No Vocation?

[HisChild]

I read this thread with much interest. When I left the PCPA in 2006, I was distraught. I'd sold my house, I'd given away all my furniture and belongings... and then after illness had to leave. I felt I had been abandoned by God. Since I'd been in religious life before, with illness there as well a decade earlier, I'd felt like screaming. And did, as a matter of fact.

Then I became petulant. I thought, all right, if I'm not called to be a religious, by golly I'm going to return to the world in style. I bought an expensive car, nice furniture and immersed myself, sometimes not even going to Mass, because after all, if He didn't want me in religious life after all I'd done, perhaps He didn't even want me in His church.

It took me a long time to realize that He wasn't going to stop pursuing me, for whatever will He has for me. I'm allowing myself simply to rest in Him and to allow my vocation, whether it be in the world or not, as a married woman or not, to flourish.

With age comes, hopefully, a little maturity and patience, knowing that God's time is not my time. When I feel like it's taking 'forever' to know what He wants, I just pray, reminding myself that I am exactly where He wants me to be and when it's time for whatever that next step is, whether it be marriage or single or vowed He'll place me in that path. Patience for me truly is a virtue.

No, I'm not looking into religious communities actively. Phooey, where I now live, there aren't any (good) spiritual directors, so I'm not even on that path. I'm just basking in the moment and know when it's time, as He knows my circumstances, He'll make Himself known with the nudges He's famous for in my life.

Keep up with the good fight, dear sister in Christ. He does love you, has a plan for you and will reveal Himself to you when you're meant to know. Know that, in the words of Hannah Hurnard's Good Shepherd from the book Hinds' Feet on High Places: <i>No one, not even your own shrinking heart, can pluck you out of my hand.</i> Amen.

[WisdomSeeker]

[quote name='HisChild' post='1917316' date='Jul 11 2009, 07:52 PM']I read this thread with much interest. When I left the PCPA in 2006, I was distraught. I'd sold my house, I'd given away all my furniture and belongings... and then after illness had to leave. I felt I had been abandoned by God. Since I'd been in religious life before, with illness there as well a decade earlier, I'd felt like screaming. And did, as a matter of fact.

Then I became petulant. I thought, all right, if I'm not called to be a religious, by golly I'm going to return to the world in style. I bought an expensive car, nice furniture and immersed myself, sometimes not even going to Mass, because after all, if He didn't want me in religious life after all I'd done, perhaps He didn't even want me in His church.

It took me a long time to realize that He wasn't going to stop pursuing me, for whatever will He has for me. I'm allowing myself simply to rest in Him and to allow my vocation, whether it be in the world or not, as a married woman or not, to flourish.

With age comes, hopefully, a little maturity and patience, knowing that God's time is not my time. When I feel like it's taking 'forever' to know what He wants, I just pray, reminding myself that I am exactly where He wants me to be and when it's time for whatever that next step is, whether it be marriage or single or vowed He'll place me in that path. Patience for me truly is a virtue.

No, I'm not looking into religious communities actively. Phooey, where I now live, there aren't any (good) spiritual directors, so I'm not even on that path. I'm just basking in the moment and know when it's time, as He knows my circumstances, He'll make Himself known with the nudges He's famous for in my life.

Keep up with the good fight, dear sister in Christ. He does love you, has a plan for you and will reveal Himself to you when you're meant to know. Know that, in the words of Hannah Hurnard's Good Shepherd from the book Hinds' Feet on High Places: <i>No one, not even your own shrinking heart, can pluck you out of my hand.</i> Amen.[/quote]


Thank you I am just taking it one day at a time and seeing where my path leads me.