Jesus_lol Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 (edited) sleeping with people is fine. i have slept in the same bed as a few female friends when we ran out of room, and just sort of spent the night with a girl i didnt really know in guatemala(we were locked outside and it was cold) . however that was all without sex or anything other than platonic comfort in being with a friend. and that is fine. but i dont know what she is like, so carefully tell her your views on it , but in the end let her make her own choices and do not judge her, if you value her as a friend Edited January 20, 2007 by Jesus_lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
picchick Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 [quote name='Didymus' post='1170892' date='Jan 19 2007, 09:16 PM'] i agree [/quote] So do I. You could always pray to the Holy Spirit too. He'll tell you what you need to say. Also pray for their strength. Meg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VeniteAdoremus Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 (edited) [quote name='Jesus_lol' post='1171416' date='Jan 20 2007, 10:13 PM'] sleeping with people is fine. i have slept in the same bed as a few female friends when we ran out of room, and just sort of spent the night with a girl i didnt really know in guatemala(we were locked outside and it was cold) . however that was all without sex or anything other than platonic comfort in being with a friend. and that is fine. but i dont know what she is like, so carefully tell her your views on it , but in the end let her make her own choices and do not judge her, if you value her as a friend [/quote] Sleeping with a person of the other gender in the same room, especially when you're in a relationship, is definitely "near occasion of sin", and as such we should avoid it. Plus, knowing how I was at that age - you just don't want to tempt yourself even a little. And then there's the issue of scandal and setting an example... It's just bad news. Edit: I realize that this may sound a little harsh - but having made some mistakes in my past, I wish I could protect others from making them! Edited January 20, 2007 by VeniteAdoremus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ardillacid Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 Don't worry about it. I think they are both intelligent moral people. Drinking does not make someone evil. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 [quote name='Proud2BCatholic139' post='1170966' date='Jan 19 2007, 09:31 PM'] For reasons that is understandable... [/quote] what does that mean? i don't mean to be dense, but could you explain it for my pregnant brain? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birgitta Noel Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 I just want to add that while it may not be prudent for her to stay with him (if she indeed is) and it may be a near occasion of sin (which is bad too) it's not fair to her or to him to assume that if they do stay together that something is going to happen. IF they do stay together be careful not to be holier than thou about it, that will likely only push her away and prevent her from coming to you with things in the future. She is an adult and has to make her own decisions. She may make some bad ones, and as a friend you can offer suggestions and support (and you can do that now, before she goes) but you cannot stop her from making bad decisions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SJRod55 Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 If you are true friends then you are wise to offer her advice but keep it 'light.' Do not damage the trust she has in you by becoming over bearing. She has the right to make her own decisions, her own free will. This is a test for her. Allow her the opportunity to do the right thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
God the Father Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 Don't worry about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Proud2BCatholic139 Posted January 21, 2007 Author Share Posted January 21, 2007 [quote name='notardillacid' post='1171851' date='Jan 20 2007, 10:05 PM'] Don't worry about it. I think they are both intelligent moral people. Drinking does not make someone evil. [/quote] I'm not saying that drinking makes someone evil, but, it can lead to situations that I just never want to see her in. Not saying it is or isn't going to happen...But, from experience with my childhood and seeing other friends go through a similar situation, I just didn't want them to get hurt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totus Tuus Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 (edited) [quote name='Jesus_lol' post='1171416' date='Jan 20 2007, 03:13 PM'] sleeping with people is fine. i have slept in the same bed as a few female friends when we ran out of room, and just sort of spent the night with a girl i didnt really know in guatemala(we were locked outside and it was cold) . however that was all without sex or anything other than platonic comfort in being with a friend. and that is fine. but i dont know what she is like, so carefully tell her your views on it , but in the end let her make her own choices and do not judge her, if you value her as a friend [/quote] [quote name='Pontifex'] Sharing the bed with your girlfriend is wrong for two reasons: 1. The appearance of evil- If someone were to see you two in bed together there is an automatic assumption that something is going on. As Catholics we are on to avoid the appearance of evil or scandal. 2. The near occasion of sin- If she is your girlfriend and not just a girl that is a friend than there is a sexual attraction as well as an attraction to all the other aspects of her person. It is too risky in my opinion. Blessings, Pontifex [/quote] Even if these girls weren't your girlfriend, I think this answer would still apply. This thread: [url="http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/index.php?showtopic=62186"]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/index.php?showtopic=62186[/url] Edited January 21, 2007 by Totus Tuus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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