Spanking

[Socrates]

"He who spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes" (Proverbs 13:24)

There is nothing wrong with spanking, if done in moderation, and a spirit of loving discipline.
There is a difference between spanking and child-abuse, and proper moderation should be exercised (Obviously, parents should not beat their kids black-and-blue, but there are already laws in place against such abuse). I think especially for small children, spanking is more effective than other forms of discipline.

What form of discipline should be used and how probably varies with different parents and children, but that is for the parents to decide. Laws against all spanking and corporal punishment are a grave intrusion of government into family life where it has no business. It is not the job of government to dictate how parents must raise their kids.

As for the argument that spanking makes kids violent, that is just more liberal malarky. Corporal punishment used to be administered much more commonly in times past, yet there is hardly less violence among kids today. Back when kids learned to the tune of the hickory stick, Columbine-style massacres and such were unheard of. There is much more of a problem with undisciplined kids who get away with everything until they grow up and run afoul of the law. Absent or weak fathers are more of a problem in society than fathers who responsibly administer corporal punishment. (Actually abusive fathers are a different story).

Saying allowing parents to decide whether or not to spank their kids is "tantamount other things liberals don't get away with" if you are referring to "the right to choose" abortion is stupid.
Parents should be allowed to discipline their children, not kill them. Anyone who cannot see the difference is wilfully blind.

Edited July 11, 2007 by Socrates

[Dreamweaver]

I was swatted on the behind when I seriously misbehaved, and I turned out normal. To me it wasn't the physical pain that kept me in line, it was the hurt ego. I wasn't spanked for trivial stuff. I don't think I was spanked past 6 years old or something along those lines. I do have problems with parents that spank their children out of ANGER and abuse them.

[Starets]

No, it should not be made illegal. One thing we do NOT need is "Government by social worker". Group Homes and Foster Homes are not necessarily better than the parents. Trust me. Nevertheless, one of the things I am deeply grateful for is that I am not called to parenthood. Ther is no way I could ever spank. Not after whjat happened to me. I will not go into details as there are minors on this site.

[kenrockthefirst]

[quote name='cmotherofpirl' post='1323268' date='Jul 10 2007, 04:48 PM']Spanking is a quick effective method for getting a childs undivided attention. A swat on the tail at the time of the offense is much better than the parent whining wait til I get you home etc, or yelling or carrying on or threatening the child for later vengance. . That was all that was necessary.
I get extremely tired of hearing children whining in stores, or running thru restaurants or sassing adults and the parents whining back, screaming matches in public, or parents standing there rather helplessly trying to reason with brats.
The first time it happens you explain that they will be taken outside, spanked and with immediately go home and go to bed. If the tantrum , whining etc continues then you follow thru. If you are in the store you calmly leave everything sit there and you walk out the door. You swat the butt [amply padded by the ALmighty anyway] and proceed home. Usually one time is enough to prevent it ever happening again.
I think my eldest was spanked twice, and #2 son once, my daughter never. As they got older other methods of punishment took over, but for misbehaving in public, a swat on the butt and a trip home was all it took.[/quote]
As I said in an earlier post, I have no problem smacking my children's respective bums for trivial matters. It's the "cold blooded," pull down your pants, lie face down on the bed, and I'll have a go at you that I have a problem with.

Whining parents or shouting matches are just as much failures of imagination and intelligence as spanking, IMHO. [i]We're[/i] the adults. We need to keep it together and [i]live out the behavior we want to teach our children.[/i]

Again, each parent must do what works for him / her, within reason of course, i.e. not crossing the line into child abuse.

[cmotherofpirl]

[quote name='kenrockthefirst' post='1324156' date='Jul 11 2007, 10:35 AM']As I said in an earlier post, I have no problem smacking my children's respective bums for trivial matters. It's the "cold blooded," pull down your pants, lie face down on the bed, and I'll have a go at you that I have a problem with.

Whining parents or shouting matches are just as much failures of imagination and intelligence as spanking, IMHO. [i]We're[/i] the adults. We need to keep it together and [i]live out the behavior we want to teach our children.[/i]

Again, each parent must do what works for him / her, within reason of course, i.e. not crossing the line into child abuse.[/quote]

In my book, that would qualify as a beating. Legally in most states, any action taken against a child that results in a mark is abuse.

If you walk around the shopping malls or grocery stores, it sounds like there are very few adults out there.

[T-Bone _]

Yeah. When I think of spanking, I think of a few swats on the butt.

[missionarybelle]

We were spanked as children. and yes sometimes it hurt. but we were always spanked out of love and not out of anger and taught that bad actions had consequenses. and I'll tell you what, when mom would get to correcting us regularly when we did wrong, we knew and were much better behaved. but as soon as she would start slipping, we'd test our boundaries to see what we could get away with.

I'll probably spank my children if I need to. though some kids need different types of punishment. for example, one of my tender young sisters usually only had to be verbally told to stop disobeying and she'd immediately stop. Then another sister came along who was canaille as the day is long. my mom spanked her frequently, washed her mouth out with soap, put her in timeout, made her do extra chores, reduced her privelidges.... she tried just about everything and that sister is STILL extremely defiant. she will make a great saint someday because she's so strong willed.

[Church Punk]

Im shocked this topic is on this good Catholic forum, what a husband and wife want to do for fun should remain between just the 2 of them.

But seriously I think there comes a point where a spanking would do a child some good. Last weekend I was ready to through some kids in the lake because of how horrible they were behaving, but the parents didnt seem to have any problem with it (the childs behavior), my girl friend and I later discussed that if we get married and have kids that act like that we would sell them on the black market.

[kenrockthefirst]

[quote name='cmotherofpirl' post='1324258' date='Jul 11 2007, 09:36 AM']If you walk around the shopping malls or grocery stores, it sounds like there are very few adults out there.[/quote]
I'm not saying I don't whine or shout. Indeed, it's based on my experience of doing same that I know such actions result from a lack of imagination and intelligence.

I think we've agreed that a few smacks on the backside are acceptable and never did anyone any harm, and that force in excess of that verges on or crosses over into abuse.

[T-Bone _]

[quote name='Church Punk' post='1324279' date='Jul 11 2007, 09:10 AM']...my girl friend and I later discussed that if we get married and have kids that act like that we would sell them on the black market.[/quote]

As slaves, or as meat?

[Seven77]

discipline is important. not sure if spanking is the way to do it.

[Ora et Labora]

Ok, I have been with kids whose parents didn't allow spanking in their family compared with the parents who did.

HUGE difference!!

the kids who were not spanked were wild, disrespectful, and altogether crazy. The ones who were spanked knew their place. In todays society, the majority of America's kids are not respectful. I have discovered that most are spoiled brats. It has been rare when I find kids who aren't yelling at their parents, or walking around with expensive electronics, thinking that they own the world! I do not think kids react in violence if they are spanked. First of all, spanking and physical abuse are two completely different things. Yes, the majority of children who were physically abused tend to physically abuse their children in return. Children who are spanked when they deserved it, have discipline and respect for their elders and play mates.

If the parents love and award their children when virtues are seen through them, how can they react violently at an older age even if they were spanked as a younger child from bad behavior? They just learn right from wrong!

I think it is completely illogical to think that children will react violently if spanked when children.

Nowadays, kids own their parents. Parent do not own their kids! And I think a big part in that is that parents to NOT discipline their children. If some kids don't need spanking, just a talking to and then they'll behave, that's great! But, if you try grounding, taking away toys, giving talks, and it still doesn't work, obviously another route needs to be taken. My dad belted all 6 of the kids in my family and we learned that respect towards our parents and elders in general is a big issue. Spanking taught us that bad attitudes, bad words, or any other serious form of bad behavior, was not to be tempered with in our family!

Anyway, I probably went off a little, but those are my thoughts on the issue.

[kenrockthefirst]

[quote name='Ora et Labora' post='1324766' date='Jul 11 2007, 07:14 PM']Ok, I have been with kids whose parents didn't allow spanking in their family compared with the parents who did.

HUGE difference!!

the kids who were not spanked were wild, disrespectful, and altogether crazy. The ones who were spanked knew their place. In todays society, the majority of America's kids are not respectful. I have discovered that most are spoiled brats. It has been rare when I find kids who aren't yelling at their parents, or walking around with expensive electronics, thinking that they own the world! I do not think kids react in violence if they are spanked. First of all, spanking and physical abuse are two completely different things. Yes, the majority of children who were physically abused tend to physically abuse their children in return. Children who are spanked when they deserved it, have discipline and respect for their elders and play mates.

If the parents love and award their children when virtues are seen through them, how can they react violently at an older age even if they were spanked as a younger child from bad behavior? They just learn right from wrong!

I think it is completely illogical to think that children will react violently if spanked when children.

Nowadays, kids own their parents. Parent do not own their kids! And I think a big part in that is that parents to NOT discipline their children. If some kids don't need spanking, just a talking to and then they'll behave, that's great! But, if you try grounding, taking away toys, giving talks, and it still doesn't work, obviously another route needs to be taken. My dad belted all 6 of the kids in my family and we learned that respect towards our parents and elders in general is a big issue. Spanking taught us that bad attitudes, bad words, or any other serious form of bad behavior, was not to be tempered with in our family!

Anyway, I probably went off a little, but those are my thoughts on the issue.[/quote]
With respect, when you have children, come back and update us with your thoughts.

[MissScripture]

I got my share of spankings and AT THAT MOMENT they didn't work. I was a stubborn child, and would defiantly continue what I was doing, despite being reprimanded and taken out of stores/restaurants, until they did give me spankings. And even then, I would continue, out of defiance, but I KNEW I had crossed the line. It was clear to me what I had done wrong. As I got older it got to the point where my mother didn't even have to yell. If she would (and even now) do this sighing thing, and say my name in an exasperated manner, I can't stand it, and I will do anything to get her to not do that!
I'm not sure if I will spank my own children when I am a mother, because I do think it depends greatly on the personality of the child. However, if they're anything like I was...I am praying my children are not as/more stubborn than I!

[Ora et Labora]

[quote name='kenrockthefirst' post='1324779' date='Jul 11 2007, 08:29 PM']With respect, when you have children, come back and update us with your thoughts.[/quote]

i said i was only posting MY thoughts. isn't that the point of the debate table? i guess because i'm still young and without kids i don't know anything. so sorry.