Spiritual Director?

[fiat2]

I'm going to go to college at Franciscan University of Steubenville, and I live in NH, so I will only be coming home for holiday/holyday vacations. thanks for all the great advice guys. more later....

[Sister Rose Therese]

I think If you can find a good spiritual director it would be great. They aren't always easy to find. Not all priests are very experienced in spiritual direction, and sometimes even though they are good directors they may be the right one for you personally. If you have questions or are in need of guidance you can go to your confessor.
If you are going to Steubenville, you should be able to find a priest who is trained as a spiritual director and who is used to working with young people.
Normally a session of spiritual direction wouldn't last much longer than an hour and most people meet with there spiritual directors about once a month. Priest especially don't have time to do much more than that.
When you get more in the practice of mental prayer, you would probably have more to talk about. If you are not already doing mental prayer, meditation, that might be something you should try to start. It is hard to really build your relationship with the Lord without that.

[puellapaschalis]

[quote name='A Yearning Heart' post='1585508' date='Jun 28 2008, 02:28 PM']I don't have a sd, so please excuse the question. I was just thinking though, after reading these posts, what does a person talk about? and why does it last for hours or half a day?
I am seriously thinking of trying to get a sd.[/quote]

At our first appt we introduced ourselves (and actually he talked about himself nearly - nearly, for I am a right chatterbox - as much as I did): introductions, talking about how we ended up where we are now. From then points just came up which we could both identify as being things that...well, if I say "I need to work on" it makes it sound like therapy, which it isn't.

It's more like he's a holy priest who seems to know the right questions to ask.

All I can do in return is keep him in my prayers every day, and send him a card each year on the anniversary of his priestly ordination

[DiscerningSoul]

[quote name='johnnydigit' post='1585483' date='Jun 28 2008, 06:32 AM']wouldn't it be better to confess to your SD so they can better understand where you are? i guess it depends on the type of guidance you seek..[/quote]

I love my SD, however sometimes its hard to get ahold of him, now that he isn't saying Mass at the churches I go to.

[Fr. Antony Maria OSB]

I had a spiritual director for the four years I was in high-school (just graduated), and now since I'm going off to college in another state my sd and I talked about ways to find a good sd, since I'm going to (hopefully) find another one at my college. The first thing my sd told me was make sure that he has a love of the Mass. My sd is a priest, and I'm going to try to find another priest for my second sd, so he was referring to saying Mass, but I'm sure the same would go for a nun or experienced lay person. After that he just told me to pray about it, that God would direct me, and to wait about a quarter or so to get a feel of who would make a good sd.

As to how I first met my sd, he was the student chaplain, so he would say Mass for the students everyday, and so one day after Mass I just asked him if we could talk after school and it went on from there. We talked about a wide range of things, to be honest: prayer life, different experiences I had, etc. I asked him once if our talks were spiritual direction and he said they were a mix between spiritual direction and pastoral counceling, so yeah. But I would definately say spiritual direction is essential: I know that my relationship with God would not be what it is today if it wasn't for my sd.

May God bless and protect you always in all of your endeavors, especially your discernment!

Your Brother in Christ,

Joe

[Brigid]

I would love having a spiritual director! I had a friend who probably would have been mine, but she moved right as I was starting to talk to her more... I hope I'll be able to get one in the future.

I might ask one of my parish priests, but they're both super busy. and it would be awkward. I would much rather have a female...

[puellapaschalis]

[quote name='Brigid' post='1586070' date='Jun 29 2008, 07:58 AM']I might ask one of my parish priests, but they're both super busy. and it would be awkward.[/quote]

I had the same concerns when I asked my sd - he's a priest in the North of the Netherlands (we have about 30 priests for more than 80 parishes). After I had asked him I went to a friend and talked about it, and he said to me, "Priests see these things as a reward more than a burden. As long as you don't go behaving like a Frisian parish council, you'll be fine!"

A couple of times I've actually asked my sd if meeting with me isn't yet another straw on his back. He replied that no matter how much of his time and energy it may take, helping someone who is Catholic and who wants to be more Catholic to actually become yet more Catholic is something he'd always want to do. And that if more people asked him he'd think it were brilliant.

There will often be practical constraints. But don't let them stop you at least asking. In Dutch we say: niet schieten is altijd mis. Not to shoot is to always miss (the target).

[shortnun]

We've had a number of topics lately about Spiritual Directors (even how to find ones nearby to you). I highly recommend one, just from my experience it's been really helpful. And a quick search here will give you all the recent threads!

[franciscanheart]

very necessary!!

[praying4carmel]

I could not have done my walk without my SD. She Helped me stay grounded on my Journey, to keep and open mind, and to really Listen to the Spirit.

It helped me alot that she was a Sister; it really gave me insight as she is 45 years young and has been a Sister for over 22 years.

[johnnydigit]

[quote name='Brigid' post='1586070' date='Jun 28 2008, 10:58 PM']I might ask one of my parish priests, but they're both super busy. and it would be awkward. I would much rather have a female...[/quote]

you never know. when i asked, i was pretty sure he would say he was too busy, but he just whipped out his calendar book and asked, "what day is good for you?" plus you gotta start somewhere, and it's the perfect opportunity to show God that you are ready to just try. who knows, he may be perfect for you, or he may be the first step into finding the perfect one. he can give you recommendations and give you the experience you need to find one. =)

[Domine ut Videam]

It is essential. I had one during High School. Then last year (which was my first year at college, 7 hrs away from home) I didn't have one. As a result, I definitely noticed a change in my relationship w/God and my spiritual life. As a result, next year I am getting back on track and have already lined up a SD.

SD's are helpful because they view your life with and objective eye and one that cares first and foremost about your holiness and/or discernment. Also, I find it helpful to have a SD who is also my confessor because then when I go to confession they are more knowledgable about my struggles and vices, etc...

Anyways, all who are seeking a SD will definitley be in my prayers. Good Luck! And as was said, most priests would love it if you asked them, so just give it a shot!

Totus Tuus Maria!

Edited July 1, 2008 by Domine ut Videam