cantstopdancin9 Posted December 27, 2003 Share Posted December 27, 2003 Let's see who can post the funniest jokes! I promise I won't post the pink joke again lol. The winner gets a free cake! READY! SET! LAUGH! :rolling: :: :thatsfunny: :haha: :crackup: :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cantstopdancin9 Posted December 27, 2003 Author Share Posted December 27, 2003 Dear God, Did you mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? Norma Dear God, Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't You just keep the ones you have now? Jane Dear God, Who draws the lines around the countries? Nan Dear God, I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay? Neil Dear God, Thank you for my baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy. Joyce Dear God, It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about you that people are not supposed to say, but I hope you will not hurt him anyway. Your friend (but I am not going to tell you who I am) Dear God, Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up. Bruce Dear God, If we come back as something, please don't let me be Jennifer Horton, because I hate her. Denise Dear God, I want to be just like my daddy when I get big, but not with so much hair all over. Sam Dear God, I think the stapler is one of your greatest inventions. Ruth Dear God, I think about you sometimes, even when I'm not praying. Elliott Dear God, I bet it is very hard for you to love all the people in the world. There are only four people in our family and I can never do it. Nan Dear God, Of all the people who worked for you, I like Noah and David the best. Rob Dear God, My brother told me about being born, but it doesn't sound right. Dear God, If you watch me in church Sunday, I'll show you my new shoes. Mickey Dear God, We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday School, we learned that you did it. So I bet he stole your idea. Sincerely, Donna Dear God, I do not think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want you to know that I am not just saying this because you are God already. Charles Dear God, I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Tuesday. That was cool! Eugene Dear God, Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother. Larry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodsThespianChic Posted December 27, 2003 Share Posted December 27, 2003 I promise I won't post the pink joke again THANK YOU!!! I mean...no...that was a great joke... :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cantstopdancin9 Posted December 27, 2003 Author Share Posted December 27, 2003 I know, it must be one of yawl's favorites! lol. ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted December 27, 2003 Share Posted December 27, 2003 im getting flashbacks!! the pink joke!! aagghh!! :rolling: it was a favorite..... :sweat: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musturde Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 I don't remember that joke... musta been gone... :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 i need to go find some good jokes.... i'll be back... :runaway: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geetarplayer Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 These are punny! The quarry worker was about to swing his pick ax at the wall of rock when the pick ax suddenly yelled out! The quarry worker said, "Wow, a talking pick ax." They started talking and the quarry worker eventually said, "I'll bet it makes you feel pretty important to know that you can break up this marble better than we humans can, huh?" The pick ax said, "Gee, I never thought of it that way. I thought I was being taken for granite." A panda walked into a bar. He ordered a plate of french fries. When he was done eating, he took out a gun and shot the bartender. Just as he was about to go, a man asked him, "What'd you do that for?!" The panda opened a dictionary and pointed to the definition of panda: "Eats shoots and leaves." Jim wanted to enter the Pun Contest. He decided that, to better his odds, he would submit ten puns. Surely, he thought, at least one of them would win! But, unfortunately, no pun in ten did. :haha: -Mark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geetarplayer Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 Some folks say it was a miracle. Saint Francis suddenly appeared and knocked the next pitch clean over the fence. But I think it was just a lucky swing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
track2004 Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 Alright here's a good Pirate Joke: So a pirate walks into a bar and he takes a seat. The guy next to him says, "Woa, you're a for real pirate. I mean you have the eye patch and the hook and everything. I bet you have some great stories." The pirate was abliged to induldge the young man and began. (warning this wil lose a lil bc i cant type dialect ) "<pirate voice>Ok I'll tell ya some stories. Once when I was fighting another band of limey pirates I fell into the sea. I was swiming and started to climb back on me boat when a canon took off me hand. I kept climbing in spite of the injury and killed or wounded another five of theose mongrels." The young man at the bar, and a few others as well were all listening to him talk. "What about you're eye?" one of them questioned. "Well, son, I was out scrubbing the deck of me boat and as I looked up a bird pooped in me eye." The group of men just looked at him, "And you lost your eye because of it??" The pirate replied, "It was the first day I had me hook." :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 Alright here's a good Pirate Joke: So a pirate walks into a bar and he takes a seat. The guy next to him says, "Woa, you're a for real pirate. I mean you have the eye patch and the hook and everything. I bet you have some great stories." The pirate was abliged to induldge the young man and began. (warning this wil lose a lil bc i cant type dialect ) "<pirate voice>Ok I'll tell ya some stories. Once when I was fighting another band of limey pirates I fell into the sea. I was swiming and started to climb back on me boat when a canon took off me hand. I kept climbing in spite of the injury and killed or wounded another five of theose mongrels." The young man at the bar, and a few others as well were all listening to him talk. "What about you're eye?" one of them questioned. "Well, son, I was out scrubbing the deck of me boat and as I looked up a bird pooped in me eye." The group of men just looked at him, "And you lost your eye because of it??" The pirate replied, "It was the first day I had me hook." :blood: that one was bloody funny me boy!! :: :sweat: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JuCa Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 These are WAY better if I could actually say them... Okay, there were two apple pies baking in the oven. One apple pie said to the other apple pie....."man its hot in here" the other apple pie screamed "AHHHH a talking apple pie" haha... you can use anything with that...like besides apple pies in the oven....say two green beans or frozen chunks of meat...or tacos, so very tasty and good for you, What is a fish with no I? A FSH (sound it out...just say with no I...stupid yet funny) A grasshopper walks in to a bar and sits at the bar. The bartender says "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper says "What? You have a drink named Steve?" Two girls walk into a tanning salon. They say to the receptionist "two tans please". The receptionist says okay, fills out the forms...and asks "Are you two sisters". They say "No, we aren't even Catholic" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
traichuoi Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 it smells like updog in this thread... <_< Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiddkapps Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 Did someone already tell this one? I'm getting old so I kinda don't remember.... A bunny and a bear went in the woods to mushy mud pie. The bear turns to the bunny and says "do you have problems with mushy mud pie sticking to your fur?"The bunny says no. So the bear picks up the bunny and wipes his hiney. :D :D :D I cannot take credit...SouL told me that one. But it made me laugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foundsheep Posted December 28, 2003 Share Posted December 28, 2003 <------sneaks into creepy kids territory and taps mic....is this thing on? A horse walks in to a bar and sits at the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" <--------runs away! :loco: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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