Does Anyone Have A Relative Or Close Friend Who Is Gay Or Lesbian?

[Vincent Vega]

My Aunt is a lesbian. She was raised Catholic, so she knows how the Church feels. I don't know her religious stance, but I love her just the same anyway.

["Kyrie eleison"]

Thank you all for your repsonses. I was starting to feel like I needed to go and evangalize all the gays and lesbians that I come across, which is alot, since I am in the fashion industry. It has been weighing heavy on my mind and then a Catholic friend had mentioned to me that my salvation was on the block if I did attempt to evangalize, it was all starting to make me feel guilty.

I have now put things in perspective.

I actually have fun with the gays in my field. They are fun and we really get along. My cousin is a blast to be around and she is very thoughtful, kind and very generous.

["Kyrie eleison"]

[quote]Why is it just sexual sin that warrants our special attention? Are we also to go out of our way to speak to heterosexual couples who are cohabiting, or are we to reserve our attentions for gay people alone?[/quote]

This is a good point. Why do we single out gays... as if they are COMITTING the MOST GREIVIOUS ACT. Fornicating is fornicating regardless of your sexual preference.

[Veritas]

[quote name='Cathoholic Anonymous' post='1444662' date='Jan 11 2008, 04:31 PM']This is something that I don't understand. Are you also to be held accountable for not specifically admonishing liars, thieves, strangers who take God's name in vain in your hearing, people whom you see fare-dodging on the train, teenage vandals, or people who deliberately drop litter in the street? Why is it just sexual sin that warrants our special attention? Are we also to go out of our way to speak to heterosexual couples who are cohabiting, or are we to reserve our attentions for gay people alone?

It's not always possible to be vocal about sin. There is too much to talk about. It's important to tailor your evangelistic approach to the person and the situation, allowing yourself to be guided by the Holy Spirit. I agree with Spamity that it's a bit presumptuous of someone to claim that your salvation is in jeopardy if you don't do XYZ.[/quote]

+

I think the difference is if it is someone you know and not a stranger. Also, admonishing the sinner is a corporal work of mercy -it is good for us, and them- even though uncomfortable most of the time. If our friends are involved in any sort of habitual sin, whether it is lying, stealing, cheating, or homosexuality, we should gently and lovingly express our concern, always presenting the fact that there are other options out there -that is the loving thing to do. The key is to be prudent about it and gentle.

["Kyrie eleison"]

[quote]Also, admonishing the sinner is a corporal work of mercy -it is good for us, and them- even though uncomfortable most of the time.[/quote]

Veritas,

I guess if I am honest with myself, I can say I feel hypocritical admonishing my cousin and gay friends for their lifestyle, as I too am a sinner, and far from perfect.

[Kitty]

I have two gay friends, one is male, the other is female. I've never spoken to them about their orientation and I don't intend to unless they want to discuss it with me. It's none of my business. My gay friends are just as much fun to hang around with as my straight friends. They are funny, compassionate, sympathetic, and I like to talk with them. They're just people made by God and He decided to make them have a different oritentation, and different struggles, because he loves them. We need to love them too and help them when they ask or need it. Doesn't mean we need to approve of their lifestyle, but we still need to love them.

[Veritas]

[quote name='"Kyrie eleison' post='1444756' date='Jan 11 2008, 08:10 PM']Veritas,

I guess if I am honest with myself, I can say I feel hypocritical admonishing my cousin and gay friends for their lifestyle, as I too am a sinner, and far from perfect.[/quote]

+

I hear what you are saying, but using that logic, none of us would ever admonish another and the Church tells us we ought to (and using that logic -the Church would be wrong!)! Why ought we to admonish? It is an act of mercy, an act of love. We see Christ himself do this in the Gospels and we see the Apostles as well. I speak as a sinner myself, of course. Let's make sure to make the distinction -I am not saying condemning, and that is not what the Church says. She says to "admonish"

def: "Admonish" 1 a: to indicate duties or obligations to b: to express warning or disapproval to especially in a gentle, earnest, or solicitous manner 2: to give friendly earnest advice or encouragement to -Webster

God Bless,
V

[Veritas]

[quote name='Kitty' post='1444875' date='Jan 12 2008, 01:49 AM']I have two gay friends, one is male, the other is female. I've never spoken to them about their orientation and I don't intend to unless they want to discuss it with me. It's none of my business. My gay friends are just as much fun to hang around with as my straight friends. They are funny, compassionate, sympathetic, and I like to talk with them. They're just people made by God and He decided to make them have a different oritentation, and different struggles, because he loves them. We need to love them too and help them when they ask or need it. Doesn't mean we need to approve of their lifestyle, but we still need to love them.[/quote]

+

This is interesting, it makes me think of Cain and Abel and the words condemned by God (he can do this, after all he IS God), "Am I my brother's keeper?" Of course, we can't change people, but we DO have an obligation to speak the truth in love to them. I understand this is COMPLETELY counter-cultural, but Christ and his Church ask it of us pretty clearly!

God Bless,
V

["Kyrie eleison"]

[quote]I hear what you are saying, but using that logic, none of us would ever admonish another and the Church tells us we ought to (and using that logic -the Church would be wrong!)! Why ought we to admonish? It is an act of mercy, an act of love. We see Christ himself do this in the Gospels and we see the Apostles as well. I speak as a sinner myself, of course. Let's make sure to make the distinction -I am not saying condemning, and that is not what the Church says. She says to "admonish"

def: "Admonish" 1 a: to indicate duties or obligations to b: to express warning or disapproval to especially in a gentle, earnest, or solicitous manner 2: to give friendly earnest advice or encouragement to -Webster

God Bless,
V[/quote]

Thank you V, for making things more clearer for me. It all makes more sense to me.

[infinitelord1]

i am glad to see what some of you are writing aboutl. I struggle with same sex attraction. Its not something that I asked for. Its something that was dealt to me. One time I had a sexual attraction towards the opposite sex which has led me on a journey to try to overcome same sex attraction. One thing that we have to realize is that nobody is perfect. We all have our faults. Those who hate gays are in a state of sin! Those who prevent gay people from succeding in life are in a state of sin! Its through understanding how people need to treat gay people better. This was certainly not something that people asked for! It was dealt to them! If you want to help them, you need to look past their orientation and befriend them. If you are of the same sex as the gay person...treat them as you would any other member of the same sex. Try to make them feel like they are apart of the group especially if you are in a group full of the same sex. What I have learned is...homosexuality is a gender identity issue. It has a lot to do with how the person views him/her self.

[Kitty]

[quote name='Veritas' post='1444884' date='Jan 12 2008, 02:36 AM']+

This is interesting, it makes me think of Cain and Abel and the words condemned by God (he can do this, after all he IS God), "Am I my brother's keeper?" Of course, we can't change people, but we DO have an obligation to speak the truth in love to them. I understand this is COMPLETELY counter-cultural, but Christ and his Church ask it of us pretty clearly!

God Bless,
V[/quote]

See, I don't think it is our duty to barge into someone else's orientation and be like "you know, what you're doing is a sin, and if you don't repent, you're going to hell". How would you feel if someone of a different Religion than yours came up to you and started admonishing your actions based on their Religion. I know that if I was the person being admonished, I could care less about what they said because I'm not a part of the Religion anyway.

If gay people do not know that they are sinning when they engage in homosexual actions, then they are not guilty of anything. If I knew a gay person who was Catholic, and knew he was sinning, then I might say something to him.

[Kitty]

double post

Edited January 12, 2008 by Kitty

["Kyrie eleison"]

infinitelord,

It definitely is something that should be disccussed. In the fundamentalist/evangelical circles to be gay or lesbian is basically treating you like you have the plague. Fornication is fornication, regardelss of you preference.

Many families of gays and lesbians like to pretend that it is something that will pass. My aunt is in denial that her daughter is a lesbian. Her brother's wife told him, if she ever told me that she is, she cannot see the kids.

My cousin loves those kids and will not bring up the matter with her brothers family. It is such a struggle with her.

She even married when she was younger and that was such a big disaster.

Edited January 12, 2008 by "Kyrie eleison"

["Kyrie eleison"]

[quote]What I have learned is...homosexuality is a gender identity issue. It has a lot to do with how the person views him/her self.[/quote]

Infinitelord,

If you could kindly expound.... I know that my cousin was treated like a boy from an early age. Her mom used to dress her like a boy as they really wanted a boy. I know that this has affected her identity greatly.

With that said, if this is not her fault, I wonder if this could possibly fall under the invinicble ignorant clause. Of course, she still would have to suffer the pains of purgatory.

[Spamity Calamity]

[quote name='infinitelord1' post='1444903' date='Jan 12 2008, 08:05 AM']i am glad to see what some of you are writing aboutl. I struggle with same sex attraction. Its not something that I asked for. Its something that was dealt to me. One time I had a sexual attraction towards the opposite sex which has led me on a journey to try to overcome same sex attraction. One thing that we have to realize is that nobody is perfect. We all have our faults. Those who hate gays are in a state of sin! Those who prevent gay people from succeding in life are in a state of sin! Its through understanding how people need to treat gay people better. This was certainly not something that people asked for! It was dealt to them! If you want to help them, you need to look past their orientation and befriend them. If you are of the same sex as the gay person...treat them as you would any other member of the same sex. Try to make them feel like they are apart of the group especially if you are in a group full of the same sex. What I have learned is...homosexuality is a gender identity issue. It has a lot to do with how the person views him/her self.[/quote]

Thanks for sharing infinite!