My Diocese Doesn't Want Me

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='Maggie' post='1367946' date='Aug 22 2007, 01:21 PM']You have a lot of options! I would be so excited in your shoes! Instead of being stuck in my regular "real world" job... Maybe God really wants to use you in someone's life during this time, during missionary work or whatever, some role you couldn't play if you went in the seminary right this minute.

Dollars to doughnuts, a year from now you will look back at this situation and clearly see God's hand in your journey.[/quote]

I don't know if I can afford to go back to school five years (or so) down the road.

[be_thou_my_vision]

Ah yes! NET was what I had in mind! You would meet a lot of people through this and gain valuable knowledge!
Missionaries of Charity (Mother Teresa's order) accept volunteers for a few months to a few years! If you are interested in missionary work, this may be an option. Also, there are Camboni Missionaries that work in Africa.

Edited August 22, 2007 by be_thou_my_vision

[Totus Tuus]

[quote name='GodChild' post='1367592' date='Aug 22 2007, 12:18 AM']do you really believe "jesus" crushes you to see if you love him more?[/quote]

I never said Jesus crushed him.

[franciscanheart]

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1365782' date='Aug 21 2007, 02:53 PM']It's also the VD saying "You're too stupid and have no friends"[/quote]
Is this truly what you believe? If so, I would sit down with someone a little older and wiser and ask what they would have to say about this. That sounds like an irrational assumption stemming from pride and immaturity. Perhaps these are reasons you have not yet been accepted into seminary?

It is necessary to remember that having a desire does not mean that you are automatically granted entrance. There are many deciding factors in being admitted to seminary and to convents and friaries. Vocations directors are concerned first with you as an idividual and then the community as a whole (with you as a part).

Seminaries are not meant to babysit or form you into a person. They are meant to form you into a priest.

Get out. Live life some. Learn to be rational in your reactions. Then reapply. If you are as worthy a candidate as you believe you are, and it is God's will for you to be a priest, you will be accepted in time.

[quote name='Terra Firma' post='1365863' date='Aug 21 2007, 04:44 PM']I guess the other thing I've learned over the years is that sometimes the end goal you've been working toward isn't the important thing, it's the work you did along the way ... the preparations you made for yourself thinking you would be a diocesan priest may come in handy with whatever God [i]is[/i] calling you to. And, like others have said, maybe the answer is not "never" but rather "not now."

One verse I've come to truly treasure is the one where St. Paul talks about God working all things together for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purposes. We all go through heartbreaks and disappointments in life, but God uses those, if we let him, to form us into the people he is calling us to be. The friendships that end in disaster, the dreams that don't come true, the loves that die -- these are all opportunities for us to grow in character, perseverance, and grace. Out of great perversity God brings about great goodness. While you may not see it in the moment, and the pain of what you're going through may be great, [i]there is always hope[/i]. God through his grace makes all things new ... beauty rises out of ashes. Don't give up hope.[/quote]
I agree with all quoted above.

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1367821' date='Aug 22 2007, 09:29 AM']And then the VD's don't even have the decency to reply to an email I sent them.[/quote]
Again, is this really an appropriate reaction? This is very immature of you to say. I would edit you but I don't see it helping anything.


You have my prayers.

[catholicinsd]

I had a question about the application, so I emailed them a month ago, and they still haven't replied.

[franciscanheart]

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1368038' date='Aug 22 2007, 02:30 PM']I had a question about the application, so I emailed them a month ago, and they still haven't replied.[/quote]
Then a rational reaction, in my opinion, would be one of the following:

a) Hmm, I haven't received an email back from them and it has been [i]X[/i] weeks. Perhaps it got lost in the shuffle. I should email them again. Or maybe I should call them.

b) Hmm, I haven't received an email back from them and it has been [i]X[/i] weeks. Perhaps it got lost in the spam fiddler. I should email them again. Or maybe I should call them.

b) Hmm, I haven't received an email back from them and it has been [i]X[/i] weeks. Perhaps the secretary was busy and has since forgotten. I should email them again. Or maybe I should call them.

Do you see how these might have been better, healthier approaches to the situation? Instead of bad-mouthing the people in the office, show some kindness and give them the benefit of the doubt. Email again, write a letter, or call. You haven't done anything to follow up and thusly you are partly to blame for nothing happening.

[Totus Tuus]

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1368038' date='Aug 22 2007, 03:30 PM']I had a question about the application, so I emailed them a month ago, and they still haven't replied.[/quote]

Hey, just a bit of encouragement. One time when I emailed someone I REALLY needed to hear back from, concerning my vocation, which made me feel really vulnerable, I didn't hear back for a month, either. They finally emailed me and said that their computer had been broken for a long time and it was just fixed.

I don't know why they aren't emailing you, but I wouldn't assume that it's 100% certain that they're not responding because they don't WANT to... give 'em the benefit of the doubt at least

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='hugheyforlife' post='1368071' date='Aug 22 2007, 04:11 PM']Then a rational reaction, in my opinion, would be one of the following:

a) Hmm, I haven't received an email back from them and it has been [i]X[/i] weeks. Perhaps it got lost in the shuffle. I should email them again. Or maybe I should call them.

b) Hmm, I haven't received an email back from them and it has been [i]X[/i] weeks. Perhaps it got lost in the spam fiddler. I should email them again. Or maybe I should call them.

b) Hmm, I haven't received an email back from them and it has been [i]X[/i] weeks. Perhaps the secretary was busy and has since forgotten. I should email them again. Or maybe I should call them.

Do you see how these might have been better, healthier approaches to the situation? Instead of bad-mouthing the people in the office, show some kindness and give them the benefit of the doubt. Email again, write a letter, or call. You haven't done anything to follow up and thusly you are partly to blame for nothing happening.[/quote]
I've tried calling and I get the same out-of-office message.

[Era Might]

[quote]And a scribe came up and said to him, "Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go." And Jesus said to him, "Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man has nowhere to lay his head." Another of the disciples said to him, "Lord, let me first go and bury my father." But Jesus said to him, "Follow me, and leave the dead to bury their own dead."

--Matthew 8:19-22[/quote]
Notice the two different responses he gives to the men. One of them is all ready to go off and be his disciple, but Jesus doesn't invite him. The man wants to do great things with Jesus, but Our Lord tells him to worry about the small things, about getting him a place to sleep. Then the next man wants to follow Jesus, but bury his father first, and Jesus tells him to leave everything and follow him.

You may or may not be called to the Priesthood. It is not a calling you can give yourself. One of the characters in "Brideshead Revisited" says, "If you haven't a vocation it's no good
however much you want to be; and if you have a vocation, you can't get away from it, however much you hate it."

The first man thought he had a vocation to join Jesus and the other disciples, but he didn't. The second man did, and Our Lord held him to it even though he wanted to put it off. Both of them wanted to serve the Lord, but they did it the way Jesus commanded them. If you are called to be a Priest, then if you seek God's will, he will lead you where you need to be. If you aren't called to be a Priest, don't be disappointed, because it's not the plan God has for you. He has another plan, and you have to figure out what it is.

Continue to stay in touch with the VD and see what his reservations are, and try to work on those aspects of your life. You're young, you may have a vocation to the Priesthood in five years, fifteen years, even twenty five years. If you really feel called, then take this as an opportunity to grow as a person so that you can work toward the goal of becoming a Priest. As others have pointed out, if you are not called to be a Priest, your efforts will not be in vain, because you will be growing spiritually and personally, and will be better equipped for wherever God is leading you.

[franciscanheart]

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1368108' date='Aug 22 2007, 04:00 PM']I've tried calling and I get the same out-of-office message.[/quote]
So clearly the issue is not them ignoring you because they don't want to speak with you. This also helps all of us to understand, at least a little more, where you're coming from. Have you tried speaking with someone in person?

It is important, as Era pointed out, that you know the reservations the VD has. Knowing those things is the only way you can learn to not only deal with the issues, but to grow. If no one tells you these things, you don't have the opportunity to learn and grow and form new, better habits.

You, again, have my prayers.

[linnie]

I know its so 20th century, but have you thought about writing a letter? Then you can lay out all of your questions and your concerns.

emails sometimes don't go thru and telephones don't always get answered. This is summer and perhaps people are on vacation, hence the unanswered phone.

Give a letter a try. Ask your questions respectfully and prayerfully and I'm willing to bet your get a response in kind.

blessings, linnie

[catholicinsd]

The worst part is, I haven't even officially applied.

[Deus te Amat]

please, i dont mean to be rude, but these people are giving you long pieces of advice that are amazingly well thought out and caring... all you do in return is one short sentance that makes you seem even more immature then you appeared before.

the least you can do is give the vocation station a complete explination... and responses or thank yous to people's replies


you are in my prayers, my south dakotan friend...

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='Deus_te_Amat' post='1368630' date='Aug 23 2007, 12:59 AM']please, i dont mean to be rude, but these people are giving you long pieces of advice that are amazingly well thought out and caring... all you do in return is one short sentance that makes you seem even more immature then you appeared before.

the least you can do is give the vocation station a complete explination... and responses or thank yous to people's replies
you are in my prayers, my south dakotan friend...[/quote]

I'm sorry I'm just really upset. But my Diocese did reject me even before I'd turned in my application.

[abercius24]

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1368648' date='Aug 23 2007, 01:23 AM']I'm sorry I'm just really upset. But my Diocese did reject me even before I'd turned in my application.[/quote]

I think you need to get away on some missionary work. All the pressure from your schooling and discernment must have exhausted you these last few years. If you're like me, you get irritable and cranky when you're exhausted. You need to get away and reconnect with the zeal you once had when you first started down this path. Hook up with some missionaries and go live off of God's Divine Providence for 6 months where you can rekindle your calling. Then you'll remember that being a priest was only a bonus to the calling. Your calling remains.

When you get back, consider applying to some of the religious orders. By that time, you'll be glowing so much they'll know you are ready for the priesthood! You may not get to live in your hometown, but you will go where God calls you!

Steve S. -- abercius24
CatholicQandA.com

Edited August 23, 2007 by abercius24