Cow of Shame Posted January 9, 2006 Author Share Posted January 9, 2006 [quote name='Sojourner' date='Jan 9 2006, 12:01 PM']No wonder your cat is so skittish around people. [/quote] At least I don't eat my pooch slathered in butter. Do you garnish your dog dishes? At least have the decency to eat him all at once, rather than one leg at a time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 [quote name='Cow of Shame' date='Jan 9 2006, 04:10 PM']At least I don't eat my pooch slathered in butter. Do you garnish your dog dishes? At least have the decency to eat him all at once, rather than one leg at a time. [right][snapback]850714[/snapback][/right] [/quote] Hey, don't knock it until you've tried it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cow of Shame Posted January 9, 2006 Author Share Posted January 9, 2006 What? Slowly eating a creature, one limb at a time? True, I wouldn't know what to do with an entire slaughtered pig, but I can't say I'd want a crippled hog hobbling about the place either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 Nothing like fresh meat, I'm sure you'll agree. Particularly if it's slathered in butter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rick777 Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 mmmmmmmmmmmm, butter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stargirl3:16 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Hello, how can I not help you? [img]http://spamusement.com/gfx/39.gif[/img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cow of Shame Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 [img]http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c398/Cow_of_Shame/soccer.jpg[/img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stargirl3:16 Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Why they all want you... [img]http://spamusement.com/gfx/295.gif[/img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cow of Shame Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 [img]http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c398/Cow_of_Shame/untitled2.jpg[/img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philothea Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 [url="http://www.officeslang.com/"]Office Slang[/url] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tojo Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 [img]http://www.toothpastefordinner.com/090305/beige.gif[/img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cow of Shame Posted January 12, 2006 Author Share Posted January 12, 2006 (edited) [img]http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c398/Cow_of_Shame/blindball.jpg[/img] ...thanks for the reminder about 'toothpaste'. I hadn't been there in ages, and probably wouldn't have been able to find it again.... Edited January 12, 2006 by Cow of Shame Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cow of Shame Posted January 14, 2006 Author Share Posted January 14, 2006 [img]http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c398/Cow_of_Shame/and-the-lord-said.gif[/img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tata126 Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 [quote name='Cow of Shame' date='Jan 9 2006, 10:15 AM']I can only assume Peets is some sort of coffee.. ------------- Doggy Dearest, Being a reasonable and fair person I'm willing to work with you on this, but if your heart's set on sticking around we still need to see a few changes made. You did real well on the barking and most of the neighbors are speaking to us again, except the jerk with the hot tub. These are a few points to focus on: Firstly, the Barbie doll issue. I know the kid is forgetful and sometimes leaves her bedroom door unlocked. It truly smells of elderberries to be a hard*ss, but I'd appreciate if you didn't swallow the body parts. If you could just spit 'em out it would avoid the whole morning-after trauma thing. By the next day chances are I've forgotten it ever happened and I'm simply not equipped to encounter pink hands and feet sticking out of your shinobi when I stoop to do my civic duty. Especially not before my first cup of Peets. You may have noticed we're not fanatical about hygiene. Personally, I don't care if you lick the kitchen floor, or the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. They get thoroughly cleaned anyway. However, if you must eat the cat puke please leave me a clue where it was, so I can shampoo the carpet when I get home. Since you're such a genius, the bathrooms are off-limits. Period. Even though I put the goshdarn bin in a cabinet, with a child-proof lock, you still managed to cram your long pointy nose in the crack and get the used tampons. (See morning-after trauma thing, above). Which brings me to the dirty underwear. My bed is off-limits too. Remember? Licking the panties is disgusting enough. When you hoist them up on the bed and lick them it makes a nasty, soggy, stained patch on the cover. Stay off the bed and also try not to drag them around the rest of the house when we have guests. The TV room is a cool place for you to hang out. It warms the cockles of my heart to gather the family round of an evening, you included. One thing I was wondering, is there any way you can make less noise when you lick your privates? Clearly, routine maintenance needs to be done and you are most attentive to the task. I wouldn't want to deny you the pleasure of a job well done, but the incessant *glop, glop, glop* does tend to detract from our viewing enjoyment. The New Year's coming up. Let's see what we can do, OK? [right][snapback]850333[/snapback][/right] [/quote] That made me laugh so hard I snorted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cow of Shame Posted January 14, 2006 Author Share Posted January 14, 2006 I thought the 'glop, glop, glop" was highly accurate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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