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When Family Disapproves...


franciscanheart

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franciscanheart

Thank you.


I am not sure which order I will be joining but I am only seriously discerning with one order right now and that is the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal.

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Hughey,

I understand this pain.
My mom will stop speaking to me when I tell her I am entering. That's why Mother Wendy wants me to wait until it's absolutely necessary to tell her. For now I just try to be loving and pray alot. I will be praying for you too.

Piamaria

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cathoholic_anonymous

My parents [i]want[/i] to be understanding. They've gone from, "You're not being a nun!" (said in a jocular manner that barely disguised their fear and panic) to, "We'll support you in whatever you do. But it's not decided yet, is it? You haven't made up your mind, have you? It's not certain, is it? Anyway, even if you do become a nun, you're not going to be one of those ones who never go out. Are you?"

I don't want them to be unhappy. :sadder: It's difficult.

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Laurentina1975

[quote name='cmotherofpirl' post='1118830' date='Nov 13 2006, 10:30 AM']
I think you can expect a mixed reaction from many people, depending on their beliefs and relationship with the Church. All change produces anxiety.
[/quote]

Perhaps this is a challenge for growth and maturity for you. Like CM says all change does produce anxiety....but if your family is "angry", there may be a reason and you should communicate with them and ask them where the anger is coming from. A religious vocation shouldn't produce anger from your family if it makes you happy.

Just my thoughts.

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  • 1 month later...

I can understand how you are feeling, although my family is not so much angry, as my father especially is just hurt, can't bear to see me there and know that I wont' be able to come home, even now although we are miles apart, I can still visit if I needed to, and he is not comfortable with the idea of talking through the grille, and at this point he just doesnt' understand it all, and other family members are just feeling as if i'm wasting my whole life and feel as if the convent (and catholic faith) are interfering with my family, but they too just dont' understand it, and although this pains me very much to see them in so much pain as I love them SO much, but i know I must follow my heavenly fathers will and I give all of this to him and I have shared with my family and explained as best I can, and so now all I can do is leave it in our lords hands and continue to pray for them.. it is a very difficult time as my father still has not spoken to me, not even on christmas did he call which was very difficult, and I understand his hurt and concern, and it is out of love that I offer up this cross for him and hope that oneday he will come to accept, so I can understand how you are feeling very much, and my advice is to pray, and just try to share with them, but don't try to push all of this on them, give them time and place them in our lords hands!

God Bless You!

[quote name='hugheyforlife' post='1118546' date='Nov 12 2006, 10:03 PM']
I apologize if there is a thread like this already in existence. (If you know of one and would like to link me, I can merge this with that thread. :) )
What do you do when your family is ANGRY about your vocation? :idontknow:
[/quote]

Edited by TeresaAvila
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franciscanheart

Things are comfortable again with my family but I'm sure much of that has to do with that fact that no one will talk to ME about their feelings. Things are usually relayed to the person (be it me or anyone) through parents or siblings. :wacko:

Anyway, as of now, everything is fine. :) I continue to pray though because it is possible that one day I will have to say goodbye and they will be angry. :(

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I am so glad that your relationship with your family is improving Hughey. I will pray for you and also for Teresa who is having a most difficult time at the moment. God Bless you both and all those other discerners in the same position as yourselves :lol:

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cathoholic_anonymous

Hughey, my parents have now come round to the idea of religious life. At first they were set against it. Now they say that they will support me in whatever makes me happy, although it's clear that they're still saddened by the thought of me not being around so much any more. :sadder: I will miss them so much if I have to go. But I know God will take care of everything. I don't believe it, but I know it, and so I'm happier.

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Hughey and Catholic Anonymous, am SO glad your families are giving support and trying to understand more, that is a great blessing and I will continue to keep you and your families in my prayers. Jenni, Thank you SO much for your prayers!

Edited by TeresaAvila
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franciscanheart

The only hard part about them understanding more is that our relationships are getting stronger which will make it harder to leave! :lol:

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very True, but they can always come visit you! :)

[quote name='hugheyforlife' post='1162884' date='Jan 12 2007, 05:42 PM']
The only hard part about them understanding more is that our relationships are getting stronger which will make it harder to leave! :lol:
[/quote]

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Apparently, someone took a poll of everyone I know (family and friends) and concluded that I'm too smart to be a Franciscan. :blink: This, of course, is totally ridiculous. Yeah, I'm smart, but so what? I'm getting tired of hearing about how everyone else thinks I should use God's gifts. I wish my family would let me do the discerning.

OK. That's the end of my rant.

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VeniteAdoremus

[quote name='TrueImage' post='1164075' date='Jan 14 2007, 07:34 AM']
Apparently, someone took a poll of everyone I know (family and friends) and concluded that I'm too smart to be a Franciscan. :blink: This, of course, is totally ridiculous. Yeah, I'm smart, but so what? I'm getting tired of hearing about how everyone else thinks I should use God's gifts. I wish my family would let me do the discerning.

OK. That's the end of my rant.
[/quote]

Tell them about the seed that has to fall into the earth and die before it can bear fruit. If you offer up your intelligence to God, you get it back tenfold. And that "offering up" can happen in two ways: by using it for Him, or by [i]not[/i] using it for Him: literally offering it!

Nothing wrong with that, is there? :)

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