A0N7G Posted July 24, 2003 Share Posted July 24, 2003 Hi, Well i guess i am new, majority of you dont know me, but dont like some things i did already, but i wont get into that. I was directed to this site through someone i really respect and after reading on here for a while i decided no matter what the opinion of me is on here, i would write anyhow becasue i think that i can get some good answers to my problem, so here goes: I did some things, that i am not going to get into that hurt a lot of people and myself. mostly including a series of lies that i used because i was scared and for some reason knowing it was wrong thought lying would make things easier, well it didnt. obviously since it never does. But anyhow I know i was wrong and have been trying to fix it for a while, i did all i could to make things right with the people i hurt, there are still hard feelings but i feel i have done all i can do... i have gone to confession for all i did wrong,and was truly sorry, but for some reason i dont feel forgiven. My actions caused one of the people to turn away from his beliefs and i feel so guilty for it and am completly helpless. I dont know what to do, he wont talk to me and i am really worried about him. there is so much more to say but i will leave it at that and let you ask questions if u have them. thank you for your time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted July 24, 2003 Share Posted July 24, 2003 hi! i' m glad you decided to post, if theres anything we can do to help we will.. as for your situation, i really don't know what to tell you, since i don't have much to go on. however, i can follow up on what you gave us to follow... you ahve gone to confession? thats good. you have tried to pick up the peices? thats also good.. but you say that you don't feel forgiven? did you leave anything out in the confessional, many times we may feel like we didn't confess everything, thus, feeling like we're still carrying it....that could be it....or it could be that thru All that wrong, you knew it was wrong, and still decided to lie, so you will carry that pain for some time, and you say your trying to fix things? good, keep trying, sometimes its up to us to not only confess But put the pieces BAcK together, to try and make up for the damage that we did....however, you can do this in many ways, sometimes it just takes intense and devoted prayer to ask God to help out whoever was hurt through all this.... one way you can do to stop feeling guilty is also know and realize your mistakes, learn from them and most importatnly don't make them again....be ready for next time whenyou have an urge to lie that we don't and that we grow stronger from this and wiser.... we all make mistakes, but its up to us to cease in whatever caused us to fall in the first place....God knows you better than you know yourself, He loves yo u, Never, Ever doubt His Most Infinite Mercy, you ARE forgiven, His given you a second chance, because He understands we're not perfect.......but its up to you and each one of us to show how much we Love Him for that.... God bLEss and know you and all mentioned are in my prayers!! +JMJ ps. i hope this helped.....its just my advice...its up for grabs okay? i'm not an expert, nor have the answers, but you can count me as a friend who wants to help ya and praying for ya! (even though that sounded really corny, its TruE!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A0N7G Posted July 24, 2003 Author Share Posted July 24, 2003 Thank you so much, that was great advice. But there is still one problem, All my mistakes caused a person to seem to fall away from his faith. And that breaks me heart. It was an ex boyfriend of mine, and we met through God, and loosing faith in me made him loose faith in everything, and there is nothing i can do but pray, and i feel like i NEED to do something else Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted July 24, 2003 Share Posted July 24, 2003 pray, give it time and maybe somehow let your ex-know that your human that you make mistakes, that even though these aren't excuses, but that you knwo that you did wrong and you want to help win back whatever you lost..... its not going to be solved tomorrow or today, things take time, be patience, and pray pray pray!!! we can't do anyting on our own, but only in God!!! +JMJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyful Posted July 24, 2003 Share Posted July 24, 2003 two things: If you've gone to confession and confessed everything, then you were forgiven. You don't have to feel it for it to have happened. I, for one, have had a huge problem with not feeling forgiveness. Always Always Always remember, Catholicism is NOT a feeling! A good friend of mine once told me that! (thanks, Cmom) Secondly, I know it must be terrible to feel responsible for someone else leaving the faith, but I don't think you are as responsible for it as you think. If you have made an honest effort to help him come back to his faith than that's all you can be responsible for as it is now. I've done something like this before and I feel like I'll probably be culpable for it in purgatory, but I've done everything I can here and now. I've let go of feeling bad about it all the time because other people have freewilll too! I hope this helps! Feel free to talk to us anytime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A0N7G Posted July 24, 2003 Author Share Posted July 24, 2003 Thank you so much, I have confessed every second of the story, I just feel so guilty for all i have done, I feel terrible. and the problem is, I know i could bring the person back if he would give me the chance, but i just hurt him to badly He didnt exactly leave the faith he just questions his faith in anything and everything now. I am afraid you all know more about me than you realize Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nippy316 Posted July 25, 2003 Share Posted July 25, 2003 If you've gone to confession and confessed everything, then you were forgiven. You don't have to feel it for it to have happened. I, for one, have had a huge problem with not feeling forgiveness. Always Always Always remember, Catholicism is NOT a feeling! A good friend of mine once told me that! (thanks, Cmom) True--so true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyful Posted July 25, 2003 Share Posted July 25, 2003 I am afraid you all know more about me than you realize I don't understand what this means? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted July 25, 2003 Share Posted July 25, 2003 i know i'm alittle confused here...now can you help us out alittLe? :ph34r: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A0N7G Posted July 25, 2003 Author Share Posted July 25, 2003 A member has told the majority of my story under a different category, so i know how you all feel about it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted July 25, 2003 Share Posted July 25, 2003 :ph34r: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shrtnswtangl Posted July 25, 2003 Share Posted July 25, 2003 you've forgotten the most important part...have you gone to Him yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted July 25, 2003 Share Posted July 25, 2003 You've got the important part down--you went to Confession. You have been forgiven by God. But the people/person you hurt--they're human. Speaking from personal experience, I despise lying, its one thing I cannot tolerate. My senior year of college I broke off what I had thought was a good friendship because I found out that the guy was lying to me left and right. Once trust is broken it takes a long time to get that back. I still have not spoken to the person who lied to me, I can't be friends with him ever again, I just don't trust him. But, I have forgiven him. We, with our human emotions and faults, don't have that infinite mercy which our Heavenly Father does. It will most likely take a very long time for the guy you hurt to totally forgive you, and even after that you will never really be able to have a solid friendship with him because there will still be doubt and fear and mistrust. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A0N7G Posted July 25, 2003 Author Share Posted July 25, 2003 I realize that i will never be in contact with him again, and it breaks my heart. I still cant really figure out why i did what i did. But i definatly learned my lesson, truth is now what i strive for most. I want to let you know what i did, because i could probably get a lot better help. But I am extrmely ashamed of what i did. My story is told in the old post about whether or not we can be in love at this age. You can probably figure it out if you go there. But i must tell you some of the things in the post are not exactly true. Not that the person was lying but was just misinformed, obviously because i had lied so much he was confused I feel absolutly horrible right now, I must go...Thank you all for your help. God Bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted July 25, 2003 Share Posted July 25, 2003 I know who you are. Which is why I was as blunt as I was in my post. I obviously do not know all the particulars of the situation, but I know enough to know that what I said--my "advice"--is accurate for the situation. (If some things aren't "exactly true" maybe you should clear them up so people don't believe things that are untrue about you. One pack of lies is enough, I think, and if someone said something untrue about me I'd set it straight.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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