Saint Therese Posted October 14, 2008 Share Posted October 14, 2008 Not to mention pregnancy, diseas and that whole going-to-hell thingie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pax_Et_Bonum Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Save it all for your wedding day. If you let yourself be tempted, you will eventually start falling. Purity is a direction, not a bunch of rules and lines in the sand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missionseeker Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 And, this, I think is the problem of puritanism. It is not bad to be physically affectionate. It is bad to be too much so. It is not bad to drink, it is bad to drink to the point of drunkeness. If you see physical affection as simply a temptation, then ...that's just not right. Theologically or otherwise. AND.. then of course you will fall. There is a valid amount of physical affection that is completely not sinful between two persons who are dating. I'm not saying that there is no temptation, but... idk...I think in everything there is temptation and if you are scared that by allowing yourself one small bit of ... I'll say pleasure for lack of better word (and I'm not talking about just dating here, either) you will automatically fall into great sin, then .. that's misunderstanding the beauty of it all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeffpugh Posted November 6, 2008 Share Posted November 6, 2008 Great post! Man(kind) cannot live without feeling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint Therese Posted November 6, 2008 Share Posted November 6, 2008 I agree. I think puritanism is totally incompatible with authentic Catholic thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeffpugh Posted November 16, 2008 Share Posted November 16, 2008 Yeah. God made flesh. It is good. Contact is good. It's actually required for human survival. If babies don't get contact, they die. If grown people don't have contact in some way, it can drive them mad. Fulton Sheen has talked about contact in one of his TV shows... I forget what the episode is called... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
picchick Posted November 16, 2008 Share Posted November 16, 2008 I did not pick hand/foot massage because I do not like my feet being touched. I have this one reflex that causes me to kick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MC IMaGiNaZUN Posted November 18, 2008 Share Posted November 18, 2008 I made a vow of chastity, so maybe its just easier for me to get by without affection... Anyways, periods of single-ness are helpful. Also, instead of asking where do i draw the line... Ask, how far will i go to lead the one i care about to God! However, personally, i need a hug every now and then, and I am not ashamed of that! shalom bro mark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RemnantRules Posted December 22, 2008 Share Posted December 22, 2008 Blessed Be God!!! I have dealt with this for my whole life. I have read many books, and experienced it first hand like I think everyone who has posted here has. Some things that are taught by the CCC and some other things. *WARNING* I apologize first hand if these have been already stated, I only read the 1st and last page. In the CCC in section 2352 it states: "The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason outside of marriage is contrary to its purpose.” So as to how far is too far we can look at this and we look at any deliberate use to purposely arouse someone else, yourself, or have them purposely arouse you should to be avoided. Why? because to start arousal whether intentional or not, your mind and body has started the prosess which it knows that the finish line is Sex. I remember in H.S. especially, but even in College when, if you weren't holding hands, or giving some type of affection then you were looked at as something was wrong with you, or why are you two even dating? Dating should always have a purpose. The purpose is to see if God is calling you two to marriage. This is not an official teaching of the C.C. but I think it makes sense, or at least I hope it does. Dating/Courtship should not be a time to get to know the basics of someone, that's what friendship is for. But the most important thing is to know what your vocation is, or have some course of a vocation before you go forth with anything. For myself I felt God was calling me to the Religious life. Now that I am married, God obviously didn't want me to be a religious. I know now God needed me to look at him first. All that time before I was always looking for "the one". My wife, and it wasn't until I stopped looking and focused on God, that he dropped my wife into the picture. Praise God!!! haha I can tell you now from my own experience being newly-married (just hit two months a couple of days ago) that how you treat each other in the dating/courtship and engagement time is how you will treat your husband or wife. I'm assuming by the time you have been with your future spouse you will have a typical way of seeing each other. If you practice a strong virtue of Chastity early on in the relationship and have an open communication on what is acceptable and what is not, you will go very far. Pope Benedict XVI in his first encyclical entitled, “God is Love,” warned that when the reason for sexual activity is simply for pleasure, the body is reduced to a mere commodity that can be bought and sold. Saint Augustine says, “we are restless until we rest in God.” The heart of every man is restless and so it is natural for man to want to give his heart to another rather than God, to find rest and union in another rather than God. It is to have eyes only to God first and your whole-self to him and his son and a devotional love to Mary and the Saints, and if God wants your vocation to be married, then you will be able to run into the arms of our spouse that God has shown you and be able to reap the rewards on your wedding night, and live a holy marriage. Dating in America is a cultural thing, and there is obviously no teachings on dating itself, but as far as how far of Physical Touch this is clear in the Teachings of the Catholic Church. Yes it is personally and to find and understand the gift of self and who far it is for yourself, but Chastity should always ALWAYS be in practice at every stage of every relationship. I hope some of this makes sense. I know it is EXTREMELY hard in today's culture to live a devout and chaste life, but it is possible. I remained a virgin till my wedding night, and I can tell you it was absolutely worth it. I'll be praying for all those who are tempted by the flesh. I'll finish with these two saint quotes that I really like. First is from the letter of Saint Peter “Stay sober and alert. Your opponent the devil is prowling like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, solid in your faith.” I know we can spend time talking and talking about this, but it only counts when you are in the situation. And we can rationalize anything in our minds, but we must always stay sober and stand strong to resist the Devils temptations. Last saint quote that I love is from St. Angela Merici said, “Disorder in society is the result of disorder in the family.” We must pray for good, strong, and holly Catholic Families God Bless Jason Gregory Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
socalscout Posted December 22, 2008 Share Posted December 22, 2008 I really did not read every post and if I am restating what someone has said I apologize. I do not have an answer but will throw this is by saying that age plays a big factor. In highschool physical touch like holding hands, kissing etc was a big deal and very arousing whereas when you get older it might not be so arousing. Hormones might not have such a role as emotions do when getting older. Holding hands for a 15 year old boy might be a focus of attention more so than at 25. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachael Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 [quote name='socalscout' post='1733989' date='Dec 22 2008, 05:08 PM']I really did not read every post and if I am restating what someone has said I apologize. I do not have an answer but will throw this is by saying that age plays a big factor. In highschool physical touch like holding hands, kissing etc was a big deal and very arousing whereas when you get older it might not be so arousing. Hormones might not have such a role as emotions do when getting older. Holding hands for a 15 year old boy might be a focus of attention more so than at 25.[/quote] true. so are you insinuating that the rules should change as you get older, or did i read into your statement incorrectly? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatherineM Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 I'm 46, and holding my husband's hand crossing the street makes my heart skip a beat. Don't assume that you can't become aroused over a certain age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest spellingace91 Posted December 28, 2008 Share Posted December 28, 2008 Hello all, I am new to relationships (began one recently after six years of friendship), and am trying to take the moral high ground as opposed to society's morals. I really want to have my girlfriend and I practice chastity, and I'm not really sure about hugging or kissing. We have done both a couple of times, and she said it felt right, but I'm not sure about it. I've read this entire thread, Theology of the Body, Christopher West's materials, etc, and am still unsure. I just want God to be the center of our relationship and she does too, but how do I know if I'm going too far? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeffpugh Posted December 28, 2008 Share Posted December 28, 2008 Uhhh... arousal is too far. Just remember the power of actions is different to you and your girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest spellingace91 Posted December 28, 2008 Share Posted December 28, 2008 [quote name='Sacred Music Man' post='1736723' date='Dec 28 2008, 02:11 AM']Uhhh... arousal is too far. Just remember the power of actions is different to you and your girl[/quote] So is this to say that as long as what I do arouses neither me nor my girlfriend, I may humbly proceed? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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