Virtus Training, Anyone?

[PapaHilarious]

Just went to [i]Virtus[/i] training last night. Though it had some good intentions, I have to mention a few annoyances...

1. The kids in the videos were obviously actors, and bad ones at that. This wouldn't have been a problem if they would have admitted that the people in the video were not the [i]actual[/i] persons. It made us wonder if the stories were even real to begin with.

2. One of the examples of molestation, as told through an actor, was about a female teacher and a female student. I know it's fun to be PC with these kinds of things, but our small group discussion was left asking...has such physical (not verbal) sexual harassment ever been brought to trial? If the story is true, then obviously it's horrible, but the credibility, particularly with all the bad acting, was definitely in question.

Some of the statements were very misleading in the way they were worded. For example:

3. [b]"Most sex abusers are not homosexual."[/b] In reality, studies show that a significant percentage (as compared to the national % of homosexuals in the community) do have homosexual tendencies. Sure, that is not "most," but the point of this statement was to make people think that it is primarily a heterosexual issue, and thereby shatter our stereotypes. Further complicating this issue was "sex" abuser as opposed to "child" abuser. Someone who is 21 and has sex with a 15 yr old can certainly be charged with a crime, but when you use a term like "sex abuser" you completely confuse all your statistics because you've lumped in pedophiles with lesser criminal offensives, like statutory rape.

4. [b]"Only 5% of children intentionally lie about being abused."[/b] Again, what does this really mean? "Intentionally" lie shows us that there could be many children that are confused and thereby "accidentally" lie because they misunderstand what an abuse is. That was never addressed. ... Also, what about the % of [i]adults[/i] who lie about abuse? This was never addressed either until a parent asked. And then the facilitator gave a very awkward response saying that out of the 5%, only 1% was a child lying. The other 4% were adults. HUH?? They already said we were talking about "children" lying. What about the great number of adults who lie for custody cases or lie to get in on a class action lawsuit where the statute of limitations has been removed?

5. Is it too much to ask that a mandatory informational session held by the Church mention even the slightest bit of Church teaching? We had 160 people show up! Couldn't we use the opportunity to tell them [i]something[/i] about our faith besides "molesting is wrong"??

Well, anyway, I imagine that many who have gone through [i]Virtus[/i] can share my frustration. Any thoughts?

[prose]

There are a few threads on this already.. I will dig them up for you.

[prose]

Here is one to start:

[url="http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/index.php?showtopic=51465&hl=virtus"]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/index.php?s...5&hl=virtus[/url]

[PapaHilarious]

[quote name='prose' post='1385507' date='Sep 14 2007, 12:49 PM']There are a few threads on this already.. I will dig them up for you.[/quote]

Eh, 2006? That's living in the past. This is a new thread with new and powerful insights. I'm sticking by it

[N/A Gone]

fight the power!!!

Whats virtus training?

[PapaHilarious]

[quote name='Revprodeji' post='1385518' date='Sep 14 2007, 01:02 PM']fight the power!!!

Whats virtus training?[/quote]

It's the unfortunately redundant and often patronizing "Protect the Children" sessions the Church does to tell staff and volunteers not to molest children.

[N/A Gone]

Oh.

We need to be told?

[kateri05]

apparently

[N/A Gone]

Your husband..


Im just playin, when I worked in youth ministry at our evan/baptist church we had to fill out a 5 page background check and all that.

[beatty07]

Somewhere between the third and the eleventh time I filled out the SAME background check form in the space of two years, and amidst full participation in not 1 but 2 "really, we mean it, don't molest kids" seminars, I came to this realization: it's a tiny penance for the monstrous abominations that have been visited upon the littlest of Christ's brethren. So if this little penance of mine (and yours) makes a drop in the ocean, that's worthwhile right?

[N/A Gone]

very good perspective Beatty.

[ardillacid]

Wait, the problem really has been ccd teachers molesting kids? And here all this time I thought it was kids. huh.

[Mercy me]

I took it a few years ago and actually found it horrifying. I was amazed at the coldness of the perps.

[PapaHilarious]

[quote name='Mercy me' post='1385649' date='Sep 14 2007, 06:24 PM']I took it a few years ago and actually found it horrifying. I was amazed at the coldness of the perps.[/quote]

i agree with how disturbing that was. i will say it could have used some explanation.

for example: why were these men not in jail? why did they agree to tell their stories? do they feel any remorse? i thought it was just strange how we heard them speak without any context. know what i mean?

[Mercy me]

[quote name='PapaHilarious' post='1385653' date='Sep 14 2007, 08:37 PM']i agree with how disturbing that was. i will say it could have used some explanation.

for example: why were these men not in jail? why did they agree to tell their stories? do they feel any remorse? i thought it was just strange how we heard them speak without any context. know what i mean?[/quote]

You know those questions were asked and answered at teh session I attended. Unlike most sessions in our diocese it was given by Mrs. Doty from Virtus not the local people. The guys in the video that I saware not actors they are convicted child molesters who were participating in the video as a"community service" part of their punishment. She said that these types of criminals generally don't display remorse or even recognize what it is that they are doing. It blew my mind when I was told that. I still can't comprehend it.