underOATH Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 [quote name='KizlarAgha' post='1109441' date='Nov 3 2006, 12:22 AM'] Sometimes, when I was feeling very self-destructive, I would beat the soles of my feet. It really hurts a lot, and is good release of that sort of negative energy. [/quote] Hey email me I'm praying for you chasing__safety@hotmail.com maybe we could talk on the phone sometime I've had a friend who had a problem like this b4 and I helped her through it maybe we could be friends and I could do the same for you and you could give me a chance to do something beautiful for Jesus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kosh Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 btw, going to mass/confession regularly is a good thing. Stay close to your friends and to God. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SanctifyMe Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 [size=3][color="#663366"]I will pray for you as well; I concur with the masses, talk to someone you trust ...Run to them if you have to. The first step is admitting that you need some kind of help, and then, give it over entirely to God, pray for the Grace to feel his healing love, pray for the courage to see that you are not alone, pray that with Jesus , you can carry your cross and overcome; know that all of us here are praying for you , and know most of all that... God really does love you more than you love yourself, ..'every hair on your head is counted', you are precious to God...and he can heal your heart. dont give up, Peace be with you,[/color][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaime Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 Take strength from the prayers being offered for you here and do two things with it. Be honest with your parents Get back with your therapist. Lexapro is not a magic drug. It is supposed to be an aid to regulate moods so that people can come to terms with whatever is bothering them. Kiz is right about the fact that after a while, people can build a resistance to one psychotropic drug. You might need a different dosage or a different drug all together. Your parents may freak out and "all hell will break loose". And without knowing them, there is a chance that they're reaction isn't helpful or healthy to your illness. But what you will need to realize is that their reaction is based on the terrifying thought of losing you forever!! Its probably the case that you are feeling ashamed about falling back into anorexia. That's natural and understandable but know that everybody stumbles. Everybody falls. Everybody needs help from time to time. Remember that the more honest you are with your therapist, the quicker you will finally beat this disorder. If your therapist's only answer is a different psychotropic drug, find another therapist. You're stronger than the anorexia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fearundercontrol Posted November 3, 2006 Author Share Posted November 3, 2006 No, I really can't tell my parents. My dad makes things worse for me enough as it is. He would flip out if he found out that I was doing this and it would just make everything worse. It would just be one more thing for him to yell at me about, and every time he yells at me it makes me want to cut. And that's one of the reasons why I don't want to tell my therapist--she'll probably tell my parents. I'm going to have to do this on my own, at least until I see my NP at the end of the month, and then [i]maybe[/i] I will tell her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
let_go_let_God Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 You're Dad only probably flips out because he cares for you. When I finally admited my past with self abuse to my father, he yelled and screamed, scared me right into my room, and I just burst into tears. After about a half hour straight of crying he came back in and apologised coming to the realization that this was my battle and yelling wouldn't help me anyway. Tell them and do not be afraid. Prayers God bless- LGLG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeavenlyCalling Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 Like John Paul the Great always said, be not afriad, God is with you no matter what you do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaime Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 [quote name='fearundercontrol' post='1109758' date='Nov 3 2006, 12:17 PM'] No, I really can't tell my parents. My dad makes things worse for me enough as it is. He would flip out if he found out that I was doing this and it would just make everything worse. It would just be one more thing for him to yell at me about, and every time he yells at me it makes me want to cut. And that's one of the reasons why I don't want to tell my therapist--she'll probably tell my parents. I'm going to have to do this on my own, at least until I see my NP at the end of the month, and then [i]maybe[/i] I will tell her. [/quote] Ok you need to understand something that is very very important. Your therapist will not tell your parents about anything that goes on in your sessions. That would be totally contradictory to your relationship with her! The therapist is there FOR YOU! Your dad my be paying the bill, but you are her priority not your parents. Holding back anything from your therapist is NOT GOING TO HELP. If your dad is flipping out and making things worse, then I would STRONGLY suggest that you, your dad and your mom go in together and do some sessions. talk to your therapist. talk to your therapist Talk to your therapist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortnun Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 [quote name='fearundercontrol' post='1109401' date='Nov 2 2006, 08:54 PM'] Well he told me to tell my counselor. [/quote] Will your SD go with you when you tell your counselor? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
underOATH Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 [quote name='fearundercontrol' post='1109758' date='Nov 3 2006, 01:17 PM'] No, I really can't tell my parents. My dad makes things worse for me enough as it is. He would flip out if he found out that I was doing this and it would just make everything worse. It would just be one more thing for him to yell at me about, and every time he yells at me it makes me want to cut. And that's one of the reasons why I don't want to tell my therapist--she'll probably tell my parents. I'm going to have to do this on my own, at least until I see my NP at the end of the month, and then [i]maybe[/i] I will tell her. [/quote] Like I said b4 If you wanna talk just email me chasing__safety@hotmail.com I understand most of what your going through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamiller42 Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 I am no expert in this field, but I have noticed what works. Find someone who has been through this to serve as leader. Find a buddy in a boat similar to yours. Led by the leader, the two of you (or more) make the journey through the storm. It can be done. It has been done. You are not the first to suffer these problems. Journey with those who know what it takes to triumph! [url="http://www.4woman.gov/faq/easyread/anorexia-etr.htm#4"]As this web site shows[/url], what you're thinking and feeling is a symptom of anorexia. Like a runny nose when I have cold is not me, the negative feelings you have are not who you are. The question you need to ask yourself, do you [i]really[/i] want to get better? I think you do. This means you will need the assistance of others. This is nothing to be afraid of. Even Moses needed help. [quote]10 So Joshua did as Moses told him: he engaged Amalek in battle after Moses had climbed to the top of the hill with Aaron and Hur. 11 As long as Moses kept his hands raised up, Israel had the better of the fight, but when he let his hands rest, Amalek had the better of the fight. 12 [b]Moses' hands, however, grew tired[/b]; so they put a rock in place for him to sit on. Meanwhile Aaron and Hur supported his hands, one on one side and one on the other, so that his hands remained steady till sunset. Ex 17:10-12 [/quote] I provide [url="http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/p.asp?WebPage_ID=303"]this web page[/url] in the hope you take advantage of their services. They are more qualified than us. They know the battle you are experiencing. They'll help you when your "hands grow tired." They can help you beat this! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groo the Wanderer Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 Heavenly Father, Precious Savior, Most Holy Sanctifier, hear the cry of your child in need. Be with her as she walks this journey. Take this cross from her. Bless it and break it so that when You hand it back to Your precious disciple, she will know that You are there with her to carry it alongside her. Make her journey short and smooth her path before her. Let her know that You are with her all the way and You will rejoice with her when she emerges victorious from this shadow. Amen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fearundercontrol Posted November 3, 2006 Author Share Posted November 3, 2006 [quote name='hot stuff' post='1109862' date='Nov 3 2006, 03:39 PM'] Ok you need to understand something that is very very important. Your therapist will not tell your parents about anything that goes on in your sessions. [/quote] That only goes so far though. There's an exception to that rule--if I am or am going to hurt myself or someone else, if I am posing danger to myself or anyone else. And I believe anorexia falls under that exception. [quote name='hot stuff' post='1109862' date='Nov 3 2006, 03:39 PM'] If your dad is flipping out and making things worse, then I would STRONGLY suggest that you, your dad and your mom go in together and do some sessions. [/quote] I've tried that and it never works. I clam up. They've gone in separately and it seemed to work at first, but I don't really knokw how much good it did in the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KizlarAgha Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 The hardest thing to do is tell your parents something you know will hurt them and upset and something that you know will make them angry. But that is precisely what you must do. I remember thinking my dad was going to shoot me when I told him about my personal issues, but he didn't. Our relationship is much improved because of it, and I am much healthier mentally. You must tell them if you want to stop living in fear and shame. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fearundercontrol Posted November 3, 2006 Author Share Posted November 3, 2006 Yeah but I know how it's going to end up because this has happened numerous times before. And it never ends up good at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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