Grace And Marriage And Sex

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='CatherineM' post='1865543' date='May 12 2009, 06:31 PM']I'm not sure she is capable of feeling love, expressing it, or experiencing it. My FIL isn't really interested in money. He is a complete library academic who knows 7 dead languages. He wears a kilt even when it is -40 degrees outside. My MIL is the mercenary one. I almost wonder if she married in the hope of getting some of the money that she saw her married sisters getting. They haven't even slept in the same room during their entire marriage. My husband said he didn't know it was weird for your father to sleep on the couch until he started school.[/quote]
That's embarassing...I usually sleep on the couch so Jen can get a good night's sleep through her pregnancy (and before that, because Aaron would kick me in his sleep)...

[Brother Adam]

Yeah, sure. [i]That's[/i] the reason you sleep on the couch. You just keep saying that to yourself

[CatherineM]

I purposely bought couches that are too short for my husband to sleep on. He's 6'5". For someone who slept alone for 43 years, I find that I can't sleep without him. When he's out of town on business, I hardly sleep at all.

[MithLuin]

Yeah, my mom has trouble sleeping if my dad's out of town as well.

Early in marriage, my dad informed my mom that they would [i]always[/i] be sharing a bed. Both of their parents did the sleep-in-different-beds thing, and had not so great marriages (though to be fair, they did stay together).

[CatherineM]

[quote name='MithLuin' post='1866317' date='May 13 2009, 03:03 PM']Yeah, my mom has trouble sleeping if my dad's out of town as well.

Early in marriage, my dad informed my mom that they would [i]always[/i] be sharing a bed. Both of their parents did the sleep-in-different-beds thing, and had not so great marriages (though to be fair, they did stay together).[/quote]

That's exactly what my husband did as well. My parents slept in twin beds in the same room about the last decade before my dad died. He had horrible nightmares of the War, and often thrashed in his sleep. The women in my mom's family get this kind of thin skin thing as they age, and she bruises just by touching, so spending a night in bed with my dad made her look like he'd been beating her, so I can't say I blame them. He once put his foot completely through the wall in his sleep when I was a kid.

[MithLuin]

Yes, certainly there are good reasons to do that! My parents are not yet elderly, so I don't know if they will continue to be able to sleep in the same bed as they get older. I do know it's something that's important to them, though. I'm very proud of them for having a good strong marriage despite the less-than-stellar examples of their own parents. My grandparents were good people, but very unhappy in their marriages.

[CatherineM]

[quote name='MithLuin' post='1866427' date='May 13 2009, 04:47 PM']Yes, certainly there are good reasons to do that! My parents are not yet elderly, so I don't know if they will continue to be able to sleep in the same bed as they get older. I do know it's something that's important to them, though. I'm very proud of them for having a good strong marriage despite the less-than-stellar examples of their own parents. My grandparents were good people, but very unhappy in their marriages.[/quote]

My grandparents seemed unhappy like that as well. The slept in opposite ends of their house. I was told my grandfather really snored loud. He had a pretty large nose. They were 62 and 70 years old when I was born, so I don't ever really remember them as "young." I could probably count on the fingers of one hand truly happy marriages in my family. One aunt and my great uncle are the exceptions. Neither had kids. I wonder if that had anything to do with it. Not that kids make you unhappy, by far, but they didn't have incentive to stay together just for the kids, so they stayed together because they really wanted to. My husband and I won't ever have kids, and I wonder if my grand nieces and nephews will talk about us that way in 50 years.