Have You Ever Been Called To Something

[Ash Wednesday]

I mentioned this offhand on another board -- but I think I am called to marriage. The direction my life is moving in and the way things are setting up, it really looks that way and when I'm at mass or in a prayerful disposition that seems to be my answer at this point in time.

But have you ever been called to something but been afraid? You would think that so often people wander around discerning and wanting answers... but I'm just wondering if anybody else has ever experienced this. I feel so strange writing this, I'm 30 years old and I sound like a kid. Or an awkward teenager!

I pride myself in my independence and self-sufficiency so much (sometimes I think to the point of selfishness... I don't want to just live just for myself, and with myself, you know...and oh, that sin of pride that I have, gets me all the time) -- so the idea of marriage goes against the way I am at times -- and I've put off a lot of things for quite some time and lately in the past few months I've been wondering if I've been called for some time but have just been running away out of fear. Fear of failure, fear that I woudn't like it, et cetera.

A priest told me to pray for courage and wisdom. Has anyone else ever suspected a call but been afraid?

Edited April 16, 2007 by Ash Wednesday

[Sanvean]

Absolutely, and it landed me in a world of trouble.

It can be paralyzing, this ridiculous terror mixed in with intense longing; I want/ed nothing more than to give my life to God completely, but can be so easily overwhelmed by a million little fears.

Will I be rejected?

Will I not be able to live up to it?

Of course, the thing is- God never calls us to something without giving us the graces to respond, as I'm sure you know, and you will never know where you are called, unless you give a try. I suspect that holds true for any vocation.

Eventually, there comes a point where you simply need to let go. Trust Him, take that leap of faith, and see where you land.

I'll be praying. I hope you will pray for me, too. We'll get there someday.

[Maria]

What was your question? Have we ever been called to something and [i]not[/i] been afraid? I suppose it's happened...

You just have to decide to ignore all those little fears and trust God. He knows what He's doing.

[Ash Wednesday]

Yeah. I go through weird phases. Sometimes I'm afraid and sometimes I'm thrilled.

[cathoholic_anonymous]

Absolutely. At first I had a holy dread of the cloister. Then I fell in love with it. Prayer transformed it for me. I was kneeling in front of the tabernacle for the quiet hour of personal prayer (this was a Carmelite monastery) and when I got up and looked round, the whole monastery seemed ablaze with beauty. Joy struck me to the heart and I knew that I had to come back.

[AccountDeleted]

I think that all vocations contain some element of fear in them. Fear of not being worthy or fear of not being able to stay committed are just two of them. There are smaller fears and larger ones, but they all have the same source, a lack of faith. It is true that we are weak and sinful, but our Lord is merciful and all loving, so whatever we do with love for Him, will please Him, and He will help us.

Once we feel a "call" or vocation, then we need to put all our faith and trust in Him. Offer ourselves humbly to His Will, and ask that we do nothing that will displease Him, but everything that will please Him. Once we have made this prayer, then we can rest with confidence in His love.

That doesn't mean that there won't be temptations or doubts along the way, but once we start with faith, it becomes so much easier to continue with faith. Just this weekend I had occasion to face temptation, something I thought wouldn't happen now that I am confirmed in my vocation to enter Carmel. But I am glad that it happened. It showed me that I had allowed pride to creep into my heart (thinking that I couldn't be tempted) and also that my vocation is entirely God's grace, not my effort. So even the occasion of temptation can serve to bring us closer to God if we see it early and beg for help.

Christian marriage is definitely a vocation.


[url="http://www.ewtn.com/library/BISHOPS/VOCAMARR.HTM"]Archbishop J Francis Stafford [/url]said...

[i]Every vocation is a call to holiness, and marriage is no exception. But what exactly does holiness mean? In everyday language, we use the words "good" and "holy" almost interchangeably. Holy people are, of course, also good people. These two words do not mean the same thing, however.[/i]

...

[i]Marital love is an act of worship through which God creates new persons destined for eternal, loving union with him; the human parents are sanctified in their cooperation with him. [/i]

...


but he warns...

[i]"At least in the North American context, many Catholic young people marry with good intentions and with a robust love for God and the Church. But they don't take seriously the sacramental nature of marriage, and they don't see the larger purpose or ecclesial dimension of their covenant. Many do not even know what a covenant is. They find it difficult to participate profoundly in the Eucharistic sacrifice. Consequently, they are not ready for the cross. They don't understand its role in marriage; when suffering comes, they see it not as an opportunity to a deepened interiority, but as a failure. They give up."[/i]


So, if marriage is your vocation, then approach it with all the love and sacredness that you would use to discern a religious vocation! And God Bless you!

Annie

Edited April 16, 2007 by nunsense

[Starets]

[quote name='nunsense' post='1245528' date='Apr 16 2007, 09:59 AM']So, if marriage is your vocation, then approach it with all the love and sacredness that you would use to discern a religious vocation! And God Bless you!

Annie[/quote]

I know someone who is approaching her upcoming marriage with pretty much exactly that approach. i think she'll do fine

[cmaD2006]

[quote name='Ash Wednesday' post='1245171' date='Apr 15 2007, 11:51 PM']But have you ever been called to something but been afraid? You would think that so often people wander around discerning and wanting answers... but I'm just wondering if anybody else has ever experienced this. I feel so strange writing this, I'm 30 years old and I sound like a kid. Or an awkward teenager!
... (stuff deleted) ...
A priest told me to pray for courage and wisdom. Has anyone else ever suspected a call but been afraid?[/quote]

Gosh I think you're quite normal. I'm 36 and I understand what you're feeling; even though my calling is not to marriage. Of course the hesitating and being scared is part of any vocation.

God bless you and keep praying for guidance from the Lord.

[johnnydigit]

what if the perfect girl comes along, yet religious life is still strong and you want both equally as bad? one vocation director told me it's not good to just wait to see if a girl comes along and "settle" for religious life if a suitable one doesn't appear by the time you reach a certain age..

[johnnydigit]

what if the perfect girl comes along, yet religious life is still strong and you want both equally as bad? one vocation director told me it's not good to just wait to see if a girl comes along and "settle" for religious life if a suitable one doesn't appear by the time you reach a certain age..

[Margaret]

I don't think there is a Calling from God out there that the devil will not try and attack in one way or another b/c any time we do Gods will We Glorify God and satin can't stand that.

God bless
marge

[puellapaschalis]

I have semi-regular mood swings that go between exhilaration and sheer terror. No idea if it's normal, but you're not the only one

PP

[johnnydigit]

sounds normal to me. be a "regular' person, or be something that goes against everyone and everything in the world, and give up everything that is supposed to be "good". imo considering to take on the most difficult job (decision) in the world is just cause for panic and terror.

btw, in my previous post i was eluding to the point that we need to make our decision, and if it's a vocation, stick with it and block out every possible thing that can lead to marriage. so if a devout catholic movie star comes and falls in love with you, tough!