Interreligous Dialouge For Dummies . . . I Need Some Advice

[running the race]

Hi everyone! I wasn't sure where to put this post, but here looked like the best place. We'll see if I'm right. I'm a cradle Catholic and one of my closest friends in nondenominational. Lately a lot of conversation has focused on religion. He told me that I was the first Catholic he's ever met that didn't fall into the "I go to Mass on Sunday, I must be good." crowd. He very much wants to hear what I believe about . . . well . . . everything. I would love to share, but I always choke. I hope this makes sense. I want so much to leave him with a good impression of the Catholic faith, but I'm afraid of the debates that may come (I'm not fond of controversy). If you were given the challenge of sharing the whole of your Catholic faith, where would you start and what would you say? Am I the only one that fears debate? For those who are not Catholic, what would you like to hear from us?

Say a prayer for my friend and I and God bless.

[carrdero]

I understand how difficult it is to represent a religion, especially if you are the only who is representing that religion. The first thing you may want to explain to this person is that you want to share your beliefs and that you would be happy to explain what, how and why you believe but if there is any answer that you are not sure of, ask this person politely if you could get back to them if they are interested. There are probably many people here on Phatmass who would be happy to help you out.

But there is something that you can do before these conversation. Be prepared. Organize your beliefs, research and understand the reasons for your beliefs and do not hesitate to tell this person “I’m not sure.” or “I don’t know” if there is a question you are not competent to respond to. This will avoid unwanted controversy and provide this person with the appreciation of an honest answer from you rather than watching them raise skeptical eyebrows.

Edited November 18, 2007 by carrdero

[Dismas]

Congratulations! You have already leaped past confrontational apologetics and into ecumenical dialog! Let me first state that you may need to do some apologetics work, but your friend is already cautiously intrigued. Sure, you may not be the instrument of full conversion, or that he will ever fully embrace his baptismal inheritance on this side of eternity, but at least you may give him a more charitable understanding of the Church.

Well, I suppose a good start is learning the Catechism. Sure the thing weighs about a ton and reads like an encyclopedia, but it really does help put into words those things that you know but can't express. There is also a very helpful "Concise Companion and Commentary" that can get you through the really dry parts.

Well, first, I generally prefer to go to Confession before I get involved, as the words seem to flow so much better when I don't have so many sins hanging over my head. I would include him in my prayers if I were you especially before the Sacrament, and a daily act of contrition and rosary is powerful stuff.

Aside from that, I find that starting off with the Eucharist is helpful. After all, the Eucharist is the source and summit of the whole of the Catholic Faith. Understanding the Eucharist, and all that it implies places a firm foundation in understanding all other doctrines, controversial or commonly accepted, that reside in the Catholic Church. Also, there is a commonality of a lower order of experience, as most Protestant denominations have quarterly, monthly, or sometimes weekly communion services.

Of course, there is usually some tough questions regarding Mary and the Pope, and it is good to have read up on some apologetics to that nature (Scott Hahn, Patrick Madrid, Jimmy Akin, etc.), but even then it comes down to just describing the Church you love.

In the end, it isn't asked of you to be a professional apologist with all the answers, especially to a close friend. A sincere, though stumbling and halting, explanation of your Faith in friendship is a hundred times stronger in your friend's heart than any formulaic argument could ever be.

God Love you,
Dismas

P.S. I dread debates about my Faith, as I often feel deeply unqualified. Even so, the Spirit will provide, and I have to start somewhere.

Edited November 18, 2007 by Dismas

[jeffpugh]

I think these two have said it all. I gotta give props to Carderro when he says to tell them "I don't know" if you're unable to give a proper answer. That's key. You don't have to know everything right away. Just pray, study and see how it goes as things progress. I'm not to happy with "debating" either. I like to just give the witness instead. Best part about that is, we all learn as we go. God bless, and hope this all goes well.

[cmotherofpirl]

If you get stuck on a question just ask us here.

[running the race]

Thanks everybody! I got some really solid advice here (some things I always knew but just forgot). I may be asking more questions in the future, but that's one of the many things I like about our church. We're universal. If you have a problem anybody from any part of the world can come to help. Thanks for being there. Say a prayer for me and my friend (and that our conversations go well). God bless!

[dairygirl4u2c]

apologetics can take you years of learning unless you talk to someone seasoned from both sides. it can really depend on how deep you want to get, or your opponent, to use debate terms, want to get.

for most issues, and most people though, you can garnish a basic understanding to show that you have formidable beliefs, not just whack misunderstandings that are often said to be the CC beliefs. this will entice, perhaps, THEM to go into the rabbit hole. how deep will it go for them? it's hard to say. when they get to a point, and they know there's more to it, but they stop, they might be culpable. it works both ways though, for you as well as them.

just remember God doesn't expect you to be a PhD. but he also expects you to have a reasonable belief. it's a balancing act you have to struggle with.

Edited November 21, 2007 by dairygirl4u2c

[elizabeth_jane]

Oh wow...welcome to the club!
All of my best friends in high school and college were Protestants so I got asked lots of questions (besides being told, regularly, that I was going to Hell!)

I have found that if the person has specific questions it's always good to start there. I have read the Catechism, but it also helps to read the bible daily (start w/ the gospels), as well as "everyman" apologetics, like Scott Hahn, who is very, very helpful (especially since he used to be a Protestant minister!).

As always, you can say "I don't know" or "I can check." I've done that a lot and it adds to the collegiality of the debate. People seem to appreciate it when I say I don't know. I mean, we're talking 2000 years here--there's a lot to go over!

And I wouldn't tell anyone they're "going to Hell." ( )

[elizabeth_jane]

Oh, and Catholicism for Dummies is EXCELLENT. It covers just about everything imaginable in an easy and accessible style. I print out chapters for our Adult Ed. committee at church!

[RobeofJustice]

I suggest you find and read the book "Where we got the Bible" by Henry Graham, who wrote it as a non-Catholic. Knowing how to explain that we are all indebted to the Catholic Church, who is resposible for giving us the Bible, was instrumental in my conversion to Catholicism.

[mom25angels]

I'd start where you have common ground first. I think many of my Evangelical friends didn't really realize how much we had in common and that helps when the topics of papal authority, Mary, the Saints, purgatory, confession etc...come up.