magnificat Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 Ok, so I met with possibly my new SD today. Wonderful priest with experience with this sorta thing. Only thing is, is it weird that he tells me about other people's discernment (people that I know and things they're going through presently)? Also is it weird that he mentioned something I said to a friend of mine? Other than that little weird thing, he's great but I'm not totally sure what to do.... Advice anyone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruviel Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 hmm I'm really sorry, that sounds kinda strange that the priest would be open about what he's heard from others. Who knows who he'll be telling about your discernment. Ok I'm sorry, I do not wish to put you down, that's so wonderful that you have found a good priest though!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birgitta Noel Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 I've always assumed that SD was confidential, similar to counseling, or confession (though not bound by a seal). Perhaps you should ask him his views on this and then discern how you feel about his response. If he's betraying confidences, or what others think are confidences then that's a whole other issue.... Personally I wouldn't want a SD who talked freely about what we've discussed. I'd be fine if he wanted to comment in general, i.e., "Birgitta has really grown in her prayer life." But if he said something like, "Birgitta is struggling with adultry and self-hatred and has been neglecting her prayer life." I'd be . Note: Birgitta is not an adulterer etc! It's just an example... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruviel Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 BN has a good idea. Ask him his views and decide about how you feel about his repsonse. Good luck and God Bless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magnificat Posted April 27, 2006 Author Share Posted April 27, 2006 Ok...I just wanted to see what other people's experiences were in this area...I think I'll try to catch him after Mass tomorrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheresaMF Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 I've had priests cite other people's discernment as examples, but more along the lines of "one of the brothers in my novitiate class discerned that he was really called to the Trappists, so you see how God can lead you to one vocation through another" rather than current news of people I know. That would make me uncomfortable as well. I hope you get a chance to talk to him, and get a good answer! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MC IMaGiNaZUN Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 If my spiritual director made such a claim to me... Well i would voice concern. I would say I am sharing and seeking guidance in confidence. That is, i have confidence in you that you are genuinely sincere in your advice. I also have confidence that you will not reveal what i share. But my confidence is shaken. If you are sharing other peoples discernment processes with me, it makes me wonder if you are sharing mine. I need the reassurance that my confidence is in you is not in vain. SHALOM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birgitta Noel Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 [quote name='MC IMaGiNaZUN' post='962349' date='Apr 26 2006, 09:35 PM'] If my spiritual director made such a claim to me... Well i would voice concern. I would say I am sharing and seeking guidance in confidence. That is, i have confidence in you that you are genuinely sincere in your advice. I also have confidence that you will not reveal what i share. But my confidence is shaken. If you are sharing other peoples discernment processes with me, it makes me wonder if you are sharing mine. I need the reassurance that my confidence is in you is not in vain. SHALOM [/quote] and then you have to decide if you can trust him. ( I would hope that you could! He is a priest afterall! ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cappie Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 [quote name='magnificat' post='962255' date='Apr 27 2006, 12:27 PM'] Ok, so I met with possibly my new SD today. Wonderful priest with experience with this sorta thing. Only thing is, is it weird that he tells me about other people's discernment (people that I know and things they're going through presently)? Also is it weird that he mentioned something I said to a friend of mine? Other than that little weird thing, he's great but I'm not totally sure what to do.... Advice anyone? [/quote] Simple.....if you can get someone else....no spiritual directoe worth their salt would do what he has done Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birgitta Noel Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 [quote name='cappie' post='962483' date='Apr 27 2006, 01:36 AM'] Simple.....if you can get someone else....no spiritual directoe worth their salt would do what he has done [/quote] I stand corrected. Fr. Cappie is right, as always! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magnificat Posted April 27, 2006 Author Share Posted April 27, 2006 Ok I talked to him this morning and things are under control and it was more of a misunderstanding on my part. I don't want to get into details but it was more of my friend taking things to their logical conclusion I guess than anything he said. Re-reading over what I posted last night, it is less dramatic than I think it actually reads. And so without explaining my entire circumstance, things are cool and we're good to go. Thanks for y'alls help! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruviel Posted April 27, 2006 Share Posted April 27, 2006 sure! That's wonderful that it's all under control, I hope you enjoy having a good SD! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheOliverOrder88 Posted April 28, 2006 Share Posted April 28, 2006 Question: I asked my pastor about spiritual directors. It seemed to him that I was asking him to be mine...but that wasn't my real intent. Now, I don't want to offend and say "Well, I don't want you..." Oh well...I'll just ask my chaplain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magnificat Posted April 28, 2006 Author Share Posted April 28, 2006 Wait..was there a question there?? j/k Um, well, it might be easier to ask if he can recommend someone to you...that way he may be less likely to suggest himself? Or ask your chaplain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheOliverOrder88 Posted April 29, 2006 Share Posted April 29, 2006 I asked my chaplain. He just told me to ask the seminary. I think that's what I'll do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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