MissScripture Posted October 29, 2006 Share Posted October 29, 2006 Yesterday, I got to babysit. I love babysitting, especially for really little kids. I was watching a two year old with one of my friends. And one of my friends was saying that she didn't want to have kids. I discovered that I honestly cannot comprehend that! For as long as I remember, I have wanted to be a mom. I automatically go into mother mode around little kids. I can't help it. I just don't understand NOT wanting kids! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted October 29, 2006 Share Posted October 29, 2006 i can. (i'm very excited for baby to get here, btw) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted October 29, 2006 Share Posted October 29, 2006 [quote name='MissScripture' post='1104086' date='Oct 29 2006, 12:08 PM'] Yesterday, I got to babysit. I love babysitting, especially for really little kids. I was watching a two year old with one of my friends. And one of my friends was saying that she didn't want to have kids. I discovered that I honestly cannot comprehend that! For as long as I remember, I have wanted to be a mom. I automatically go into mother mode around little kids. I can't help it. I just don't understand NOT wanting kids! [/quote] Ooohhh... babysitter... We'll talk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XIX Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 (edited) [quote name='Lil Red' post='1104088' date='Oct 29 2006, 12:10 PM'] i can. (i'm very excited for baby to get here, btw) [/quote] Literally speaking, isn't your baby as "here" as it ever gets? At least if the pregnant mother is the one who is saying here? : Edited October 30, 2006 by XIX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 (edited) I can understand not wanting kids. Kids are a big responsibility and they require a huge investment of time and love and money, and they create a significant area of vulnerability. I know that right now I couldn't handle having kids. Which is moot point at the moment anyway since I'm not married. Edited October 30, 2006 by Sojourner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ash Wednesday Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 (edited) What Sojourner said. Raising kids and being the guardian of these souls is one of the biggest, bravest things anyone can take part in. For some people, the very immense nature of the task is overwhelming, and if they were not raised around kids, chances are it's a completely foreign thing to them. And then there is the physical aspect of having the ability to withstand physical childbirth and rearing. So yeah, I can understand someone not wanting kids. For me personally, I'm not sure if I've just simply been down on my luck with love and that circumstances would change things -- or if I don't actually have a vocation and God knows me better than I'm willing to admit about myself -- but being that I'm now 30 and still single I'm beginning to have my doubts about whether or not I'm cut out for marriage and children, and that God may be keeping me from it for a reason. I think God often gives gifts and instincts to people that are called to having kids, but not everyone has that calling. Though our culture is very materialistic and anti-children in a lot of ways, it's not always out of "selfishness" that someone may be hesitant about having kids. Edited October 30, 2006 by Ash Wednesday Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissScripture Posted October 30, 2006 Author Share Posted October 30, 2006 [quote name='homeschoolmom' post='1104108' date='Oct 29 2006, 01:56 PM'] Ooohhh... babysitter... We'll talk. [/quote] Okay, I know that it's not the same thing. At all. The longest I've ever had to take care of the kids on my own is 24 hours. But still, I can't understand never wanting kids. That is why you're not supposed to have kids until you're married. Then you have help! (hopefully...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desertwoman Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 I don't want kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrossCuT Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 [size=1]Kids dont want you [/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 [quote name='MissScripture' post='1104613' date='Oct 29 2006, 09:02 PM'] Okay, I know that it's not the same thing. At all. The longest I've ever had to take care of the kids on my own is 24 hours. But still, I can't understand never wanting kids. That is why you're not supposed to have kids until you're married. Then you have help! (hopefully...) [/quote] And, the length of time, the late nights, the diapers, the money, and all of that is only part of parenthood. I've been privileged to watch several friends become parents, and witness the changes it's made in their lives. Here's some of what I have observed or heard from them. Having a child means that you hurt when they hurt. When the kids at school don't like your kid, you hurt. When your kid suffers a major defeat, you suffer it with her. The flip side of that, of course, is that when your kid does well, you can share in that as well. Kids mean that suddenly your life is vitally important to another person. I think we all have some sense of how we fit into other people's lives, and how our friends and parents would miss us if we were to die -- of the holes we would leave in the lives of people we love. Take that sense and multiply it 100-fold. My friends live life differently than they did before ... they're more cautious about what they do, because someone else relies on their well-being. Have a child means that suddenly you and you alone (as a couple, hopefully) are responsible for bringing up this child to love God rightly. I don't know about you, but I know that I don't love God rightly, and that I still have a lot of growing to do. The thought of trying to impart my faith to a child is ... terrifying. Or awe-inspiring. Mainly terrifying. Along those same lines, children force you to come face to face with your own sinfulness like nothing else will. Many of the sin patterns that you have in your life, your children will have, and they'll reveal to you areas in which you're weak, over and over again. I don't think any of these things are bad -- on the contrary, watching my friends become mothers and fathers, in the fullest senses of those words, has been a beautiful thing. I too love children, and I would someday, with the right man, love to have and raise a family. I applaud and admire those who have already embarked on that journey. And I'm sure that if God wills that to happen in my life, he will grant me the grace to do it. But ... I suppose in recent years I've slowly become more sensible of the conditions, and some of the romanticism of having a family has worn off. Where once that life is one I would have unquestioningly embraced, now I suppose I am more aware of the cost associated with it. Maybe it's because I'm 30 and now have to be a grown-up ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balthazor Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 Kids are great. But I really do not want any right now. So I understand it. Big investment. Emotionally and financially. Besides, babysitting is only a taste. It is only for a day or a few hours....try doing it 24/7 and then think about it. Hard work like any job doing it for a little while gives you a taste but the really work is staying in it for hours and hours and days and days. And there is no turning back with kids.... You can quit you job. You can not quit you kid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 [quote name='MissScripture' post='1104613' date='Oct 29 2006, 10:02 PM'] Okay, I know that it's not the same thing. At all. The longest I've ever had to take care of the kids on my own is 24 hours. But still, I can't understand never wanting kids. That is why you're not supposed to have kids until you're married. Then you have help! (hopefully...) [/quote] No... I meant... fresh babysitter blood.... It's a good thing... [quote name='Sojourner' post='1104717' date='Oct 29 2006, 11:44 PM'] And, the length of time, the late nights, the diapers, the money, and all of that is only part of parenthood. I've been privileged to watch several friends become parents, and witness the changes it's made in their lives. Here's some of what I have observed or heard from them. Having a child means that you hurt when they hurt. When the kids at school don't like your kid, you hurt. When your kid suffers a major defeat, you suffer it with her. The flip side of that, of course, is that when your kid does well, you can share in that as well. Kids mean that suddenly your life is vitally important to another person. I think we all have some sense of how we fit into other people's lives, and how our friends and parents would miss us if we were to die -- of the holes we would leave in the lives of people we love. Take that sense and multiply it 100-fold. My friends live life differently than they did before ... they're more cautious about what they do, because someone else relies on their well-being. Have a child means that suddenly you and you alone (as a couple, hopefully) are responsible for bringing up this child to love God rightly. I don't know about you, but I know that I don't love God rightly, and that I still have a lot of growing to do. The thought of trying to impart my faith to a child is ... terrifying. Or awe-inspiring. Mainly terrifying. Along those same lines, children force you to come face to face with your own sinfulness like nothing else will. Many of the sin patterns that you have in your life, your children will have, and they'll reveal to you areas in which you're weak, over and over again. I don't think any of these things are bad -- on the contrary, watching my friends become mothers and fathers, in the fullest senses of those words, has been a beautiful thing. I too love children, and I would someday, with the right man, love to have and raise a family. I applaud and admire those who have already embarked on that journey. And I'm sure that if God wills that to happen in my life, he will grant me the grace to do it. But ... I suppose in recent years I've slowly become more sensible of the conditions, and some of the romanticism of having a family has worn off. Where once that life is one I would have unquestioningly embraced, now I suppose I am more aware of the cost associated with it. Maybe it's because I'm 30 and now have to be a grown-up ... [/quote] Yeah, see I didn't really think about much of the gravity of this before we had kids. And I can't really remember not feeling this way. I passed on a trip with my husband to CA partly because our wills aren't up to date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 Marriage and children are our natural vocation unless God points us in another direction. Children make you grow up and leave your selfish bubble and view of life and sets you on the most amazing journey lasting the rest of your life. It teaches you love, courage, faithfulness, joy, despair, pain and heartbreak all rolled into one big mess. It is the adventure of a lifetime. If you are a good parent this quote applies to you " You can come as you are and leave behind what you can, but you may not stay as you were or do as you will." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 I love roller coasters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 [quote name='homeschoolmom' post='1104812' date='Oct 30 2006, 09:15 AM'] I love roller coasters. [/quote] I love that show!!!!!! Its a great prep for parenthood Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now