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Dead Bird And Family Fight


Lil Red

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+J.M.J.+
*sigh*
so this morning, as i'm about to walk out the door to take the kids to my sister-in-law's (she does daycare for us), she calls. she wants my hubby to come up to her house and take a dead bird out to the trash. he is very reluctant, not because he's grossed out, but because he worked 10 p.m. to 6 a.m. and as soon as we left, he was headed for bed. she gets all upset, and so he says he's going to do it.

so as i'm driving to her house, i call him and tell him that i'll take care of it. so i get there and i grab a plastic bag, scoop up the bird in the plastic bag and take it to the alley trash can. i can tell that she's still ticked off though, because she says something like, "i just can't believe he didn't want to come up here!" i try explaining that he's really tired and was on his way to bed. i can see that explanation isn't working, think "oh well" and leave.

fast forward to lunch time. my hubby texts me and forwards a text he got from her husband. it said something like 'when you get up from your precious sleep call your sister and apologize because she does a lot for your family and your kids.' :unsure: uh, okay. so he asks me if he should apologize. i tell him that he should try to explain to her why he didn't want to come up there. he says no, he'll just call and apologize for something that he shouldn't have to. we go back & forth (why don't you tell her the truth? because then she'll just get madder. etc. etc.). he says he'll apologize and tell her to start charging us what she charges other parents for daycare (frankly, that's the only thing i can think of when i hear 'she does so much for your family' - she charges us a reduced rate for the kids) and we won't ask her for another favor again. *sigh* i'm a little peeved at her husband, to tell the truth.

:rolleyes: seriously, his family is so dysfunctional. anyway, keep us in your prayers. i still have to go get the kids in awhile, and i'd rather not get into an argument while i'm there. i don't like confrontation, but if she starts in on my hubby (her brother), i'm afraid my temper will get the best of me.

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homeschoolmom

Okay.... wow.... Um.... where to start?

Your sil was completely out of line to call any of you to take care of this problem for her. Please. that's ridiculous. Unless she's 11, she can handle this all by herself. Get a shovel and do it. IF THAT IS STILL NOT AN OPTION, put a bucket over it and set a rock on top of it and ask you to take care of it when you get there to pick up your kids. IF THAT IS NOT AN OPTION, get on the horn and call DH to take care of this. I cannot envision a scenario that would require a grown, married woman to call her BROTHER to take care of this. Sheesh.

What a baby.

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Wow. SIL is a big enough girl to pickup dead birds if she is big enought o be married and watch kids. Shame on her husband for fanning the flames. She should be thankful you were willing to pick it up.

Bird is in the trash... problem solved.

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[quote name='homeschoolmom' post='1898948' date='Jun 22 2009, 03:53 PM']Okay.... wow.... Um.... where to start?

You sil was completely out of line to call any of you to take care of this problem for her. Please. that's ridiculous. Unless she's 11, she can handle this all by herself. Get a shovel and do it. IF THAT IS STILL NOT AN OPTION, put a bucket over it and set a rock on top of it and ask you to take care of it when you get there to pick up your kids. IF THAT IS NOT AN OPTION, get on the horn and call DH to take care of this. I cannot envision a scenario that would require a grown, married woman to call her BROTHER to take care of this. Sheesh.

What a baby.[/quote]
+J.M.J.+
to be fair, she did call her hubby (at a job site) and two other people before she called my hubby. i just talked to him, and he did call her. she said the reason she was so mad was his attitude about saying no (she says she heard him say, "you've got to be f'in kidding me" - which i know he didn't swear at her because i was standing right there). i don't agree - i mean, he just got off his 8 hour shift (security guard - mostly on his feet), and was in his pj's basically ready to crawl into bed. i'd be cranky too.

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[quote name='VoTeckam' post='1898953' date='Jun 22 2009, 04:01 PM']Wow. SIL is a big enough girl to pickup dead birds if she is big enought o be married and watch kids. Shame on her husband for fanning the flames. She should be thankful you were willing to pick it up.

Bird is in the trash... problem solved.[/quote]
+J.M.J.+
yeah, she did say her hubby shouldn't have intervened (which i totally agree with). my husband's sleep is 'precious' - he gets darned little of it.

i used to have to pick up the dead birds the cat brought home when i lived with my parents. it happens. lol.

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franciscanheart

[quote name='Lil Red' post='1898955' date='Jun 22 2009, 05:02 PM']+J.M.J.+
to be fair, she did call her hubby (at a job site) and two other people before she called my hubby. i just talked to him, and he did call her. she said the reason she was so mad was his attitude about saying no (she says she heard him say, "you've got to be f'in kidding me" - which i know he didn't swear at her because i was standing right there). i don't agree - i mean, he just got off his 8 hour shift (security guard - mostly on his feet), and was in his pj's basically ready to crawl into bed. i'd be cranky too.[/quote]
:mellow:

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homeschoolmom

She is an adult and she called four people to come and pick up a dead bird for her? :mellow:

I wonder if your bil texted the other two people who would not make the trip over to do this demanding apologies from them, too.

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franciscanheart

[quote name='homeschoolmom' post='1898959' date='Jun 22 2009, 05:05 PM']She is an adult and she called four people to come and pick up a dead bird for her? :mellow:

I wonder if your bil texted the other two people who would not make the trip over to do this demanding apologies from them, too.[/quote]
:mellow: no kidding.

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+J.M.J.+
you guys are seriously great :)) you make me feel so much better about the whole thing. :grouphug:

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I think I am most baffled by her husband. I mean the brother/sister relationship is usually a tough one but the cardinal rule of relating to your spouse's family is that you may never tell their family how to treat them. You can council your spouse about how they deserve to be treated and have them initiate the conversation but I feel like this BIL crossed a big line.

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[quote name='VoTeckam' post='1898968' date='Jun 22 2009, 04:10 PM']I think I am most baffled by her husband. I mean the brother/sister relationship is usually a tough one but the cardinal rule of relating to your spouse's family is that you may never tell their family how to treat them. You can council your spouse about how they deserve to be treated and have them initiate the conversation but I feel like this BIL crossed a big line.[/quote]
+J.M.J.+
exactly! like me with my hubby and his sister. i told him how i thought he should handle it, but ultimately said, "whatever you think is best." i didn't call his sister and say "grow up".

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homeschoolmom

[quote name='Lil Red' post='1898969' date='Jun 22 2009, 06:11 PM']i didn't call his sister and say "grow up".[/quote]
But you thought about it, didn't you? :rolleyes:

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Don't worry I will be doing the same thing.

"DIDY!!!! DIDY!!!!"
"WHAT?!?!"
"YOU GOT TO COME OVER AND KILL THIS CENTIPEDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT IS HUGE!"
*click*

Well of course that is if my husband (Whoever and whenever that is) can do it instead.

Actually Didy doesn't kill my centipedes. My other brother does. They are so creepy.

Silliness aside, I agreed with everything said here :))

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[quote name='homeschoolmom' post='1898978' date='Jun 22 2009, 04:22 PM']But you thought about it, didn't you? :rolleyes:[/quote]
+J.M.J.+
would i do that? :mellow:

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