Parents And Drinking

[Pontifite 7 of 10]

My parents drink in forn of me all the time, not all the time, that makes them sound irresponcible. They arn't. On occasion, they drink with my aunts, uncles, and their friends. But just because they drink doesn't mean I want to also. I'm my own person and I don't think they influenced me to want to. If I choose to drink, its not my parents fault. People need to stop blaming things on "influences" and people need to take responcibility for their actions, me thinks.

[fides quarens intellectum]

[quote name='Pontifite 7 of 10' post='1563857' date='Jun 8 2008, 09:09 PM']I'm my own person and I don't think they influenced me to want to. If I choose to drink, its not my parents fault. People need to stop blaming things on "influences" and people need to take responcibility for their actions, me thinks.[/quote]

well said.

[picchick]

[quote name='Norseman82' post='1563392' date='Jun 8 2008, 01:22 PM']Co?

Jak tam idzie, pani?

Pytanie: ja czytałem twoich posty tutaj; czy Didymus jest twój brat?[/quote]
Tak, Mój brat jest Didymus. My mieliśmy mówić język polski stale.


Everyone is speaking of responsibility....

I am wondering if I missed something in that article. Are the speaking about teenage drinking or the adults drinkers and their parent's affect on their current drinking habits.

Teenagers are not ready to accept full responsibility for their actions. It is the time where they are given the opportunity to make mistakes and learn from them. However, they believe they are invincible. Nothing can hurt them. Therefore, they cannot be held fully accountable. Their parents are partly responsible for keeping up with them and checking in on them.

[Faith 1st]

The only thing that I remember about my real dad was that he was always drunk and abusive! My step dad drank a lot too, but was never out of controll (I think). ***He has been sober for 4 years***

I started drinking really young and abused it because I was always trying to run away from things that I had to confront. Now that I am older and wiser I want my children to know that you can drink socially and be ok.

I always tell them that when they are of age it is ok to have a drink if they are responsible about it.

[MissScripture]

[quote name='picchick' post='1564236' date='Jun 8 2008, 11:42 PM']Tak, Mój brat jest Didymus. My mieliśmy mówić język polski stale.
Everyone is speaking of responsibility....

I am wondering if I missed something in that article. Are the speaking about teenage drinking or the adults drinkers and their parent's affect on their current drinking habits.

Teenagers are not ready to accept full responsibility for their actions. It is the time where they are given the opportunity to make mistakes and learn from them. However, they believe they are invincible. Nothing can hurt them. Therefore, they cannot be held fully accountable. Their parents are partly responsible for keeping up with them and checking in on them.[/quote]
I think that Ponti was saying that parents should be responsible, but regardless of if they are, if he starts drinking he can't just blame it on his parents.
I see what you're saying, and I think what you and he are saying actually fits together, because the teens SHOULD take responsibility for what they're doing, but the parents need to be responsible, too.

[picchick]

[quote name='MissScripture' post='1564601' date='Jun 9 2008, 11:33 AM']I think that Ponti was saying that parents should be responsible, but regardless of if they are, if he starts drinking he can't just blame it on his parents.
I see what you're saying, and I think what you and he are saying actually fits together, because the teens SHOULD take responsibility for what they're doing, but the parents need to be responsible, too.[/quote]


ah ok.....I see Thanks, I thought he was referring to no blame on the parents if the kids were teens. I understand now

Edited June 9, 2008 by picchick

[Deb]

My parents never drank except wine at Christmas. My parents never smoked. My parents never swore. My parents never did drugs. My parents were virgins until their wedding night.

I did not follow my parents in any virtuous area of their life. I think that my peers were more influencial on my behavior when I hit my teen years than my parents were.

My parents gave me a proper Catholic uptight authoritarian upbringing, all hell and damnation. I figured out that I was already damned by the time I was sixteen so I just decided to ride with it.

I don't really drink at all anymore. I do believe in one of the examination of conscience things I was reading it asked if you got drunk on purpose. That was considered a sin.

[Lord Philip]

[quote name='Lil Red' post='1562206' date='Jun 7 2008, 08:02 AM']+J.M.J.+
there was an interest article today in my paper about the fact that my state's students' drinking has increased from 2005 (among 12-20 year olds).

to quote:

as a parent, i always thought it was my responsibility to model appropriate alcoholic consumption, but this article has me thinking. what are your thoughts?[/quote]

Arguments against alcohol sound very convincing in our unconscious American puritanical fundamentalism, but if we take these arguments out to their conclusions, then we reach absolute absurdity.

"Alcohol kills people, so alcohol is bad and should never be drunk."

Sure, it really does kill people. People who abuse alcohol are in a terrible situation and need help.

Now let us take this argument to its conclusion: cholesterol kills people. In fact, it kills a heck of a lot more people than alcohol or smoking. It is addictive. Gluttony is no small problem in Western society. If the argument against alcohol holds, then it holds a hundred times more weight when applied to cholesterol.

Therefore it is now evil to eat beef, bacon, ice cream, milk, pork, chicken, fish, cream, butter, lamb, and a host of other foods. It is 100 times more evil to EVER eat ANY of these things than it is to drink some alcohol.

As a matter of fact, fat, sugar, and complex carbohydrates contribute right along with cholesterol to high rates of mortality. This means no more apples, strawberries, candy, vinegar, chocolate, bread, cake, grapes, cereal, peaches, watermelon, tortillas, corn, rice, barley, soda, bananas, olive oil, or pastries. These foods are all evil because they kill people. They kill more people than alcohol.

All that one can now eat under this puritanical system are beans boiled in water (but no salt...salt causes high blood pressure and is therefore evil), some brussels sprouts, and perhaps some lettuce. One will have to go to confession after eating these, however, because these foods still contain their own natural salts, sugars, and fats.

Reductio ad absurdum, done.

God gave us all these delicious foods to give us pleasure. There is no other justification needed for them. We are to joyfully and thankfully eat them in moderation. He also gave us beer, wine and spirits to add some spice and enjoyment to our lives. We are to enjoy these things with thanksgiving and in moderation.

If you do not teach your children to have moderation in eating ice cream, french fries and hamburgers, then your children will be obese and may die at a young age of a heart attack.

Even if you do teach them they may not listen. Does this mean that you eat only beans and brussels sprouts? Of course not. You set a good example and you try your darndest to instill those values in your children.

Same with alcohol. Don't let the puritan heretics take all your joy away from you. It is bad enough than they have quelled their own without stamping it out of everyone else.

This is common sense, people, and I have NEVER heard a good argument in refutation of this.

God bless,

Philip

[LouisvilleFan]

What he said.

Also, there's no connection between drinking and Russian roulette.

I think we should also avoid teaching people the Bible. After all, it's like playing Russian roulette, only the empty chambers are those who learn to read the Bible as you teach them (in context of Tradition, history, etc.) and the bullets are those who will abuse Scripture to go out and start a little cult.

I guess the Catholic Church has been on to something all these years... (just kidding).

Frankly, that any one becomes an alcoholic or abuses alcohol has little to do with what their parents taught them about drinking and a whole lot to do with their self-confidence and pscyhological well-being. Some people are brought up in complete abstinence and have no desire to drink or they learn to drink responsibly. Others start having a beer with dad at age 12 and they grow up just fine too. The abusers, however, have one thing in common: that they've got issues they choose to ignore (and some just want to party and have fun... that's a different case). It's a lot easier to focus on the "what," but doing so doesn't address the "why" that's the root cause.

I for one was not raised with any particular example of responsible or irresponsible drinking and was too shy in high school to break the rules. But after turning 21, suffice to say I made up for lost time. Fortunately, I enjoy alcohol too much to be an alcoholic.

Edited June 10, 2008 by LouisvilleFan

[rckllnknny]

i always told my oldest kid not to drink. at least not until he's older. then when hes older (above the age of 21) still, dont drink. but if you do, dont drive. call a cab, call a limo.
and i told him, but still, dont drink. then i told him in life there are things called courtesy drinks. if youre in a situation where you are invited to drink and you dont want to be disrespectful, there is a courtesy drink..one..two, at the most. but still dont drink. i dont like drinking in front of my kids. it makes me feel guilty even if im being responsible. but still...dont drink.


i like the quote above me ...fortunately i enjoy drinking to much to be an alcoholic.

Edited June 18, 2008 by rckllnknny

[Lord Philip]

[quote name='rckllnknny' post='1574955' date='Jun 18 2008, 08:47 AM']i always told my oldest kid not to drink. at least not until he's older. then when hes older (above the age of 21) still, dont drink. but if you do, dont drive. call a cab, call a limo.
and i told him, but still, dont drink. then i told him in life there are things called courtesy drinks. if youre in a situation where you are invited to drink and you dont want to be disrespectful, there is a courtesy drink..one..two, at the most. but still dont drink. i dont like drinking in front of my kids. it makes me feel guilty even if im being responsible. but still...dont drink.
i like the quote above me ...fortunately i enjoy drinking to much to be an alcoholic. [/quote]

Rckllnknny,

I would be curious to know what your response would be to my post (the second above yours).

Why do you allow unchristian, unbiblical laws bind up your joy and terrorize your spirit with guilt?

[rckllnknny]

[quote name='Lord Philip' post='1575042' date='Jun 18 2008, 12:45 PM']Rckllnknny,

I would be curious to know what your response would be to my post (the second above yours).

Why do you allow unchristian, unbiblical laws bind up your joy and terrorize your spirit with guilt?[/quote]


i dont. 'moderation', if not (preferrably) complete abstinence from alcohol, is being highly responsible. hence, my post also.

Edited June 25, 2008 by rckllnknny

[Lord Philip]

[quote name='rckllnknny' post='1583261' date='Jun 25 2008, 04:43 PM']i dont. 'moderation', if not (preferrably) complete abstinence from alcohol, is being highly responsible. hence, my post also.[/quote]

You didn't answer my question. You just restated your argument by asserting the premise that complete abstinence is preferable (and hence better in a universal sense) than moderation.

My question to you is why is abstinence universally "better"? I don't think it is better at all, especially when motivated by unchristian, puritanical lies.

Please answer the argument.

[rckllnknny]

define specifically your meaning of my unchristian, unbiblical, puritanical lies.
also elaborate your references to my guilt.
and please, if you would, entertain the clarification on to which precisely provoking opposing stance it is in which you wish incline?

[rckllnknny]

i would attempt to offer you why i hold personal regards to my parental responsibilities and obligations. but it seems obviously rhetorically you wish to insinuate a narrow sided debate
which i will probably politely decline due to responsible nature of my maturity. you can go judge somebody else. i havent said anything wrong. Mr Lord Phillip. God bless you.