Is dating a hindu guy wrong?

[christaddict]

If I were in your situation, My mind would say to the heart, "NO WAY". Crush is ephemeral and it's foolish to stick to that. I am in India and see all sorts of religions here. But, I would never consider a Hindu as a life partner. And thinking that I can change the person through my "evangelical power" is equally foolish.

I would only date someone who is strong in Catholic faith!

[Cam42]

Interesting question.

What you are talking about is called "disparity of cult." Properly speaking this deals with marriage, however, I think that if we look to what the Church teaches on marriages with this issue we can see where the end of dating a non-Christian (Hindu) must lead.

[quote name='CCC #1637']In marriages with disparity of cult the Catholic spouse has a particular task: "For the unbelieving husband is consecrated through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is consecrated through her husband." It is a great joy for the Christian spouse and for the Church if this "consecration" should lead to the free conversion of the other spouse to the Christian faith. Sincere married love, the humble and patient practice of the family virtues, and perseverance in prayer can prepare the non-believing spouse to accept the grace of conversion.[/quote]

Since I happen to think that dating is a direct pre-cursor to marriage, I would say, are you prepared to deal with your Hindu boyfriend in this manner, in regard to the Faith? Naturally, this is to be done with the dignity of the person and understanding his sensibilites, but this requires even greater circumspection than say a Catholic and Protestant marrying.

The Church actually teaches this:

[quote name='CCC #1634']Difference of confession between the spouses does not constitute an insurmountable obstacle for marriage, when they succeed in placing in common what they have received from their respective communities, and learn from each other the way in which each lives in fidelity to Christ. But the difficulties of mixed marriages must not be underestimated. They arise from the fact that the separation of Christians has not yet been overcome. The spouses risk experiencing the tragedy of Christian disunity even in the heart of their own home. Disparity of cult can further aggravate these difficulties. Differences about faith and the very notion of marriage, but also different religious mentalities, can become sources of tension in marriage, especially as regards the education of children. The temptation to religious indifference can then arise.[/quote]

The Church is clear that it is not insurmountable, but there are real difficulties. If you are willing to confront those and not fall into indifference, then I would support your dating this guy.

[tojo]

[quote name='Azriel' date='Dec 5 2005, 10:47 PM']Why?
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Well, I've heard of a lot people converting for their spouse and not becasue they truly believe in Catholicism, and we already have plenty of Catholics who don't believe in our Faith. Howveer, I am sure that many people who convert after marrying a Catholic are doing so genuinely, I'm just unsure how great the proportions are.

[christaddict]

Prayers

[argent_paladin]

1. As phatcatholic pointed out, it is definitely not a sin in itself to date a non-Catholic. But before answering whether it is prudent, you must first ask if it is prudent to date anyone one doesn't think one would marry. Dating is ordered toward marriage. It is a way to get to know the other person better, to judge whether that person would make a worthy spouse. It is not just for pleasure or to have a good time. Therefore, if you judge that you couldn't marry a non-Catholic, you shouldn't date one.

2. But, if you have fully understood the difficulties of marrying a non-Christian (know that divorce rates are significantly higher) and he understands that you are not marrying him because you are indifferent but because you love him despite his not being Catholic, then you should move forward. But he has to be aware that you pray for his conversion daily, will raise his children in a religion that he doesn't believe and you will not compromise your beliefs. That is usually very hard to take. And you have to be 100% sure that he understands and accepts these things, because the burden of Catholic formation of your children is on you. It is difficult enough to raise good Catholic children when both parents are together, it is much harder when the father doesn't go to Church or believe in Jesus. It can cause a child to question his beliefs at a very young age (or lose respect for his father).

Generally, you should listen to your parents, who love you. And you should not treat those you date different than you treat those you would consider marrying. That distorts the meaning of marriage and can lead you astray.

[Ash Wednesday]

A lot of Catholics marry non-Catholics, but that's not the same as being non-Christian. I think we might want to differentiate to avoid confusion, as Creepy has specifically brought up non-Christian.

[tojo]

[quote name='Ash Wednesday' date='Dec 6 2005, 01:14 PM']A lot of Catholics marry non-Catholics, but that's not the same as being non-Christian. I think we might want to differentiate to avoid confusion, as Creepy has specifically brought up non-Christian.
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I agree, I think the Church doesn't absolutely forbid it because of the problems that would cause, especially in mission countries, but it is definately not to be preferred.

[CreepyCrawler]

thanks for your thoughts, guys. you are all so smart! and no, i am not in love with gandhi. he just happens to be someone i really look up to!

[avemaria40]

Half of my RCIA class had converted to Catholicism b/c they were married to Catholics, and they really did so genuinely. I'm undecided about interfaith dating, b/c, there is always the possibility of conversion (though it shouldn't be the sole focus) and it can work, at the same time, I do want to find a nice Catholic boy to marry, mostly because of love for Jesus (who is the absolute Love of my life, and if a guy I was into didn't love Him, I'd feel sad because He is my Life, and also, if I marry someone who is a practicing Catholic, he will be more likely to share my beliefs about sexuality and morality which are so important to me. I'd definetely say pray about it and see what God wants. Also, I know I'm hijacking, but I just wanted to say I like your Ghandi avatar, he was such a cool person

[Cath]

This is my first time to date a hindu guy and i am Catholic.

Well i could say that, religion really do holds us back in what our heart wants, and that is so sad and depressing.

He's indian and i'm a filipina. Anyway i am saying that if u love someone, go for it. We are in a generation where we can express ourselves freely, and i can shout out loud that i am happy, i love this man, and we're not doing anything that could step anyone or anything. Ditch those f*cking cultures, naysayers, ditch those caste and sometimes u really have to ditch the tag of ur religion.

Religion is like many fingers, pointing in one sun. We're praying and worshiping the same GOD, and we just have our own ways of doing it.

Let there be love, and go with the flow of nature. You're happiness is ur choice, why worry about the future? when all you can change and do something is today? At the end of the day, i am telling u that those people/naysayers/bashers doesn't even care, so why does their opinions should matter?

 

When u love someone and whatever culture or religion he/she may come from, RISK should always be a choice. Or else you wouldn't know whatever possibilities could happen along the way. You can be happy, you can be sad, but u can never tell. CHOICE IS YOURS TO MAKE.

 

[Tab'le De'Bah-Rye]

I think many get crushes and mistake it for love. Crushes feel right but the compatibility scales are way off.

[Norseman82]

There are so many good Catholic guys looking for good Catholic wives - what's the matter with dating one of them?

Edited January 18, 2018 by Norseman82

[zabbazooey]

I'm coming home to the Church and married to an atheist. Which I think is more complicated than a Hindu. As long as you love him and he's accepting of your religion I don't see a problem with it. Just make sure you're on the same page when it comes to raising children. Mine won't let me take ours to church or get baptized till he sees I'm serious about Catholicism. 

[MIKolbe]

welcome home! 

[Seven77]

Interesting topic. I'm also Indian. I know of a woman, family friend, who married a Catholic and subsequently became Catholic herself. It's possible if you say that he's open-minded, that he could become convinced of the Truth of Catholicism. 

I think that it is problematic that Hinduism is kind of a relativistic religion, and that some do eventually come to believe that Jesus is God, but God among countless others.

 You can date this guy but be serious of your own faith-- and remember, if you do marry him, you must have your kids grow up in the Catholic faith and have a Catholic wedding. I know of another family friend who married a Muslim man… He was cool with having their son grew up in the faith.

For all their errors, there are elements of the Truth in all religions.  When I went to a Hindu wedding once, I was struck by a lot of what I heard in their ritual about the indissolubility of marriage, one woman,and one man, that is laid out by their religious texts.  It was really beautiful. 

 Just some thoughts…