Write A Story About Resurrexi

[Resurrexi]

[missionseeker]

[jeffpugh]

"Heh, so there was a chump who survived after all"

"How did you find me?" Asked the befuddled Res.

"I followed your stench of chumpiness. Actually, I saw smoke, and smelled beans. I marked all the canned beans in the Wal-Mart just in case. I've been searching for survivors ever since."

"I know we haven't gotten along in the past," Res said, "but do you want to take rest with me tonight? I loaded up on goodies. You must be hungry."

MIkolbe pulls out a can of olives from his backpack. "I would be honored," he complied.

Both parties sat down by the fire and consumed canned goods.

[missionseeker]

Until Res remembered that it was Saturday night. "Oh dear. I must find a parish that is run by the Priestly Fraternity of St. Peter." he mumbled.

"Res," said Jason, "before the meteor the nearest one was three hundred miles away. No telling how far one is now. Either way," he shrugged "you can't get to Tupelo by tomorrow."

[kafka]

To which Res replies, "Which is why I go nowhere without my vintage 1958 Latin-English Marian Missal, as well as a backup 1945 Fr. Lasance edition. At first light tommorrow we can wake up and have a service in honor of the Sabbath day by reciting the proper and canon in Latin!!!"

To which Jason sighes and rolls his eyes up to the high heavens as if imploring God for a tornado to pass through and transport him to Oz, "At least they would have merlot and crab-cakes in Oz." He murmurs to himself.

"What was that?" Res answers.

"Oh nothing just I really could go for some merlot now."

A few hours pass, as Jason and Res with stomachs at least for the moment, sated on beans, begin to tell stories of the good ole days on Phatmass when Res would start a poll only to have Mikolbe close it.

Pondering Res asked, "How did it feel to be a mod?"

To which Jason replied, "Its not what its cracked up to be, especially when I had to deal with chumps like you. I mean sometimes I wondered just what the hell was going on up there in the ole noggin. And then there was Hassan."

They both stare at eachother, a moment passes, and they burst out laughing so loud a pack of zombies in the neighborhood are suddenly roused by the sound of fresh blood.

Eventually they doze off, light dawns, the 7th day. . .

Edited July 10, 2009 by kafka

[Paddington]

Res woke up with a headless zombie on top of him, but not in time to hear sword-wielding MIkolbe telling the zombie he should've used his head.

MIkolbe helps Res up. "I think we are safe now, but that one was close," said MIkolbe.
"You can start with the readings now, lil partner. I mean, after we roll this feller into the marsh."

The readings took 3 hours - which didn't seem long enough - and refreshed the duo's spirits.

MIkolbe stocked his sword, and said, "we got plenty time to hit Wal-Mart for a new tent. And, I have an idea for these shopping carts after we collect more of them."

Res grabbed Harper and patted him on the head. MIkolbe thought of a few jokes, and while deciding which joke to tell, realized that Res simply must have needed companionship more than he needed Latin, causing MIkolbe to stare at him sentimentally for two to three seconds. "Saddle up Harper," said MIkolbe causing Res a thrill and involuntary cheesy smile.

On to Wal-Mart they went and filled two shopping carts. Res wasn't aware of the granola, jerky and dried fruit section just behind the awful, gaseous rotting smell section, but MIkolbe was filled with helpful tidbits on this excursion.

"I know a bookstore we can hit," said MIkolbe.

"There is a huge boulder covering the only entrance and the windows are crushed down," said a mildly irritated Res.

MIkolbe let him vent, but knew that their combined strength could do something about said boulder. On they went to the store, and using teamwork with a large plank from the hardware section removed said boulder. The store was covered with roaches and infection save for two books in a plastic bag outside of the restroom. These books couldn't have been more necessary: The Boxcar Children and a Catholic Bible.

"I have mixed feelings about this On Your First Communion Precious Moments Catholic Bible," said Res.

"We all have a cross, greenhorn. We all have a cross," said MIkolbe, who if he were asked, would've shared the screen name, age and fancy predilections of his cross. MIkolbe tried flushing to no avail, and they began the journey home.

[T-Bone _]

On their way home, they came across countless coyotes and other vermin. Rexi wanted to hunt them down for a quick snack, but MIKolbe had other ideas--they'd eat the granola they pilfered from the abandoned Wal-Mart.

"I'm going to get a coyote anyway," Rexi said as he ran off into the bushes. MIKolbe just stood there watching, crunching on his granola.

Rexi returned unsuccessful in his endeavors, unless by successful you mean covered with coyote bites. "We better rub some garlic in those wounds, kid," MIKolbe muttered, worried that Rexi might turn into a were-coyote. After treating Rexi's numerous bitemarks, the two continued on there way, one smelling a bit like a Caesar salad, the other chuckling mildly...

[MIKolbe]

MIKolbe put his arm around Rexi, and said, 'you're pretty cool, dude!!!'

Rexi stopped, tilted his head, and said 'tell me something i don't know'.

MIKolbe was proud. Thoughts of a taking on a protege entered his mind.....

[kafka]

And so they stroll back to camp only after a while their stroll falls into a wander. Confused Res rubs his eyes and takes another look at his compass, "This is no good. The needle is spinning around like a thurible in the hands of an inexperienced altar boy. There must be interference in the electromagnetic field."

Mikolbe looks around for a sign of anything only to notice a little opening in the forest.

"Here this way chumpette, let's see where this leads to."

They come upon the opening to notice that they are at the edge of the forest with a vast dry plain with several rolling hills stretching out to the horizon and in the distance towering up like ancient Babel herself were signs of civilization.

"Ha Ha! That must be Vegas!" cries Mikoble.

"And look cries Rexi, there seems to be some sort of beacon flashing from one of the buildings."

Filled with hope that a city which once occupied with millions of inhabitants would yield a good bottle of merlot, Mikolbe unsheaths his Katana and declares 'Let us go forth!' Res filled with fantasies of Denzinger volumes follows suit and they march off into the desert crossing toward the home of Celine Dion. Meanwhile Harper senses danger looming in the air. . .

[jeffpugh]

"Where are we going?" asked the tired Rexi.

"Apparently the home of Celine Dion," replied the satisfied MIkolbe.

"You realize that's way up north, in Quebec, even?"

MIkolbe harumphed and took a swig of merlot from the bottle. "At least I'm not drinking alone today."

"You know it."

[Christie_M]

[Nihil Obstat]

I love how Kafka writes in the present tense.

[QuoteMan]

Yet Sacred Music Man, MIKolbe, T-Bone_, and Paddington all write in past-tense...

Edited July 11, 2009 by QuoteMan

[kafka]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' post='1916876' date='Jul 10 2009, 06:10 PM']I love how Kafka writes in the present tense. [/quote]
Yes, it took me a couple of posts to figure that out. It works well

[quote name='QuoteMan' post='1916996' date='Jul 10 2009, 09:34 PM']Yet Sacred Music Man, MIKolbe, T_Bone_, and Paddington all write in past-tense...[/quote]
apparently they've never read, Nabokov or Danielewski.

[kafka]

They arrive at the edge of Sin City contemplating what to do next as the sun gently blazes down the hill towards the City of Angels. By this time Harper's cover is sunburned. Res is getting anxious since he has only recited matins when it is already time to recite vespers. Mikolbe is peering into the city in search of the beacon spotted earlier.

Res dumbstruck at the sight of the ruins once known as Vegas:

'I found Her in the shining of the stars,
I marked Her in the flowering of Her sins,
But in Her ways with men not I found God.
God waged His wars, and now she passed and died.
As if some meteoric descent from out mouths of gods!
O me! O Vegas for why is all around us here,
Shames Sodom and Gamorrah the destruction"

By this time Mikolbe is fighting off dry heaves, as he interrupts, "Shhhshh look its the beacon."

They squint there eyes into the desolate ruins and discern a flash of light near the former Strip.

"There," says Mikolbe, "The flashing it must be some sort of code."

"I memorized mores code when I was three," cries Rexi.

"Then stop being a chump and decode it S'mores "

Rexi hones in on the flash of lights. They emanate from the Casino Luxor, once the site of sins untold before the great Meteor of 2012, now cursed among the tinker toy ruins once known as the Belagio, and Caesar's Palace.

"What does it say?" grumbles the Italian Stallion.

"T
H
E
R
E

I
S

N
O

S
P
O
O
N"

confirms Rexi.

Mikolbe's stomach flutters and heart skips. He knows who is at the other end of the signal.

"It is HASSAN!"

"O my God," He utters like Rachael.

It is him. We must find him, only stay close, the moon rises, the zombies are summoned.

Edited July 11, 2009 by kafka