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chivalry?


daugher-of-Mary

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daugher-of-Mary

Two of my (male) friends from the college like to take me and another friend out for dinner every month or two. The guys have been insisting on picking up the tab even though there is nothing (to my knowledge) romantic about it. I don't know what to do. I'm very impressed by the gentlemenly decourem, but I feel bad because they are college students, and by default, broke. :rolleyes: Thoughts?

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Aww, that is special. I have a guy friend who always insists on paying (totally platonic relationship) and I think it's awesome. But I insist on treating him to a taco sometimes. We always go to Taco Bell. :taco:

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[quote name='sweetpea316' date='Dec 20 2005, 09:04 PM']Aww, that is special. I have a guy friend who always insists on paying (totally platonic relationship) and I think it's awesome. But I insist on treating him to a taco sometimes.  We always go to Taco Bell. :taco:
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[color=red]NO TACO BELL!.[/color]

:maddest: :pinch: :maddest: :pinch: :maddest: :pinch:

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Daughter-of-Mary, perhaps you can pick up some of the cost of gas the next time you go on a trip or something. Or, make/buy dessert and invite them over after you go out to dinner sometime. It's very generous of them to do this for you and your friend. I am certain that they realize they're "paid back" in many ways, not the least of which is great friendships.

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If it's well understood that there's nothing romantic about it, affirm their gentlemanliness.
:)

You're providing a way for them to be proper men.

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Ave Maria Totus Tuus

[quote name='sweetpea316' date='Dec 20 2005, 09:04 PM']Aww, that is special. I have a guy friend who always insists on paying (totally platonic relationship) and I think it's awesome. But I insist on treating him to a taco sometimes.  We always go to Taco Bell. :taco:
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:clap:

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Guest JeffCR07

If you really feel like you are being a burden, just make sure that every time you go out, you offer to pay. That way, they will see that you aren't assuming that they will pay, and so aren't taking them for granted.

That having been said, if you offer and they still refuse, then let them pay - its good for men to get in the habit of being chivalrous (and it saves you some money) ;)

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Laudate_Dominum

Let a man be a man, that's how I see it. As a guy, I find it to be kind of insulting when a lady gets pushy about paying for stuff. It's like she wants to wear the pants or something. It should go without saying that the guy is going to pay, and any guy that insists or expects the woman to pay for anything isn't a real man.

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daugher-of-Mary

Thanks for the advice ya'll...I'll continue to offer to pay, but I certainly don't want to be one of those "pants wearing women" and will accept their kindness if they insist. One of the same two guys escorted me home on foot at 3 am after we went with a group to see Narnia, 5 miles in Pennsylvania January. Catholic gentlemen really do exist, ladies. ^_^

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Laudate_Dominum

[quote name='daugher-of-Mary' date='Dec 21 2005, 05:11 AM']Thanks for the advice ya'll...I'll continue to offer to pay, but I certainly don't want to be one of those "pants wearing women" and will accept their kindness if they insist. One of the same two guys escorted me home on foot at 3 am after we went with a group to see Narnia, 5 miles in Pennsylvania January. Catholic gentlemen really do exist, ladies.  ^_^
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awww.. yeah, I don't blame the ladies who feel the need to do this, I blame all the guys out there who know nothing of chivalry. :(
Guys need to learn how to ask the girl to dance, how to open doors, pay for things, etc.. How to be a man basically. As far as I'm concerned the man should be a good provider and protecter, love isn't about men and women being the same, but about complimentarity and all that.. But what do I know. :ninja:

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daugher-of-Mary

[quote]How to be a man basically. As far as I'm concerned the man should be a good provider and protecter, love isn't about men and women being the same, but about complimentarity and all that.[/quote]

Yes, yes, yes...we were intended to compliment eachother. God is such a good designer. :D: Not only is chivalry rare, but I think women also have to relearn the art of nurturing. Society has made such a mess of the differences God made between men and women. :annoyed:

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Laudate_Dominum

[quote name='daugher-of-Mary' date='Dec 21 2005, 06:57 AM']Yes, yes, yes...we were intended to compliment eachother. God is such a good designer.  :D:  Not only is chivalry rare, but I think women also have to relearn the art of nurturing. Society has made such a mess of the differences God made between men and women.  :annoyed:
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amen.. :cool:

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I encounter this all the time! It is almost as if the other party can not accept that you are being genuinely sincere in your action to pick up the tab.

As for my girl friend and I we split on things. We have been dating for 2.5 years now and it would seem to be lop sided to have her not pay for anything and I would be broke.

I think that who ever invited the other one should pick up the tab. Like I got tickets to Paul McCartney 2 months ago and paided. But when she wanted to see Brooks & Dunn she paid.
Mind you it seems to work out I pay for all the expensive stuff!
HAHAHA!

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