Quite A Dilemma!

[InHisLove726]

It will be a while before I can speak to my spiritual director again because he is on vacation, and I'm a little confused about my vocation. I honestly don't know whether I should look into strictly contemplative orders, or if I should look at active/contemplative orders. It's quite a dilemma.

I love the idea of contemplative life because I am great lover of silence. I don't feel comfortable in noisy surroundings. Last night, things in the house were just VERY noisy and I felt irritable because I wanted silence. I've always been a "country" gal, anyway. I never liked big cities or crowded towns. Plus, living in a natural surrounding with trees, flowers, and streams is just so prayer-conducive!

But then you have the beautiful order of the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal. Has anyone ever been to one of their convents? I know they are in the Bronx, and I just wondered how noisy the neighborhood is. If it's anything like Manhattan, that's quite the opposite of what I had in mind. However, I love their apostolates! I know it's something I could do.

I just don't know if I want to give up the contemplative life for an active life. I feel more suited to contemplative prayer, however, I do have to work on interior silence. I'm strongly considering looking at the Visitandines and Poor Clare orders. I still love the Franciscan lifestyle very much, and I want to keep looking. Does anyone know of any orders of Poor Clares that are not strict with penances? That's one of the reasons I want to look into the Visitation orders. I am not suited for strict penances such as fasting.

Thank you for your help!

[CatherineM]

Are there any orders that have both that you can go back and forth to?

[InHisLove726]

[quote name='CatherineM' post='1908309' date='Jul 2 2009, 03:40 PM']Are there any orders that have both that you can go back and forth to?[/quote]

Hmmmmm, I don't quite know. I'm looking for orders like this.

Has anyone ever visited the Little Sisters of St. Francis? I am looking at their website again, and I am reading that they are contemplative but not cloistered! I wonder if that means they can visit home once a year?

[url="http://www.littlesistersofstfrancis.org/"]http://www.littlesistersofstfrancis.org/[/url]

[TeresaBenedicta]

Honestly, don't worry too much about your spiritual director being out of town with this part of discernment. That's what all of this is... discernment. Take this opportunity to just ask God what He's asking of you... and then sit back and wait. Be quiet and listen. If you feel inspired to make a move, like contacting a new order... do so... And then when your spiritual director comes back, talk with him about everything that has been going on.

There's no rush, really. And, perhaps your spiritual director being out of town is a sign that you're not supposed to be making big decisions right now anyways.

Aaaand, if all else fails, and you really need to talk to him... give him a call. Of course, I tend to keep this as last resort, myself. But, if your s/d is anything like mine, if you call and it's important, he's glad you called and is more than willing to stop what he's doing to help out.

[the lords sheep]

I've visited the CFRs in the Bronx, and it's... well, the Bronx. It's an inner city convent in a poor and not always safe neighborhood (although I don't believe any of the Sisters or Friars have ever had any problem). There are buses and cars with loud music and the subway is near by- but that's the nature of the inner city. It is not nearly as populated as Manhattan, but it's still a FAR cry from even suburban life.

As far as your discernment goes: take a breath and slow down. You don't need to figure it out today, or even tomorrow. The Lord will reveal in his own time, and if you are trying to rush it, you may be too busy to really discern his call. I first suspected that I was called to religious life at 15. I began getting to know Sisters and their Charisms at 16, and I began contacting orders to discern whether I was called and where I was called when I went to college at 19. I will be 24 when I enter- but the Lord didn't choose to reveal all this to me until I had been open to and seeking his will for almost 5 years. It just takes time. Be at peace, and know that the Lord will put the right group in your path when He is good and ready.

And, if you're like me, it will be somewhere you never expected to end up, but that you know fits you and is what the Lord is calling you to.

God bless!
Lauren

[InHisLove726]

I don't think you have to worry about me making a hasty decision now. I'm determined to wait until I know the community at least 6 months before applying to another order again. (Unless, of course, the Holy Spirit is absolutely persistent!)

I do think it would be wise to check out both Franciscan and Visitandine orders before making a decision. I have been intrigued by the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal for a long time, so they would be first on my list. Then, I think I'd look into the Snellville, GA and Tyringham, MA Visitations. In fact, I'm going to send a letter to both asking for more information and just take this one step at a time.

God bless!

Edited July 3, 2009 by InHisLove726

[mariaassunta]

Just trust in God. As one talking from long and hard experiences I can tell you in Gods timing will your known path in life be revealed. Trust, Surrender, Believe and receive!

[Jennifer G.]

Sometimes churches in cities aren't always noisy. My church is in the county (just outside of the city), but it's common to hear firetrucks, police cars, ambulances, plus the church bells from across the street going off at each hour. Ironically, the cathedral in the city is pretty quiet. It's in a large (county-like) residential area, too. Now, myself, I like cities (out in the middle of nowhere just feels too lonely...), but for prayer and contemplation, I prefer someplace a bit quieter.

[VeniteAdoremus]

All I can say is, I wouldn't worry about things like location. You'll see, you will find a beautiful spot and within three years they send you somewhere you never thought you'd end up

I remember being stunned that my mum would move to a house on a hill in the middle of nowhere. Six years later I'm entering a priory in the middle of a National Park. Figures.

[Thomist-in-Training]

[quote name='InHisLove726' post='1908306' date='Jul 2 2009, 03:30 PM']It will be a while before I can speak to my spiritual director again because he is on vacation, and I'm a little confused about my vocation. I honestly don't know whether I should look into strictly contemplative orders, or if I should look at active/contemplative orders. It's quite a dilemma. [/quote]

I had that problem for [i]quite [/i]a long time, and it surely was frustrating to me too. The only thing that helped at all was visiting. Sitting around thinking about it really didn't help, nor did asking different people what they thought. I think visiting the Visitandines as you mentioned would probably be great, because they offer time to visit within the cloister. Some other orders do too now, but usually only once you are pretty serious about entering.
-----------------------------------------

ACTUALLY, looking over my reply, I remember that I'm lying. Visiting helped me feel [i]convinced [/i]that I could live in a cloister. However, the thing that actually allowed to know whether I'm called to contemplative or active was specifically asking Our Lady to help me. So, you could try that. ([i]While[/i] visitig a convent, I made a novena in honor of the Immaculate Conception and on the last day, I was sure of what to do... although not HOW! The appropriate thing to say here isn't, perhaps, "don't expect miracles" but "perhaps only one miracle at a time!")

[quote]I love the idea of contemplative life because I am great lover of silence. I don't feel comfortable in noisy surroundings. Last night, things in the house were just VERY noisy and I felt irritable because I wanted silence. I've always been a "country" gal, anyway. I never liked big cities or crowded towns. Plus, living in a natural surrounding with trees, flowers, and streams is just so prayer-conducive! [/quote]

True, but not all monasteries are in natural surroundings, although they most always have gardens as far as I know so you have a slice of nature at least. The Dominican Nuns of Buffalo, for one, are right in the middle of the city--a bit slummy, in fact. They used to be further from the center of the city, but the city grew towards them as the decades went on!

[quote]I just don't know if I want to give up the contemplative life for an active life. I feel more suited to contemplative prayer, however, I do have to work on interior silence. I'm strongly considering looking at the Visitandines and Poor Clare orders. I still love the Franciscan lifestyle very much, and I want to keep looking. Does anyone know of any orders of Poor Clares that are not strict with penances? That's one of the reasons I want to look into the Visitation orders. I am not suited for strict penances such as fasting.[/quote]

You know, I think it's really right for some orders with active apostolates to refer to themselves as 'active-contemplative' or 'contemplative-active.' Believe you me, I used to think something similar about 'the active lifestyle,' until I visited some of these convents! (Panhandle Franciscans who teach, Franciscan Sisters of the Immaculate--who have 3-5+ hours a day of prayer). Their prayer schedules were exhausting! Of course you get used to it, and also when you have the call you have the grace. I'm just saying that they are not necessarily to be sneezed at, at all, in terms of hours of prayer time. Also, without prayer, the life of an active sister would be hollow with nothing really there, no matter how much work she did.

Hope this helps!

[DiscerningSoul]

The Visitations will be celabrating 400 years this year.

[kavalamyself]

Just remember: All will be revealed. Until then, enjoy the mystery that belongs to the Holy Spirit. Abandon yourself!