franciscanheart Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 Do forgive me if this has been recently debated... In your opinion, is it acceptable for a woman to keep her "traditionally supposed to be" maiden name instead of taking her husband's? If not, is it acceptable for a woman to keep her maiden name in addition to her husband's? If she keeps her maiden name in addition to the new name, is it acceptable to then use it on a regular basis as a part of her last name or should it be like a middle name or confirmation name (where by it is only used when saying your complete name)? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kateri05 Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 well, the two do become one, which i think is the idea about taking your husband's name. i think, not on any deep theological level of course, but that its best if they do have the same name. of course, as the last of my family's line (Garcias), i tried to convince my husband to take MY last name but he wasn't going for it (after all, the man leaves HIS mother and father and clings to his wife so that the two become one flesh so, i just used it as an opportunity to submit to my husband and instead, made my maiden name my 2nd middle name. in addition, we agreed that all of our children would have my maiden name as their 2nd middle name. but then, thats just me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah_JC Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 But what if you're a school teacher, and you fall in love with a Mr. Butts? (the last name does exist) No way I'd do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
franciscanheart Posted February 13, 2006 Author Share Posted February 13, 2006 [quote name='Sarah_JC' date='Feb 13 2006, 11:18 AM']But what if you're a school teacher, and you fall in love with a Mr. Butts? (the last name does exist) No way I'd do it. [right][snapback]885772[/snapback][/right] [/quote] Seems kinda childish and petty though doesn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kateri05 Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 heehee a Seymour Butts? lol sorry, couldn't resist. besides, i'm with laura. you have to learn to submit in the little things or the big things become nearly impossible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
photosynthesis Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 When I get married, I want to take my husband's name, and I'd probably keep my own last name as a 2nd middle name. Plus, it would be cool to sign my name as C. K. M. (whatever his last name is). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 My boss uses her maiden name professionally, although she's taken her husband's name legally. Since if I get married it will be after having spent several years in my profession, it seems reasonable to me to weigh several factors into the decision, including what professional ramifications it could have, what his last name is, etc. I wouldn't do hyphenated. I think that's dumb. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 I've never been a fan of the more modern practice of keeping one's name. Granted, it's a cultural thing (Spain, for instance, practices very different naming traditions than ours), but it bugs me when a woman doesn't take her husband's name. It's not that there's anything intrinsically wrong with it...it's just...why? The only answers I can come up with are a certain attachment to one's own familiar name, an avoidance of confusing others (as is sometimes the case with anchorwomen who get married and don't want to confuse the viewers), and last but not least, a desire not to ascribe to the false view of the "male hierarchical society." My mother didn't want my dad's name...or her own...she picked a completely different name: Kenny. I call her Mrs. Murphy. I'm such a rebel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
franciscanheart Posted February 13, 2006 Author Share Posted February 13, 2006 [quote name='Sojourner' date='Feb 13 2006, 11:29 AM']My boss uses her maiden name professionally, although she's taken her husband's name legally. Since if I get married it will be after having spent several years in my profession, it seems reasonable to me to weigh several factors into the decision, including what professional ramifications it could have, what his last name is, etc. I wouldn't do hyphenated. I think that's dumb. [right][snapback]885793[/snapback][/right] [/quote] I've debated in my head such a matter... what if I become established in something with my own last name and then I get married? Would it be proper to use my maiden name for my own business practices? Is it then the money I am concerned about, my image being lost because of name confusion.... it hurts my head to think about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Adam Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 Aren't you suppose to call her mom? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaime Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 If I were to marry, I would like to take my wife's maiden name as my middle name. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kateri05 Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 what are the professional ramifications of taking your husband's last name? why can't they just get used to you as Mrs. someone? and i'm with Micah, it just makes me go "but why"? and i haven't heard a good enough reason yet! : Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kateri05 Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 hot stuff, that's an interesting idea.... may i ask why? just curious, is all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 [quote name='Brother Adam' date='Feb 13 2006, 12:36 PM']Aren't you suppose to call her mom? [right][snapback]885799[/snapback][/right] [/quote] I mean when I'm filling out forms and stuff. It always made me feel like my parents were divorced or something, putting down two names...until I filled out the address...then I felt like my parents were, in Dr. Laura's terms, "shackin' up." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Adam Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 yeah it makes you think "So you want to be married but you want to be independant...so which is it? American feminism. Trying to take the best of both worlds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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