TeresaAvila Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 (edited) Hi Pham, I wanted to ask some questions in regards preparing for entrance, I had hoped that my family could have helped me with soem of my business aspects, but sadly I do not have family support as they do not support my going into a cloistered order and have not communicated with me (please pray for them, especially my Father) and I am a bit uncertain what to do in regards some preparations and So I wanted to know what some of you might have done in preparing to enter: What do you do with documents such as your work paystubs, tax informations (you know how we are to hold onto such information for up to 3 years) did you take this with you to the convent? or throw it away? For those who have had apartments, when paying your last months bills (for instance if you entered in May, but your may bill would not come until june) did you pay in advance to cover those bills or what did you do? What did you do in regards to filing your in-come taxes (for those who worked)? OK that's all the questions I can think of right now, Thanks for your help! God Bless You! Edited January 8, 2007 by TeresaAvila Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alicemary Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Dont worry about your family, God will take care of them in time. Trust in Him to handle them and fret no more. As to your questions, I can only answer from my life experiences. Do not throw away important papers, they may one day be vital(just because you are in a convent you are still liable to civil law). Is there a good friend you can entrust them to? Possibly an aunt or uncle? If not, by all means bring them with you. You are still responsible to do your taxes. Your superior should be able to answer that question. Do you do your own taxes now? If so, it would not be so difficult to do them in the convent. I would have enough money saved and given to your superior if you need to use a tax service like H and R block or something. As to your apartment and last minute bills...have you filed change of address forms yet? Are you going to close out all your banking? Again, if you have a good TRUSTED responsible friend, you could possibly leave them an approximate amout of money and have them pay the bills. You will probably be leaving your apartment a few days before you enter, you could find out then how much you have to pay. Utilities are very good about helping out with these things, and estimating costs. You should feel free enough to discuss this with your superiors, they have been through this many time before and I am sure they will be helpful. Best of luck to you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TeresaAvila Posted January 8, 2007 Author Share Posted January 8, 2007 Thank you AliceMary for your kindness and asnwering my questions, Oh I know I will have to file my taxes, I'll give my work the convents address when I resign to forward my W2's I just wasn't sure how one goes about filing them when in the convent, if the convent can file them or if you leave it up to a fam/friend, and in the past I use H&R block and just have the fees deducted from my Tax return, and of course any tax money return will go to my community. I'm meeting with my superior in a bit, I just wanted to know what others here might have done, Thanks for all of your advice, I greatly appreciate it! Thanks for your prayers too!! God Bless You! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DiscerningSoul Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 I know I was asked to bring my SS card and driver's lic. I put my mom on my checking and savings and my safety disposit box. Your not moving far from where your living now, so you can just mention to the bank about your move and such. Good luck and God Bless My sister friend in Christ's name Jessica : [url="http://www.xanga.com/ADiscerningSoul"]http://www.xanga.com/ADiscerningSoul[/url] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
passionheart Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 [quote name='TeresaAvila' post='1159065' date='Jan 8 2007, 05:02 PM'] Thank you AliceMary for your kindness and asnwering my questions, Oh I know I will have to file my taxes, I'll give my work the convents address when I resign to forward my W2's I just wasn't sure how one goes about filing them when in the convent, if the convent can file them or if you leave it up to a fam/friend, and in the past I use H&R block and just have the fees deducted from my Tax return, and of course any tax money return will go to my community. I'm meeting with my superior in a bit, I just wanted to know what others here might have done, Thanks for all of your advice, I greatly appreciate it! Thanks for your prayers too!! God Bless You! [/quote] My brother has power of attorney on my acccounts. He will file my taxes this year and deal with any outstanding bills. Now because I worked 8 days in January, he will file for me next year as well. I shredding all my documents but keeping the last eight years. I am bring with me all my original documents such as birth certificate, sin card, drivers license, passport and any other orignal documents I may have for id. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sixtina87 Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 forgive me for being bold if may seem so....however....if you are preparing for enterence....i would recommend waiting another year...to give your family some time getting use to the idea and that way they have time to think about it carefully and could support you in the future with your decision.....i onlky say this because i care.....becuase i know for a fact if you enter a religious order and your fmaily doesn't support the decision made....you wont be there long at all....because just by knowing all of this i could tell you, that you would eventually become depressed and unhappy about the whole thing....which would cause you to leave the order. Again i only say this because i care and leaving an order not long after enterence is a hard thing to do...trust me on this one!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HisChild Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Well, this is what I have done. Since technically, I was 'only' a postulant and not a full member of the community, it was suggested to me, by my superior, that I keep all my important papers, that I would need for legal purposes. I was to keep my checking account open, forwarding all bills to my monastery address, until it was all paid off. Then, once I entered the novitiate, it would be time for me to close those accounts. As for taxes, I was told that I would be given the opportunity to do so. And chances are, as it is so with the community I was in, that your community will have someone as a benefactor or friend who knows accounting/taxes, to be able to assist you at the proper time. As for your family, I will pray for you. My father did not want anything to do with me, when I told him I was entering a cloister. And now, when my family, at separate occasions have asked me, even though I have a career, home, etc., where I see myself in say, 5 years. . .I answered, that if it were God's will, I might find myself back in religious life. . .or perhaps married, although I don't 'see' myself there, but wanting only to serve our Lord. . .my mother said 'haven't you given that up by now?' ~sighs~ Family. . .you just gotta love them, you know? God bless you and good luck! [quote name='Sixtina87' post='1159427' date='Jan 8 2007, 07:42 PM'] forgive me for being bold if may seem so....however....if you are preparing for enterence....i would recommend waiting another year...to give your family some time getting use to the idea and that way they have time to think about it carefully and could support you in the future with your decision.....i onlky say this because i care.....becuase i know for a fact if you enter a religious order and your fmaily doesn't support the decision made....you wont be there long at all....because just by knowing all of this i could tell you, that you would eventually become depressed and unhappy about the whole thing....which would cause you to leave the order. Again i only say this because i care and leaving an order not long after enterence is a hard thing to do...trust me on this one!!! [/quote] Nicole, I have to respectfully disagree. There are some families that if you waited ten years, they would not be supportive. I don't know the situation in this case, but waiting won't necessarily make it better. And almost every sister I've spoken to, whose family were not supportive in the beginning are even closer to their religious child than they are to their non-religious child/children. Religious lifes seems to bring families closer, not further apart. Now, TeresaAvila, I don't know your situation or your family, but if you feel strongly to enter now. . .with prayer and time, your family will come around. And your life of prayer, sacrifice and service will only bless your family one hundredfold, giving them graces that you couldn't even imagine. God bless you, and I will pray for you as you make the decision that it right for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alicemary Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 I must agree totally with His Child, very wise words indeed. You can't put your life aside while your family gets used to the idea. If you are mature enough to enter the religious life, then you have all you need. Families do warm up to the idea in time. You can't put your life on hold until your family decide they want to accept your decision. You are no longer a child, you have to make your own way in the world. Yes, you love and respect your parents and pray for them. But as an adult, we have to make decisions that sometimes are contrary to what our parents may want. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TeresaAvila Posted January 9, 2007 Author Share Posted January 9, 2007 Thank you all for your kindness, advice and prayers. In regards my family, they support religious life, just they would be happy if I were not entering a cloistered community, my father and I have talked about the religious life and he wants what makes me happy, he came for a visit and he did go and meet with my Superior and Novice Mistress, and my Superior could not have said the more perfect words, she looked at my father and said "you are the one she is going to hold closest to her heart, and you and her will have a spiritual bond that is closer than you've ever been before" and it was as if she were speaking from my heart, for offering up my life as a religious nun is for their salvation and out of love for them, and my father wants what makes me happy, but he cant' right now bear with the cloister and my not being able to leave, and him being a protestant struggles to understand all of this and I completely understand and empathise with him but I do hold hope in my heart and place him and all my loved ones in our lords hands that oneday they will come to accept, but as for myself, I do feel our lord is calling me and I love my family dearly, and will always hold them in my heart, but it is the vocation that is most important, I am merely my lords instrument for the salvation of souls and it is out of deep love for him, holy mother church, and all those dear souls (including my beloved family) that I persevere in my "yes" and I must go where he feels I can best serve him and I just offer all of this up and trust in him completely! My community has been so supportive, and my superior advises me to write to my father and family often, and always maintain hope, for there was one of my sisters who's family abandoned her for 9 years and finally they came back and now embrace her vocation and are a great benefactor to the community, so I continue to pray and leave it all in our dear lords hands, and I Thank all of you for your prayers and support! God Bless You! [quote name='HisChild' post='1159428' date='Jan 8 2007, 09:49 PM'] Nicole, I have to respectfully disagree. There are some families that if you waited ten years, they would not be supportive. I don't know the situation in this case, but waiting won't necessarily make it better. And almost every sister I've spoken to, whose family were not supportive in the beginning are even closer to their religious child than they are to their non-religious child/children. Religious lifes seems to bring families closer, not further apart. Now, TeresaAvila, I don't know your situation or your family, but if you feel strongly to enter now. . .with prayer and time, your family will come around. And your life of prayer, sacrifice and service will only bless your family one hundredfold, giving them graces that you couldn't even imagine. God bless you, and I will pray for you as you make the decision that it right for you. [/quote] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathoholic_anonymous Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Regarding the reactions of family members, at Eastertime I visited the [url="http://www.corpuschristicarmelites.org"]Corpus Christi Carmelites[/url] in York. The superior there, Sister Ann, was an only child. When she decided to enter the convent at seventeen her father was very grieved and her mother was terrified. As she left the house on her last morning, her mother stood by the doorway with tears streaming down her face. Her cries could be heard all over the house. "I'm n-n-n-ever going to have any grandchildren! W-w-w-we'll hardly ever see you again!" Her mother was so upset that she couldn't even go to the train station with Sister Ann. "I was terribly upset," Sister Ann told me, "but as soon as I got on that train I felt pure relief. I knew I was going where I had to go." Her mother's fears weren't confirmed. Amazingly, some years after Sister Ann became a perpetually professed sister she was given the opportunity to adopt a small girl who was badly in need of a home. Shortly before her death, she went to visit Sister Ann at the house in York and said of her adopted daughter, "If she wants to become a sister too, I shan't mind a bit." When Sr Ann's father died, a copy of the verse "I'm the Daddy of a Nun" was found in his pocket. So you see - families do come round. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alicemary Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Teresa Avila, You family will soon be accepting your decision, trust the Lord fully in that matter. They don't want to lose you..when they visit the monastery a couple times, see you beaming with happiness and contentment and get used to the seperation all will be well. The gift of a contemplative vocation is hard for even hard core Catholics to understand. Just give your familly time. And when they realize that you will always be the person you are, even dressed in a habit, they will be at ease with your decision. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortnun Posted January 27, 2007 Share Posted January 27, 2007 (edited) TeresaAvila... you're mentioned in [b][url="http://www.stlouisreview.com/article.php?id=12236"]this article[/url] [/b]about your Pink Sisters! Edited January 27, 2007 by shortnun Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TeresaAvila Posted January 28, 2007 Author Share Posted January 28, 2007 Thanks Shortnun, I'm so glad they wish to remain there, for they have such a beautiful history there and that little neighborhood needs that beautiful house of prayer! Please pray for them! [quote name='shortnun' post='1178027' date='Jan 27 2007, 06:04 PM'] TeresaAvila... you're mentioned in [b][url="http://www.stlouisreview.com/article.php?id=12236"]this article[/url] [/b]about your Pink Sisters! [/quote] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DiscerningSoul Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 Hey kiddo, just keep praying, you know your in my prayers! My mother just most recently has given me a full blessing to enter whenever or whereever God will's me to go. I rejoice in her change of heart. Please know that prayer does work, maybe just not in our timming but God has a plan for you and you need not forget that my dear friend! Jessica [url="http://www.xanga.com/ADiscerningSoul"]http://www.xanga.com/ADiscerningSoul[/url] God's little lamb for the salvation of souls! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TeresaAvila Posted January 28, 2007 Author Share Posted January 28, 2007 Jessica, Thanks for your loving words, I greatly appreciate it and thank you for your prayers, know that I'm praying for you too!! (((HUGS))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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