Pornagraphy, Major Problem

[Callidius]

[quote name='USAirwaysIHS' post='1874650' date='May 24 2009, 11:41 PM']Welcome to Phatmass!
For your own sake, as other have advised, do not preoccupy yourself with these things - in my opinion, the less you know of these things, the better. Myself, like many, many others, found out about these sort of things at your age, and did not have the maturity or presence of mind to avoid them, and they've affected us for the worse. Moreover, once you get into these types of things, it's verrrrry hard to quit, and it's terrible for your well being and your relationship with God.
For your own sake, don't devote much time to these sorts of things - this energy could certainly be used more effectively for good.
I'll be praying for you to retain your innocence for as long as possible.
Pax Christi,
Mitch[/quote]

I'm not actually interested in doing these things [Sinful acts] but rather I am talking about these things AS SIN not that I like them. Sin a hideous abomination of the devil, I'll be praying that me and everyone on here retains there innocence for as long as they live.

[Callidius]

[quote name='HisChildForever' post='1874644' date='May 24 2009, 11:32 PM'][/quote]

what did I do???

Edited May 25, 2009 by Callidius

[Callidius]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' post='1874647' date='May 24 2009, 11:35 PM']The other 5% never say it, but they're thinking it.

.......and out of that 100%, I'd fathom a guess that about 0.000000000001% are correct. [/quote]

1X10-12 in scientific notation

[Vincent Vega]

[quote name='Callidius' post='1874653' date='May 24 2009, 10:47 PM']I'm not actually interested in doing these things [Sinful acts] but rather I am talking about these things AS SIN not that I like them. Sin a hideous abomination of the devil, I'll be praying that me and everyone on here retains there innocence for as long as they live.[/quote]
I realise. However, you've made it clear that you know little about this sort of thing. You're still very young (and I don't mean any of this as being insulting or offensive or anything), and as you mature, you'll find these fun little buggers called hormones make things a little different.
My advice is this - it will be far, far more fruitful and less dangerous to you to turn your mind toward aspiring to holiness and thinking things which are pure than to look back at the devil's snares as a precaution to avoiding them. I promise that being prayerful and thinking about the better side is going to do you much more good than trying to avoid these evils by talking and learning more about them.

[Pauly Walnuts]

[quote name='Callidius' post='1874183' date='May 24 2009, 12:13 AM']It is one of the major problems on the internet and takes some pretty advanced procedures to even just help avoid it. Its everywhere you could search for anything and without the proper protection you will find it. The motives of these "cyber-criminals" is unknown. I personally think these are kids who have not grown up and show complete disregard for morality. It also strips the holiness and dignity from marriage. Here we discuss this issue and how to solve it. I have been exposed to this before and is a GREAT grace not to be exposed to it.[/quote]


I havent read any other posts but this one but, as a person who struggles greatly with this, I just dont know what to do when im so lonely. ( Im am NOT supporting it in any way!!! Hate it a lot )

Edited May 25, 2009 by Pauly Walnuts

[LouisvilleFan]

[quote name='Resurrexi' post='1874593' date='May 24 2009, 11:21 PM']"Chastity is one of those virtues best acquired when thought about as little as possible"[/quote]

I like that... or, one might say, chastity is one of those things found when you quit looking.

[LouisvilleFan]

[quote name='Callidius' post='1874183' date='May 24 2009, 01:13 AM']It is one of the major problems on the internet and takes some pretty advanced procedures to even just help avoid it. Its everywhere you could search for anything and without the proper protection you will find it. The motives of these "cyber-criminals" is unknown. I personally think these are kids who have not grown up and show complete disregard for morality. It also strips the holiness and dignity from marriage. Here we discuss this issue and how to solve it. I have been exposed to this before and is a GREAT grace not to be exposed to it.[/quote]

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

Accountability. Confession. Scripture. Prayer.

...

[Innocent]

[quote name='USAirwaysIHS' post='1874686' date='May 25 2009, 10:51 AM']I realise. However, you've made it clear that you know little about this sort of thing. You're still very young (and I don't mean any of this as being insulting or offensive or anything), and as you mature, you'll find these fun little buggers called hormones make things a little different.
My advice is this - it will be far, far more fruitful and less dangerous to you to turn your mind toward aspiring to holiness and thinking things which are pure than to look back at the devil's snares as a precaution to avoiding them. I promise that being prayerful and thinking about the better side is going to do you much more good than trying to avoid these evils by talking and learning more about them.[/quote]

I second that advice.



Callidius, if you are already struggling with pornography use, it would make sense to discuss the problem of pornography. But since that is not the case, you would be better off focusing on the positive side (i.e., love as a virtue) rather than the side to be avoided (i.e., pornography and various aspects of the problem of pornography.)

It's important to remember that most, if not all, cases of pornography use and addiction start out with simple curiosity* being the first stage. There have been even cases of people helping government agencies to monitor pornography (for the purpose of taking action against pornographers) succumbing to the lure of pornography and becoming consumers of porn themselves. The reason for this is that in spite of our best intentions, we can be unprepared for the intensity of the response of our own biology working against our will, when we have our first exposure to pornography. Our nervous system and hormones are such that it's quite easy for them to powerfully override the will, if the will is unprepared for the serious struggle involved in resisting these strong impulses.

I would suggest, if you have the habit of reading books, reading novels that depict (in a realistic way) virtuous love and marriage. (Some examples are the Jane Austen novels [though there is a general impression that these are not "books for boys," they actually depict relationships based on virtuous love quite well] or books like Little Women and it's sequels. It is true that the societal structure of these books might seem a bit dated at the first read. I'm not aware of any modern novels that are similar to these, perhaps others might know. But if you acquire the taste for it, you can even enjoy the period flavour of its "datedness.")

*[url="http://www.arlingtondiocese.org/documents/0105StagesofAddiction.doc"]Stages of Addiction to Pornography [.doc] [/url]- Document from Arlington Diocese website.

[Galloglasses' Alt]

[quote name='Callidius' post='1874554' date='May 24 2009, 09:17 PM']PS: Are you British?[/quote]
Nein.

Irish. =]

[Callidius]

[quote name='Innocent' post='1874737' date='May 25 2009, 01:45 AM']I second that advice.



Callidius, if you are already struggling with pornography use, it would make sense to discuss the problem of pornography. But since that is not the case, you would be better off focusing on the positive side (i.e., love as a virtue) rather than the side to be avoided (i.e., pornography and various aspects of the problem of pornography.)

It's important to remember that most, if not all, cases of pornography use and addiction start out with simple curiosity* being the first stage. There have been even cases of people helping government agencies to monitor pornography (for the purpose of taking action against pornographers) succumbing to the lure of pornography and becoming consumers of porn themselves. The reason for this is that in spite of our best intentions, we can be unprepared for the intensity of the response of our own biology working against our will, when we have our first exposure to pornography. Our nervous system and hormones are such that it's quite easy for them to powerfully override the will, if the will is unprepared for the serious struggle involved in resisting these strong impulses.

I would suggest, if you have the habit of reading books, reading novels that depict (in a realistic way) virtuous love and marriage. (Some examples are the Jane Austen novels [though there is a general impression that these are not "books for boys," they actually depict relationships based on virtuous love quite well] or books like Little Women and it's sequels. It is true that the societal structure of these books might seem a bit dated at the first read. I'm not aware of any modern novels that are similar to these, perhaps others might know. But if you acquire the taste for it, you can even enjoy the period flavour of its "datedness.")

*[url="http://www.arlingtondiocese.org/documents/0105StagesofAddiction.doc"]Stages of Addiction to Pornography [.doc] [/url]- Document from Arlington Diocese website.[/quote]

I was only exposed to it once be accident. Now I make sure all the filters are maxed out and I am trying to find the prayer you say before connecting to the internet. Good point it doesn't make any sense to look at the dark side of anything because it will end up consuming you and take advantage of you, It would be like cussing a lion pride out but they are still going to eat you. Sorry wasn't thinking to well last night it was like midnight and I missed mass this morning. I haven't read any romance novels but before I read any large (500+ pages) books I am going to take a course on how to speed read, Some people can read so fast that they could read the book for half a second and be able to recite every word in the book (Wow). As for puberty I think i might have it slightly early because I am already growing a mustache and yes some one else said it takes a lot of training to resist these things he jokingly said like the NAVY SEAL.

[Callidius]

Ok How do you delete this thread?

[RemnantRules]

[quote name='Pauly Walnuts' post='1874688' date='May 25 2009, 12:24 AM']I havent read any other posts but this one but, as a person who struggles greatly with this, I just dont know what to do when im so lonely. ( Im am NOT supporting it in any way!!! Hate it a lot )[/quote]

First thing I want to tell you is that it is good that you understand that it is a Sin, and is not bringing you closer to God.

Now that you understand this, here are some things you can do to help you from going down that path:

-TURN IT OFF! If it's your computer, phone, your TV, DVD, iPod, (Close the book if it's a book), and I mean not just close the screen but turn off the power, unplug it if you have to. Your exactly right in that typically people turn to this sin in the cases of loneliness or simply boredom. It is those times when we feel solitude is when Satan likes to sit next beside us and give us temptation.

-LEAVE! Get out of that area. Go find family, friends, neighbors, any human beings in contact. Generally pornography is looked on in a private setting. Call up a friend or a family member you haven't spoken to in a while and catch up with them.

- DO SOMETHING! This ties into what I was just saying. Get up and do something active. Ride a bike, take a walk (and while your walking pray a rosary, chaplet, or personal prayer), jump rope, exercise, play board games, play card games, read a good book, read the Bible, just do something else.

-Pray! St. Bernerd stated, "First the thought. Thought leads to consent, consent leads to action, action leads to committing of the Sin." I may be slightly off, but hopefully you understand what I mean. Other posts on here are right in that we must be EXTREMELY careful when speaking of this nature of sin. As Jason Everett put it in one of his audio's if you tell someone NOT to think of a pink elephant, you of course are going to think of a pink elephant. So I want you to think of Mary and Jesus! There's a beautiful prayer of whenever you feel any sort of temptation just pray the names of Mary and Jesus over and over, and the Devil will flee at those names.

Now, if you are minding your own business and these past sins pop in your head what do you do? Remember, even if you see pornography only once, those images do not go away. They leave an impression on you, and the more you see it the more it will leave that impression. Pornography is the attempt to take what is suppose to be one of the most beautiful things that God has given to us between a married man and woman and disfigure it into an act without emotion or love. Pornography strips away the human person's identity and dignity. Pope John Paul the Great said that the problem with Pornography is that they are not showing too much, but rather they are showing too little. These acts are showing nothing of that person. We do not look at them as brothers and sisters of God, but rather objects for our own pleasure. So, in those times when those sins pop in your head, stop, and offer them to God. Take them with you to the offering of the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. Do you not think that they need those prayers? Of course they do! When we stop and remember that they are the image and likeness of God, we will treat them with all the dignity and respect that they truly deserve, and not as objects. In turn this will only enhance other parts of your life and to be able to conquer the devil in those times when he tries to temp you.

- Other tips:
Put your computer(s) in public places. Yes that means even your laptops if you are using them.
Put Holy things all around your computer and on your desktop. Might I suggest a great Background from Phatmass I personally have the John Paul the Great one on mine. There are plenty of other out there.
Limit your time on the computer if it is your problem. Do no sit on the computer for 8 hours at a time. You are not being productive in your daily life.
If you are a male (and even some females) I would recommend looking into some of Jason Evert's stuff. I purchased his audio collection called, "Pure of Heart". It is a great tool to listen to and get some ideas. You might also want to find out about the Bishop in the Diocese of Kansas City. He is doing a lot of work in fighting these types of sin. I was able to meet him in the summer of 2007 and is a great Shepherd of not just the Diocese of Kansas City, but of our Church as a whole.
Go to confession regularly (and if possible mass daily). You will receive so many graces and the strength to fight this sin! Ask your guardian angel to help you. If you have a patron saint ask for their intercession. If you can find a priest that you feel comfortable with in going to regularly I would recommend that. He will be able to help you along this path of purity and Chastity.
I would HIGHLY recommend anyone that is truly struggling with this type of sin is to find a friend or family member that you can truly trust, and confide in them your struggle. Speak with them as much as you need and always have their name on speed dial to be able to call up at that moment of crisis.
If this is a serious problem on the Internet use, there are websites that can be used to where you can assign another person to be able to see everything that you go to everyday. This is a great tool for accountability and resist the temptation to going to anything that is sinful.
Lastly, if this is truly an addiction, and nothing seems to be helping, you may want to seek professional help in battling this. There are good devout Catholic physicians that deal with these types of addictions.

I will be praying for all those who are going through these struggles. I will leave you all with some saint quotes on Chastity. These were on Jason Everts CD and they are awesome!

God Bless!


Devotion to the Blessed Sacrament and devotion to the Blessed mother isn’t the best way, but the ONLY way to keep purity…Chastity is not possible without the Eucharist.
- St. Philip Neri

To be pure, to remain pure can only come at price. The price of knowing God and loving him enough to do his will. He will always give us the strength to keep purity as something beautiful to him.
- Bl. Mother Theresa

Many live like angels in the middle of the world. you? Why not you?
- St. Jose Maria Escriva

Purity they ask, and they smile They are the ones who go on to marriage with worn out bodies and disillusioned souls.
- St. Jose Maria Escriva

Holy Purity is granted by God when it is asked for with humility.
- St. Jose Maria Escriva

That conversation was dirty as a sewer. It is not enough of you to take no part in it. You must show your repugnance to it strongly. Never talk of impure things or events. Not even to deplore them. Look, it’s a subject that sticks more than tar. Change the conversation, or if that’s not possible continue, but speaking of the need and beauty of holy purity, a virtue of the men who know what their souls are worth. I have never talked about impurity, but I have spoken many times, as I have to do, about Chastity, purity, and the joyful affirmation of love.
- St. Jose Maria Escriva

As soon as you willfully allow a dialogue with temptation to begin, the soul is robbed of peace. Just as consent to impurity destroys grace. Temptation is necessary to make us realize that we are nothing in ourselves. Don’t be such as a coward as to be brave. Flee.
- St. Jose Maria Escriva

To defend his purity St. Francis of Assisi rolled in the snow, St. Benedict threw himself in a thorn bush, St. Bernerd plunged into an icy pond. You? What have you done? Don’t say, “That’s the way. It’s my character.” It’s your lack of character. Be a man! When you decide firmly to lead a clean life chastity will not be a burden to you, it will be a crown of triumph.
- St. Jose Maria Escriva

He did not say you will not be troubled, you will not be tempted, you will not be distressed, but He said you will not be overcome.
- St. Julia of Norwich

To resist every temptation it is sufficient to pronounce the names of Jesus and Mary, and if the temptation continues let us continue to invoke Jesus and Mary, and the Devil shall never be able to conquer us.
-St. Alphonsus Liguori

In your strife with the devil, you have for spectators the angels and the Lord of angels.
- St. Ephrem

God desires the least degree of purity of conscience in you more than all the works you can perform.
- St. John of the Cross

As the pilot of a vessel is tried in the storm as the wrestler is tried in the ring, the soldier in battle, and the hero in the adversity, so is the Christian tried in temptation.
- St. Basil the Great

It is not always in the souls power not to feel a temptation, but it is always in it’s power to consent to it. All the temptations of Hell can not stain a soul that does not love them.
- St. Francis de Sales

In proportion to our victories over these petty foes will be the number of jewels in the crown of glory which God makes ready for us in paradise.
- St. Francis de Sales

The sign of the cross is the most terrible weapon against the devil. Thus the church wishes not only that we should have it continually in front of our minds to recall to us just what our souls are worth, and what they cause Jesus Christ, but also that we should make it at every junction ourselves. When we go to bed, when we awaken during the night, when we get up, when we begin any action, and above all when we are tempted.
- St. John Vianney

Purity prepares the soul for love, and love confirms the soul in purity.
- St. John Henry Cardinal Newman

Holy Purity, the Queen of virtues, angelic virtue is a jewel so precious that those who possess it, become like the angels of God in Heaven, even though clothed in mortal flesh
- ST. John Bosco

Chastity is a long term matter. One must wait patiently for it to bear fruit for the happiness of loving kindness which it must bring, but at the same time Chastity is the sure way to happiness.
- Servant of God John Paul the Great

God has assigned as a duty to every man the dignity to every woman.
- Servant of God John Paul the Great

Deep within yourself listen to your conscience, which calls you to be pure. A home is not warmed by the fire of pleasure, which burns quickly like a pile of withered grass. Passing encounters are only a character of love. They injure hearts, and mock God’s plan.
- Servant of God John Paul the Great

Man can not live without love. He remains a being that is incomprehensible for himself. His life is senseless if love is not revealed to him, if he does not encounter love, if he does not experience it, and make it his own, if he does not participate intimately in it. This is why Christ the Redeemer fully reveals man to himself.
- Servant of God John Paul the Great

More souls go to Hell because of sins of the flesh more than any other reason
- Our Lady of Fatima

Out of the darkness of my life so much frustrated I put before you the one great thing to love on earth, the Blessed Sacrament. There you will find romance, glory, honor, fidelity, and the true way of all of your loves upon earth.
- J.R.R. Tolkien

By Lust I mean that affection of the mind that aims at the adjournment of ones self and ones neighbor without reference to God.
St. Augustine

Filthy talk makes us feel comfortable with filthy action, but the one who knows how to control the tougne is prepared to resist the attacks of Lust.
- St. Clement of Alexandria

[Oliver]

Wow, what a fantastic post ^^^^. Thank you.

[RemnantRules]

Thank You

[Callidius]

No honestly I want this topic deleted