marielapin Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Ok Pham, I'm trying to find a good general info baby book, as well as one that will lay out a good method to get the baby into a regular feeding method after birth - i.e. how to not have a demand-fed baby. Not the cry-it-out method, nor anything that will cause irregular feedings and make the natural breast-feeding cycle kick off, etc. I was recommended Baby Wise but I took one look at it and said no. I've looked at the following books and they are looking more like what I am wanting. But I want some input from you weathered parents as to some good books. Gentle Baby Care : No-cry, No-fuss, No-worry--Essential Tips for Raising Your Baby by Elizabeth Pantley, Harvey Karp [url="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0071398856/102-1302968-4949761?%5Fencoding=UTF8&coliid=I23S7D5YBFTIIJ&colid=1M1R731H70862"]http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detai...d=1M1R731H70862[/url] Your Newborn: Head to Toe: Everything You Want to Know About Your Baby's Health through The First Year by Cara Familian Natterson (Author) [url="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0316739138/102-1302968-4949761?%5Fencoding=UTF8&coliid=I1UTFUJ3LZ12OR&colid=1M1R731H70862"]http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detai...d=1M1R731H70862[/url] Like I said, I plan on breast-feeding, so I want to keep the baby on a regular schedule and not go on 6+ hour breaks during the night. I also haven't been around really small babies for a while so I just need a good reference book. Recommendations will be most appreciated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marielapin Posted March 18, 2004 Author Share Posted March 18, 2004 no one? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 we should have a mommies meeting at the Phatmass Ladies Yahoo Group!!! that way we can ask everyone!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theoketos Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 Just for background... I am getting married in a year or so. I am really good at helping with the whole NFP thing. I love it! I looking forward with great anticipation to new life... So my question is what about the family bed thing. It used to freak me out, but I have some respectable stuff and trying to form and informed opinon. Is it good, I would like to read actual studies on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theoketos Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 Oh yeah, and something called the couple to couple League puts out great literature. [url="http://www.ccli.org/"]http://www.ccli.org/[/url] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 Okay, here's my 2 little copper coins worth... This is my third baby... I don't read any books (but I really didn't before either). Sweet Baby John eats when he's hungry. I have no idea how often that is... he's a snacker. He's six months old and hasn't taken a bottle (although I never pushed too hard). I have the very nice pleasure of being with him all the time and it is not a burden for me. He is now on solids a little so that helps if I have to leave him for a few hours. As for the family bed... we do that only because it works for us... not because of any philosophical ideals... SBJ starts out the evening in his crib (around ten), but around one he wakes up and gets moved into our bed. He nurses, we both sleep... he wakes up again around five, he nurses, we both sleep. Don't know if this was helpful... None of my babies was on a schedule, so I am sure this was not what you were looking for.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 What to Expect the First Year is a pretty basic book for baby care. That one I do look at. It came in handy when SBJ had the chicken pox last month!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom25angels Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 OK I'm responding, here's my two cents. I've looked at my baby books, it seems they are all either "schedule and cry it out" or "feed on demand". My advice is this read all sorts of books, the more you read now the better. However it's hard to decide on a "feeding style" until you've met your little one. They are all sooooo different. I know people who say their babies thrive on a schedule and those who just freak out if you mention a schedule. You'll have to figure it out as you go along. In my experience, to best meet the needs of your child you should feed on demand, esp at first. It will build your milk supply up so much quicker and then help alleviate engorgement when that happens. Quite honestly I've found that babies will find their own natural schedule on their own if you "meet them halfway". The BEST breastfeeding book I've ever owned is by far LaLeche League's Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. It's def. of the feed on demand variety but it answers any and every breastfeeding question out there. It is great to have on hand even if you don't feed on demand. Hope that helps. Sarah ps---the more you breastfeed the longer it takes to get your fertility back I don't have any cycles for at least a year and I know one mother who averages 24months. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kilroy the Ninja Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 If you're planning on breast feeding my advice is to find out about Le Leche League in your area. (They're everwhere!) They will have the best info and support on breast feeding available. We used the every two hours (mostly) schedule for a couple of weeks and then delved into the on-demand schedule which worked out fine. I found it made for a happier baby. And a happier mommy. But I'm not sure that there is just one book. Read as many as you can get a hold of and pick and choose the info you like. You are the only one who can make a schedule best for you and baby... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azriel Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 I so agree with Kilroy, but darlin, you're little one is the one who will help you decide what's best. And as much as you think you can prepare, you can't. You really can't. As far as a schedule ... a breastfed baby eats more often then formula fed. So you may find yourself feeding every 2-3 hours even after the first couple of weeks. I still am, and Dani is almost 3 mos old. And be grateful if he sleeps several hours in a row at night. Trust me on this one! I read "The Complete Book of Breastfeeding" (sent to me by an awesome phatmasser!)....if its agreeable to that person, I'll pass it on to you if you'd like. I think I have it memorized. 2 other awesome resources are the La Leche League website, and the book "what to expect during the first year" (forewarned its not exactly all Catholic friendly, but still has some great info). And you are right about Baby Wise. Blah. I was given it and quickly shelved it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 Dearie, there is one important detail somebody forgot to tell you. The baby sets the schedule, not you. You are bringing a unique little individual into your household. Would you tell an important household guest when they may or may not eat? Your schedule, to a large extent, is set by the child. They know what they need. Sometimes the baby will want to nurse for long periods. This usually means the munchkin is getting ready for a growth spurt, and is increasing your milk supply. You won't know this in advance, so if you are trying to regulate the feedings, a schedule could be more of a hindrance than a help. If the baby is in the same bed with you, you both will get a lot more sleep, and both be happier, more pleasant people. Humans are not meant to sleep alone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azriel Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 [quote name='cmotherofpirl' date='Mar 18 2004, 07:48 AM'] Dearie, there is one important detail somebody forgot to tell you. The baby sets the schedule, not you. You are bringing a unique little individual into your household. Would you tell an important household guest when they may or may not eat? Your schedule, to a large extent, is set by the child. They know what they need. Sometimes the baby will want to nurse for long periods. This usually means the munchkin is getting ready for a growth spurt, and is increasing your milk supply. You won't know this in advance, so if you are trying to regulate the feedings, a schedule could be more of a hindrance than a help. If the baby is in the same bed with you, you both will get a lot more sleep, and both be happier, more pleasant people. Humans are not meant to sleep alone. [/quote] That's why Mom knows best! Dani does sleep with us in the earlier morning hours, and it means mom gets more sleep! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marielapin Posted March 18, 2004 Author Share Posted March 18, 2004 [quote name='cmotherofpirl' date='Mar 18 2004, 08:48 AM'] Dearie, there is one important detail somebody forgot to tell you. The baby sets the schedule, not you. You are bringing a unique little individual into your household. Would you tell an important household guest when they may or may not eat? Your schedule, to a large extent, is set by the child. They know what they need. Sometimes the baby will want to nurse for long periods. This usually means the munchkin is getting ready for a growth spurt, and is increasing your milk supply. You won't know this in advance, so if you are trying to regulate the feedings, a schedule could be more of a hindrance than a help. If the baby is in the same bed with you, you both will get a lot more sleep, and both be happier, more pleasant people. Humans are not meant to sleep alone. [/quote] Thanks cmom. This is pretty much what I thought. I'm not going to starve the baby just to set some schedule that is more convient for me...that is pretty much what I'm trying to avoid. But being the nerdy engineer I am, it is impossible for me to sit back and not prepare. After all, I am one of those people who "studied" for the SAT, when everyone says you can't study for it. I'm also not one of those people who think they can know everything before the baby is born. I am realistic in that regard, but I still crave knowledge. I need to be talking to my mother-in-law more about baby advice. Unfortunately, my mom is not really into giving me advice until after that stage is over. So being here by myself without family to help support is a little difficult. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 I know, I read every book I could to cover every aspect of childrearing. Forewarned is forearmed, right?. But you will discover your baby will be your best teacher. The hardest thing is getting over the idea you are in charge of your day. If the baby is having a good day, hurray - you get to do the dishes. If the baby is having a bad day, wow, you get to go to the bathroom yourself, maybe. The kicker is when you have another baby all bets are off, because you are starting over with another unique individual, and all the stuff that worked the first time, does not necessarily work with the second. Enjoy! You are starting the greatest adventure in life! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted March 18, 2004 Share Posted March 18, 2004 [quote name='cmotherofpirl' date='Mar 18 2004, 10:50 AM'] I know, I read every book I could to cover every aspect of childrearing. Forewarned is forearmed, right?. But you will discover your baby will be your best teacher. The hardest thing is getting over the idea you are in charge of your day. If the baby is having a good day, hurray - you get to do the dishes. If the baby is having a bad day, wow, you get to go to the bathroom yourself, maybe. The kicker is when you have another baby all bets are off, because you are starting over with another unique individual, and all the stuff that worked the first time, does not necessarily work with the second. Enjoy! You are starting the greatest adventure in life! [/quote] Amen, Cmom... And just when you think you have figured out your baby's schedule, he changes it. But you'll figure it out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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