puellapaschalis Posted May 5, 2006 Author Share Posted May 5, 2006 Ok. I think I might be at a point where I can begin sharing a little of my visit, but I'm a bit nervous. Would anyone like to help me start with a well-placed question? I have to strike a balance here - I don't want to hog all the goodness that I received and not share with others who would benefit, but at the same time I don't want to bare my innermost heart online (much as you're all lovely, of course!). Help! Love and prayers, PP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortnun Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 Hmmmm....... here's a tool I've used with high schoolers (so maybe it'll be useful for those of us out of high school too) One word to describe your visit: Three words (can't include the one you used above): One sentance to describe your visit (you can use words you used above): Additionally, don't be nervous. I don't know if my questions were well-placed, but perhaps it'll get the ball rolling. Also, it's good that you don't want to share your soul over the internet. Do feel free to share as much as you'd like as we're all here to support and pray with/for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stlmom Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 Maybe you could just start factually and give us an overview of some of the activities in which you participated. Tell us a bit about some of the sisters, and then as you feel more comfortable you can share your impressions of the time spent. Yes, whatever you can tell us may encourage more on the phorum to consider the Benedictines-- and that would be my wish. God bless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puellapaschalis Posted May 8, 2006 Author Share Posted May 8, 2006 Here goes, then. The day starts early - Lauds is at 5:30am on most days. Afterwards there's a break of a little over an hour before Terce and Mass, after which the physical work of the day (Labora, as opposed to Ora) gets started. Then at a quarter to midday Sext is prayed, then lunch, and then None. After None begins the afternoon's work, then Vespers, which is followed by dinner and evening recreation. Compline and Vigils (in anticipation of the following day) is at about 7:20pm. It sounds quite clinical, like a school timetable. And in a certain way it is. But what reading about it on an internet forum doesn't adequately bring across is how [i]levende[/i] this structure, this rhythm is. What can only be tasted by actually moulding yourself to the monastic horarium is how living, how [i]vibrant[/i] it is. I don't mean that it's always sparking with an intense sense of joy and holiness - monastic life is tough, and the horarium is often the toughest bit - but that it gives a real sense of (to use a cliched phrase) sanctifying the day. We think of sanctifying as "making holy", which is of course right. But the [i]Sanctus[/i], the Spirit by which the monastic day is made holy, is a [i]life-giver[/i]. The horarium at Ruedesheim somehow enlivens the rest of the day, enlivens it, animates it. It doesn't necessarily make it a bed of roses, but it breathes life and purpose into it; the day becomes a sign of the radicality of the basic, fundamental Christian lifestyle - that in all things God may be glorified, whether by Latin plainsong or cleaning the floors. In between the Offices I spent most of my time in my room reading Scripture and practising Lectio, or simply resting (my body isn't used to that kind of pattern yet!). I had chats with a couple of the sisters - Sr. Benedicta (of California fame!) and I went for a walk one morning and had a wonderful discussion about faith, vocation and Benedictine community life. Sr. Lydia is a lady who is very easy to talk to, very approachable and whose laugh is infectious; our second conversation featured swapping stories of Where We Were When Benedict XVI Was Elected Pope amongst other things. I also met a few others (inluding the Abbess, very briefly), including Sr. Agatha, who is the guestmistress - a gentle and holy woman whose lack of English poses little problem when looking after guests like me who don't speak much German! Many deep impressions have been imprinted on my heart from my visit. It feels strange to think that this time [i]last week[/i] I was still there. Coming back home was such a shock: the world is so noisy! How on earth do we manage to think straight out here?! I'm not sure what else I can write here whilst still being coherent, so I'll stop here whilst I'm ahead (hopefully). I do hope that this is somehow useful and enlightening to some - and if anyone has some questions then feel free to ask either here or in a PM and I'll do my best to answer them. Love and prayers, PP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stlmom Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 So glad to see your post! You have a way of reflecting on your experiences without going all sappy about them or gut spilling, for which I am so thankful. Sounds like you had a lovely time. I have only a few mundane questions: How do these Benedictines support themselves? What is their relationship with the outside community? Are you more seriously considering this way of monastic life now? God bless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheresaMF Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 Puella-- Very very beautiful. I have not yet had a chance to [i]live [/i]with nuns, but it seems to me that what you describe and what I experience is LIFE being allowed to come to the surface through the horarium and the prayer. We tend to smother life out here by being too active, noisy, busy. As you said, "The world is so noisy! How on earth do we manage to think straight out here?!" (I don't know, that sounds kind of pretentious. I can't speak for your experience, certainly! Just a fleeting attempt to grasp the essence.) Please tell us more as you're able. God bless and Our Lady keep you! TheresaMF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puellapaschalis Posted May 10, 2006 Author Share Posted May 10, 2006 [quote name='stlmom' post='975522' date='May 8 2006, 11:00 PM'] So glad to see your post! You have a way of reflecting on your experiences without going all sappy about them or gut spilling, for which I am so thankful. Sounds like you had a lovely time. I have only a few mundane questions: How do these Benedictines support themselves? What is their relationship with the outside community? Are you more seriously considering this way of monastic life now? God bless! [/quote] Thanks for your message, it's great to get some support. I'm always conscious when describing my experiences that they shouldn't be overly flowery or honeymooney. Life isn't always like that, and religious life is no exception. During my stay I was in quite some physical pain and so [i]any[/i] illusions I might have entertained about the rosiness of life in a monastery (not that I've had much in the way of that since I stopped thinking that nun-life was comparable to the Sound of Music!) would have been sent packing quite quickly. The more I learn, the more I believe that religious life is harsh, raw, and capable of completely breaking someone who takes it on lightly. After all - my favourite two-word phrase again - religious are [i]eschatological portents[/i], signs of the life to come - life in the closest company and clearest vision of God. It's a heightened reality where our senses are replaced by "heavenly" senses; everything is closer, the good things as well as the bad things. Whilst the religious is still in [i]this[/i] world, the grace/burden of being such a sign is bound to be heavy on the individual. Hm, I've no idea where all that blurb came from. Anyway, to your questions. The community gets by by a number of methods. The most obvious is catering to visitors (the long history of the Abbey, tied so closely to the life of St. Hildegard) - there's an extensive book and gift shop. In addition, the Abbey owns extensive land which, like so much of the surroundings, has been cultivated as vineyards. Consequently there are wine products that are sold. There's also a trade in spelt products. Less visible are the crafts workshops - ceramics, artworks and goldsmiths. The community is also responsible for the maintenance and restoration of historic documents that pertain to the work of the German Bishop's Conference. Some - two or three, I think - of the nuns have an external ministry. I [i]believe[/i] that this is connected with hospital and/or prison ministry, but I don't know for sure. However, it's not the norm. There is a community of Oblates and of "Friends of the Abbey". As to the third question - once I get an email from something like god@heaven.com, I'll let you all know! Love and prayers, PP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stlmom Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 OK, what attracts you to the monastic life --- that you haven't already incorporated into your life as an oblate? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puellapaschalis Posted May 29, 2006 Author Share Posted May 29, 2006 [quote name='stlmom' post='977690' date='May 10 2006, 10:50 PM'] OK, what attracts you to the monastic life --- that you haven't already incorporated into your life as an oblate? [/quote] I've been offline for a variety of reasons, but I am sorting out my answers to this! Love and prayers, PP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stlmom Posted May 29, 2006 Share Posted May 29, 2006 Good to hear from you again--your contributions have been missed! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piccoli Fiori JMJ Posted May 29, 2006 Share Posted May 29, 2006 [quote name='stlmom' post='992304' date='May 29 2006, 08:51 AM'] Good to hear from you again--your contributions have been missed! [/quote]Indeed! I love hearing about these things from others Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puellapaschalis Posted May 30, 2006 Author Share Posted May 30, 2006 Thank you both for your kind words! PP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puellapaschalis Posted June 4, 2006 Author Share Posted June 4, 2006 [quote]OK, what attracts you to the monastic life --- that you haven't already incorporated into your life as an oblate?[/quote] After quite a bit of thought, I don't think that I can really answer this question as it stands. What I mean by that is that I can't think of something about monastic life that I haven't already tried to live out as an Oblate. It's the deepening, fulfilling and perfecting of all these things - regular, daily, communal prayer; manual work; [i]lectio[/i]; balance and moderation; *insert the rest of the Rule in here* - that I'm hankering after (divine callings notwithstanding ). Someone I once met told me that I was probably already a nun; I simply wasn't yet in a monastery. And whilst that statement can be twisted to mean something really rather dodgy, I could see what she meant. It's not that I regard things like acceptance, postulancy, novitiate and vows as rubberstamps, not at all; but perhaps in those who are called to religious life and for whatever reason take years to get there (by that I mean that they don't enter in their late teens or early twenties) [i]and[/i] do not totally close off their hearts to the possibility, a spiritual growth and formation nevertheless takes place in the time before their entrance. I don't know if that last paragraph made sense, so if it didn't to you, please say so and I'll try to clarify it a bit better. Anyway, perhaps that's what's going on with me. If I had to put my finger on one thing that I'm "looking forward to" is being a member of a community. Benedictines make a vow of stability - we join a particular monastery, not the "Benedictine Order" as such - and at the end of the Rule Benedict talks about the Good Zeal, saying (emphasis mine) [quote]They should practise fraternal charity with a pure love; to God offering loving reverence, loving their abbot with sincere and humble affection, preferring nothing whatever to Christ, [b]and may He bring us all [i]together[/i] to life everlasting.[/b][/quote] In heaven there is no marriage (I think - cf somewhere in Mark 12), but this passage suggests that the bonds of the monastery will endure in the everlasting. Now on the one hand this is a horrifying thought - anyone who's had any experience of living in community will know how downright irritating people can be when at such proximity (and everyone else can imagine it!). Does Benedict really mean that in joining this monastery I'm committing myself to live with [i]this lot[/i] until beyond the end of time? Jeetje.... Yet, whether we like it or not, in the life everlasting the Church will live in her complete perfection together with her Head and Lord; thus, whether we "like" The Guy In The Front Pew Who Sings Out Of Key All The Time, the chances are that we'll be stuck with him (and his singing) for all eternity. We are, whether we're Benedictine or not, already [i]vastgebonden[/i], securely bound to the entire Church, warts and all. The idea that Benedict's Rule spells this out for monastics simply reinforces the idea that religious communities are a microcosm, an image, a foreshadowing of the Church herself. Someone (Mother Theresa?) once said something like "I may be just a drop in the ocean, but the ocean would be less without my little drop." The notion that all of us are integral (perhaps necessary?) parts of Christ's body, Christ's Bride, is something I find very powerful. What better than to live a life that shows the world the reality which is to come? Right, having done all that thinking, I believe it's high time for me to have another identity crisis and wonder whether I shouldn't actually be a Dominican As ever, well-placed questions are welcomed. I don't claim to be right. Love and prayers, PP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortnun Posted June 4, 2006 Share Posted June 4, 2006 [quote name='puellapaschalis' post='996462' date='Jun 4 2006, 06:05 AM'] Someone I once met told me that I was probably already a nun; I simply wasn't yet in a monastery. And whilst that statement can be twisted to mean something really rather dodgy, I could see what she meant. It's not that I regard things like acceptance, postulancy, novitiate and vows as rubberstamps, not at all; [b]but perhaps in those who are called to religious life and for whatever reason take years to get there (by that I mean that they don't enter in their late teens or early twenties) [i]and[/i] do not totally close off their hearts to the possibility, a spiritual growth and formation nevertheless takes place in the time before their entrance.[/b] I don't know if that last paragraph made sense, so if it didn't to you, please say so and I'll try to clarify it a bit better. [/quote] Puella, my response is not in the form of additional questions, but of thanks. This part of your post (which you perhaps thought to be muddled) touched me greatly. You articulated the place where I currently am in my discernment--a place I have just recently discovered. It is encouraging to me to see the example of your life as a constant deepening of your vocation, in better attempts to heed that divine call. And, sometimes, the response of responding to that call takes months and years. It's beautiful to think of the ways He can form us outside the walls of a convent/monastery. And once we're in, we're already that much more open to His ways for us. He never stops working on us. That's a great message of hope for me, and your post echoes that hope. Now, as for it being time for a(nother) identity crisis--while I am partial to the Dominicans myself--I don't wish you to have anything but perseverence and strength in your continued journey toward the LORD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puellapaschalis Posted June 5, 2006 Author Share Posted June 5, 2006 It makes my heart flutter to hear this. Thank you so much for telling me. At the very least it suggests to me that I'm not completely nutty. Love and prayers, PP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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