the lodge, do their necessary shopping, in exchange for paying the monastery a lower rent for their part of the lodge. The other couple in the lodge help in other ways. The woman takes care of the visitor's flat and sacristry and the man has helped them with their website. The female doctor visits the monastery. Sisters must leave for the dentist, though. They only go out when absolutely, positively necessary. Very rarely. Mother is very strict about this. Sheffield is the only Carmel in England that does not participate in outside meetings with other Carmels. - yeah!

NOVITIATE: The Novice Mistress saw me on Mondays, every other Wednesday, Thursdays, and Saturdays, for Catechism, readings on The Way of Perfection and The Journey to Carith, and sessions on discussing the Sunday Gospel readings. Mother saw me on Tuesdays to discusss the history of the Carmels, especially in England. Sister Rosarii, the turn sister, saw me on Fridays for Catholic Church history. The postulants and novices have access to the Novice Mistress whenever needed.

PRIESTS: Fr. Goonan is an Irish Marist priest who is very nice. I talked with him before entering. Traditional minded. He supports the nuns. Gives great spiritual direction, help.

“ALARM CLOCK”! They use the matraque – that wooden clapper thing in the am.

POSTULANT WORK: Cleaning up the refectory every day and putting out all the dishes. Drying dishes and helping out after meals. Gardening for Mother, whenever she asked. And sewing for the sister in the Robe Room twice a day, at recreations. Also helping out with folding laundry once a week. I also did some work typing up correspondence for Mother, on my computer. And they had me knitting an afghan to put on sale.

BED: A tough, handmade straw mattress on boards, on iron legs. Rough woolen sheets pinned to the mattress with long hat pins. The white sheet (in lieu of a pillow case) must be pinned to the pillow every night with straight pins. But the bed was fairly comfortable.
 
LIGHTS OUT: The nuns on the wing were I was put are supposed to have lights out by 10 p.m.

BATHS/SHOWERS: Sisters can take a bath or a shower twice a week, and there is hot water. All other days, they bath from a small aluminium bowl in their cells. Again, with hot water.

KNEELING FOR 2 HRS OF MENTAL PRAYER: Meditation periods begin with a five minute period of kneeling up on the knees (for younger or able to nuns) and end the same way. The rest of the time, you can kneel using prayer stools. Some of the older ones, in their 50s and 60s, sit on short stools. Those older than that sit in their stalls.

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[InHisLove726]

That's incredible! It's like stepping back in time when St. Teresa of Avila or St. Therese of Lisieux were in Carmel! What an amazing testimonial from the first postulant. Thank you for sharing!

[Thomist-in-Training]

I was just getting monastery-homesick today, so it's lovely to hear about this wonderful Carmel. No washing dishes (except rinsing) sounds really ascetical to me, strangely, even though I leave forks and glasses lying around and use them again later.

Laudem Gloriae, I'm [i]so [/i]pleased for you! Thank you for these fantastic posts.

[tnavarro61]

this is very touching, laudem! i assure you I finished reading it! i enjoyed reading your post and i can feel your happiness and excitement, esp when all of the nuns voted for you. How is that! That's great! i wish i could expereince the same...!

[DameAgnes]

Laudem, I am so pleased for you that you have found your "home" and I have been talking to St. Joseph about your selling your house. Wondered, if you couldn't just give your kids power of attorney to manage the sale so you can just go, finally, to your beloved?

[VeniteAdoremus]

Wow. I'm so happy for you! I recognise a few things from your experience - the love between the sisters, for example, is also what attracted me to my community

We're invading England from East and West... and the Lord knows it's necessary!

[PrayerSupporter]

[quote name='Laudem Gloriae' post='1932473' date='Jul 26 2009, 02:41 PM']Well, I returned from the Kirk Edge (Sheffield) Carmel in the UK yesterday. It was beyond beautiful!

They are a very poor Carmel that survives by the work of their hands and in alms

I am begging St. Therese to let me enter on her feast day, Oct 1st, so I can finally enter but also to be there for her relics that are coming to Sheffield Carmel on Oct 5th![/quote]

Dear Laudem Gloriae,

How wonderful to read of your trip to Sheffield! It sounds like the most lovely Carmel!! I have been praying for Sister Michael Maria often, and will add you to those prayers as well (both for your entrance to Sheffield and the sale of your house -- soon!). It would be perfect if all could go well and you could enter on St. Therese's feast!

I would like to offer a donation to Sheffield, but wonder if they would be able to cash a check in U.S. dollars from a U.S. bank. Do you know? If that is not a good way to send them a donation, what way would work for them?

Okay...off to pester St. Therese a bit about this situation!

[rosamundi]

[quote name='PrayerSupporter' post='1932982' date='Jul 27 2009, 01:50 PM']I would like to offer a donation to Sheffield, but wonder if they would be able to cash a check in U.S. dollars from a U.S. bank. Do you know? If that is not a good way to send them a donation, what way would work for them?[/quote]

When I once tried to pay a US Dollar cheque into my UK bank account, it cost me a significant percentage of the value of the cheque - something like 25%, once commission and other charges had been applied. Unless the situation has changed significantly, I wouldn't suggest making a donation in this fashion.

My aunt, who lives in north America, used to order International Money Orders in Sterling for my brother and I for Christmas. I seem to recall she got them from the post office. I don't know what they cost her, but they didn't cost me anything to pay into my account. Now, of course, she just buys us Amazon vouchers!

If you decide to go down the International Money Order route, you may need to find out what name the Community's bank account is in, as I think they were made out to me, like a cheque would be.

[VeniteAdoremus]

Oh, great idea - I'll be visiting St. Therese's relics the week after my entrance. She's my confirmation saint, and St. Joseph is the patron of my congregation... if those two can't sort your house out...

[Noemi]

It was wonderful... I loved both testimonies (from the 2 postulants - are they still in?) and Laudem's one. I love the "alarm clock" - it's like in the "Therese" film was! *happy*


I should visit the Hungarian Carmel...