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How Do You Right All Of The Wrongs From The Past?


XIX

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When my dad was teaching me about how to make decisions, he said to look at all the information you have at the time, and make the best decision you can, on your feet. If you make the right decision, be content with it, and learn from it. If you make the wrong decision, accept responsibility for it, try to make it right or fix it, make amends for it, apologize, and learn from it.

Until we invent a time machine, so we can go back and fix things, we will have to be content to learn from history. My college polisci prof once asked the white students in class what we personally owed to the black students in the class. A number of things were suggested. Finally the professor said, that the students in class only owed to each other their citizenship rights. The sins of the father don't pass to the son (or in my case to the 7th great-grand daughter).

If you are talking about your own past, the only thing you can do is try to make amends where you can, and make a commitment to reorder your life. If you are talking about the church or the country, ordinary people have very little they can actually do about mistakes of the past. We weren't responsible for things like slavery or various wars or the clergy abuse scandal. We can lobby for or vote for changes to prevent future occurrences, but bottom line is that we are all human, and we will make mistakes again.

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You go out of your way to say sorry. Even for hurts from decades ago. I have humbled myself several times to search out people from my past that I have hurt and apologize to them.

It may not fix everything, but it is certainly important for your healing and theirs.

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What CatherineM said - ditto.

Also what Dr. Dobson says: A sin can be forgiven but it can't be undone. The same applies to any kind of wrong, whatever you have in mind. Sometimes the sin/wrong can be repaired (a kid throws a rock through a window - he can say he's sorry, and he can also replace the broken glass), but sometimes it can't (a drunken driver kills a pedestrian - he can say he's sorry, but the pedestrian is still dead and the driver can't replace him like glass). The sin/wrong can be forgiven, but the effects (sometimes) continue.

This sounds a little harsh as I re-read it, but I think Dobson hits the nail on the head. I'm not sure what kind of "wrongs from the past" you're talking about, but you might consider them from this point of view & try to determine if the effects can be repaired or not .... and how.

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Creatures cannot right/write/wright all wrongs.

Can try to lessen them, tho - the others altready said how.


(Catherine, are you a great-grandma?)

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tinytherese

"I worry some of you still have not really met Jesus one-to-one, you and Jesus alone. We may spend time in chapel, but have you seen with the eyes of your soul how he looks at you with love? Do you really know the living Jesus, not from books but from being with him in your heart? Have you heard the loving words he speaks to you? Ask for the grace: he is longing to give it. Until you can hear Jesus in the silence of your own heart, you will not be able to hear him saying "I thirst" in the hearts of the poor. Never give up this daily intimate contact with Jesus as the real living person, not just the idea. How can we last even one day without hearing Jesus say "I love you"? Impossible. Our soul needs that as much as the body needs to breathe the air. If not, prayer is dead, meditation, only thinking. Jesus wants you each to hear him speaking in the silence of your heart. Be careful of all that can block that personal contact with the living Jesus. The devil may try to use the hurts of life, and sometimes our own mistakes, to make you feel it is impossible that Jesus really loves you, is really cleaving to you. This is a danger for all of us. And so sad, because it is completely the opposite of what Jesus is really wanting, waiting to tell you. Not only that he loves you, but even more, he longs for you. He misses you when you don't come close. He thirsts for you. He loves you always, even when you don't feel worthy. When not accepted by others, even by yourself sometimes, he is the one who always accepts you. Only believe, you are precious to him. Bring all you are suffering to his feet; only open your heart to be loved by him as you are. He will do the rest."

Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta

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[quote name='prose' post='1890054' date='Jun 14 2009, 12:42 AM']You go out of your way to say sorry. Even for hurts from decades ago. I have humbled myself several times to search out people from my past that I have hurt and apologize to them.

It may not fix everything, but it is certainly important for your healing and theirs.[/quote]


Prose,

How do you decide when to apologize and when not to?

I realize the question is probably too broad, but yea.

:)
Paddington

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[quote name='Donna' post='1890195' date='Jun 14 2009, 01:38 AM']Creatures cannot right/write/wright all wrongs.

Can try to lessen them, tho - the others altready said how.


(Catherine, are you a great-grandma?)[/quote]

No, and that last I heard neither of my foster sons have become fathers either. I was referencing one of my ancestors who captained a slave ship. Many of my ancestors owned slaves, but being descended from a slaver is a great weight upon me at times. It is one of the dozen reasons that I am so passionate about social justice issues.

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If my ancestors indeed did own slaves, then the descendants of slaves would have to work out a whopper of a payment plan for me.

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[quote name='Paddington' post='1890460' date='Jun 14 2009, 03:22 PM']If my ancestors indeed did own slaves, then the descendants of slaves would have to work out a whopper of a payment plan for me.[/quote]

Yeah, I try to live as good a life as possible hoping to atone some for them. I also understand that with their cultural knowledge at the time, they didn't know what they were doing was wrong, but it still is hard to accept. That's the problem with genealogy research. For every saint you find, expect to find a few sinners too.

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[quote name='Paddington' post='1890431' date='Jun 14 2009, 03:00 PM']Prose,

How do you decide when to apologize and when not to?

I realize the question is probably too broad, but yea.

:)
Paddington[/quote]


For myself? Anyone who I feel I need to ask forgiveness from, I should apologize for. This included a girl I made fun of in highschool (sent her flowers and an apology 10 years later), ex's, and unresolved arguments. Also included, when I am rude to my hubby or children, or anyone else close to me, and when I am (gasp) wrong (it doesn't happen very often)... ;)

I mean, I am not sure if you are referring to major, earth changing wrongs or slavery, but for myself, if my conscience says I need to apologize, in general, I do.

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Groo the Wanderer

[quote name='XIX' post='1890027' date='Jun 13 2009, 10:57 PM']Or can it even be done at all?

Just a super-open question.[/quote]


Nuke em till they glow, then shoot em in the dark?


:dunno:














j/k



WE can't. Christ can.

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[quote name='prose' post='1890486' date='Jun 14 2009, 05:42 PM']For myself? Anyone who I feel I need to ask forgiveness from, I should apologize for. This included a girl I made fun of in highschool (sent her flowers and an apology 10 years later), ex's, and unresolved arguments. Also included, when I am rude to my hubby or children, or anyone else close to me, and when I am (gasp) wrong (it doesn't happen very often)... ;)

I mean, I am not sure if you are referring to major, earth changing wrongs or slavery, but for myself, if my conscience says I need to apologize, in general, I do.[/quote]

Thanks. :) I kinda get it.

I was thinking about me wronging individuals and what to do.

I have no doubt that recent things should be apologized for, but yea.
I gave some apologies in the past that I believed were of my conscience that, on reflection, seem out-of-place.
I don't want to - through my apologies - imply to people that they should or must now apologize for every wrong they have ever inflicted.

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