Lurking For A Few Weeks On Vs

[praying4carmel]

Sorry folks,

I have been lurking on VS since I got back from my trips to Carmel of Cleveland as well as to the Benedictines of Rock Island.

I just have not been in a place to put my self out on the Public forum, as I have been actively sitting and listening to what I believe the Lord is asking me to do. I am not comparing my Discernment Journey with anyone else's as we all have such different journeys. I say this at the outset, because I do not want to be perceived as "Self Righteous" as I explain my journey's conumdrums.

Carmel and the Benedictines both fit aspects of my Personality which is what is making the decision so difficult. It is not a matter of, for me, liking one monastery over another, or Charism, or where I fit in. I wish it was as easy as saying I liked a certain Habit, for those of you who are Habit Fans. I don't mean that in a sarcastic way, it just is that the Habit is used by some as a discernment item. And that's fine with me. It is a Major issue of Discernment for those who are so inclined. For me, and ONLY ME, what my Primary Directive has been is Listening to find our where HE wants me, where I can do the most good. Consequently in this process, I have spoken with Many people, in writing etc to gather information. I have come down to these 2 above mentioned Monasteries, which I have lived in and I can honestly say, that as much of a Carmelite that I am, and How deeply I am in Love with the Carmelite Charism, and especially the Cleveland Carmelites, that it is coming down for me to an examination of both Rules. I could close my eyes and Live in Both places, easily. Both Prioresses suggested the Ben Franklin lists of pros and cons, and nothing sticks out but the Rule. This suprises and amazes me at the same time.

Both Monasteries are beautiful with Loving women who are deeply in love with the Church, have deep spiritualities, are balanced psychcologically and support the parts of my journey that have led me to each of them. Both Know that this is out of their hands and that it is Christ's decision as to where I will go. Both understand my Conumdrum, and have never tried to influence me or discourage me against the other monastery or charism. Both have been Unconditionally Loving to me, and extraodinarily wonderful hosts.

So, I pray now for enlightenment, and a clear sense of direction.

Thank you to all of you who have kept me in your prayers. I deeply appreciate it.

Also, Indpls Carmel celebrated Closing Mass last Saturday. 2 Cleveland Sisters were there. The Sisters of Indpls are on their way to Oldenburg. May they be Blessed in their new location.

Peace,
+
Nancy

[Sister Rose Therese]

God bless you Nancy.
I'll pray for you as you complete your discernment.

[praxedes]

Dear Nancy,
May God bless and hold you. Thank you for sharing your discernment with us, and know that you are truly held in prayer.
A beautiful part of our Faith is that we can experience multiple attractions, desires and peace in different ways. We are human, and in that, we experience growth at all times (hopefully!) and as we go deeper, we are apt to surprise ourselves!
Wherever you go; you will be graced and loved, and all will be well.
My sincere prayers are with you!
Praxedes

[DameAgnes]

Nancy - you are in my prayers as you discern. May the Lord guide you through his Word, and through the work of his servants who came before you.

[alicemary]

How wonderful is the will of the Lord, and for you, your journey. His ways are often shrouded in a type of fog, but eventually it will lift and you will see the right path for you to take. Sounds like you are well on your way!!! Our prayers join yours and your level headedness is a blessing!!!

[Maria Faustina]

I'll be praying for you. God Bless!

[Graciela]

"Both Prioresses suggested the Ben Franklin lists of pros and cons, and nothing sticks out but the Rule. This suprises and amazes me at the same time."

Dear Nancy-

This comes with prayers for your discernment and also with great awe and appreciation for the sincerity, thoughtfulness and maturity of your approach to this process.

May I ask whether the difference in apostolic activities makes a difference between these two communities for your considerations about the Rule of St Benedict and that of St Albert?

Praise God for the Spirit's activity in your life and your discernment!

Grace & peace-
Graciela

[shortnun]

May the Holy Spirit enlighten you and guide you on your path.

We're praying with and for you!!!

[Stacey]

St Therese went to a Benedictine school and apparently always wore the Benedictine medal under her habit so she managed to combine both in her own way. There is a wonderful book out called St Benedict and St Therese by Dwight Longenecker that you might find interesting. I can't put it down it's brilliant. You can order it online through Ampleforth abbey though i am sure you can find it other places too. I felt i should be Benedictine despite a strong draw to Carmel.
I wish you well in your discernment, it's not easy so be gentle with yourself, peace and prayer, Sr Marie Therese.

[Maria Faustina]

[quote name='Stacey' post='1584584' date='Jun 27 2008, 06:03 AM']St Therese went to a Benedictine school and apparently always wore the Benedictine medal under her habit so she managed to combine both in her own way. There is a wonderful book out called St Benedict and St Therese by Dwight Longenecker that you might find interesting. I can't put it down it's brilliant. You can order it online through Ampleforth abbey though i am sure you can find it other places too. I felt i should be Benedictine despite a strong draw to Carmel.
I wish you well in your discernment, it's not easy so be gentle with yourself, peace and prayer, Sr Marie Therese.[/quote]


Dwight Longenecker is a priest at my parish! He is a really good writer and you should definetly read his books!

[johnnydigit]

so many different people, so many different stories, different conundrums. a very diverse discernment world it is.. like a big web or puzzle that fits perfectly together. different charisms, different personalities.. a growing tree of life. it is truly remarkable and inspiring.

prayers!

[praying4carmel]

[quote name='Graciela' post='1584245' date='Jun 26 2008, 10:42 PM']"Both Prioresses suggested the Ben Franklin lists of pros and cons, and nothing sticks out but the Rule. This suprises and amazes me at the same time."

Dear Nancy-

This comes with prayers for your discernment and also with great awe and appreciation for the sincerity, thoughtfulness and maturity of your approach to this process.

May I ask whether the difference in apostolic activities makes a difference between these two communities for your considerations about the Rule of St Benedict and that of St Albert?

Praise God for the Spirit's activity in your life and your discernment!

Grace & peace-
Graciela[/quote]

Graciela

Thank you for your Kindness! As well as a good question!

I had originally thought at the beginning of this journey that the Benedictines might be "too busy" for me. I do certainly feel that would have been the case years ago when they were running their School in Nauvoo Il. However, now their focus is on their retreat ministries, spiritual direction etc. Monastery is cloistered but not enclosed like the Carmelites. They do pray the Liturgy of the Hours 3 times a day as well. So, from what I have seen there the Sisters have a good Balance in prayer and activity. They are not as active as an "active" order is, However, Many sisters do work in Diocesan offices, churches, and colleges. The Carmelites also do Diocesan work, However all their work is brought to the Monastery and out of the Monastery by Courier. Some of the Sisters do Spiritual Direction, However, the person comes to the Monastery for it.

So that is the difference in activity. In other words, I am not seeing alot of activity on the Part of the Benedictines that makes them lose their focus of prayer. They Follow the Rule beautifully, with a terrific balance of work and prayer.

I am also attracted by the Possibliitywith The Benedictines of obtaining my Master's in SD and running retreats working with Recovering Alcoholic and Substance abuse women, but will only do that if the Lord is leading me to do it.

What I am trying to do now is Let go and Let God. I have turned it over and am praying lightly. I am trying Not to Grind up about it, and am reading some Science Fiction to keep my Mind Off this decision. I am confident that I will get a sign as to where I am supposed to be. Sometimes, I have a terrific Ego and I can be quite arrogant as to where I think I am going and what I am going to do. That is why I am working with an SD. It IS quite HARD for me NOT to make a decision here and now. I WANT TO...Screams sometimes quite Loudly. But the Voice of the Lord is Quiet and I must Listen. I am grateful to just Know that I have a Vocation! Whatever the Lord wants is fine with me, and that Will make me happy; no matter how much my Ego's protests to the contrary.

In a way I feel Discernment, not matter Lay, Diocesan , Cloistered Active etc is really the Last stand of the Ego. There is a reason as to why Christ faced Gethsemane, alone. I used to think the Disciples were Jerks for falling asleep, But now I know and Understand why this Journey comes to a Point where you make it alone. It can't BE any other way.

Hope this answers your Question!
+
Nancy

[praying4carmel]

[quote name='johnnydigit' post='1585351' date='Jun 27 2008, 11:56 PM']so many different people, so many different stories, different conundrums. a very diverse discernment world it is.. like a big web or puzzle that fits perfectly together. different charisms, different personalities.. a growing tree of life. it is truly remarkable and inspiring.

prayers![/quote]

Thanks so Much!

[praying4carmel]

[quote name='Stacey' post='1584584' date='Jun 27 2008, 07:03 AM']St Therese went to a Benedictine school and apparently always wore the Benedictine medal under her habit so she managed to combine both in her own way. There is a wonderful book out called St Benedict and St Therese by Dwight Longenecker that you might find interesting. I can't put it down it's brilliant. You can order it online through Ampleforth abbey though i am sure you can find it other places too. I felt i should be Benedictine despite a strong draw to Carmel.
I wish you well in your discernment, it's not easy so be gentle with yourself, peace and prayer, Sr Marie Therese.[/quote]

I saw that Book and I am Ordering it Today!!

Thanks!
+
Nancy

[praying4carmel]

[quote name='Maria Faustina' post='1584727' date='Jun 27 2008, 01:13 PM']Dwight Longenecker is a priest at my parish! He is a really good writer and you should definetly read his books![/quote]


That's exciting! I will read it!