Is dating a hindu guy wrong?

[CreepyCrawler]

Hey everyone, haven't posted on here in awhile. I'm having some emotional trauma right now. I've fallen in love with a very tolerant-of-all-religions Hindu guy and I really want to date him but feel like it would be wrong to date him knowing that my family wouldn't accept him. I also don't want to end up compromising my beliefs (as in, having a Hindu and a Catholic wedding ceremony or raising my kids anything but Catholic), so I've said no but it's so hard because I really do love him a lot. This poll I guess is just to see what other people think. I've had some of my non-Catholic Christian friends tell me it's a sin to date someone who's non-Christian but I don't believe it. I believe that you shouldn't marry someone who wouldn't raise your kids Catholic but dating isn't necessarily wrong. Anyway, just wanted to see what you thought since this is such a distressing topic right now for me.

And hi, by the way, to everyone since I haven't been on here for about 6 months!

(okay, I just saw that I messed up the choices of the poll so the choices are now yes or no, not yes, no, maybe)

[Socrates]

My history professor in college was firmly convinced that Hinduism is a Satanic religion.
I've read some stuff about it, and it definitely has dome very disturbing elements. Definitely not at all compatible with Catholicism!

[Deleted because it could too easily be read as offensive. I'm not racist against Indians, but do find much of Hindu culture wrong and distasteful.]

I'd recommend dating a nice German/Celtic guy!

Edited December 6, 2005 by Socrates

[morostheos]

I said that it's wrong, but I certainly feel your pain. I have been in a very similar situation before, and I still pray daily for his conversion. I think it's best to exercise restraint and offer up your sufferings for his conversion. It just doesn't make sense to start dating a non-Christian if you're serious about creating a domestic Church at home. Plus there's the whole meaning of the sacrament of marriage that simply doesn't exist for the spouse in a non-Christian/Catholic marriage.

[morostheos]

btw, welcome back! long time no see I hope you stick around!

[photosynthesis]

[quote name='Socrates' date='Dec 5 2005, 08:44 PM']And how any woman can be attracted to a Hindu dude is beyond me!  (But I'm a guy, so what do I know?)
They all remind me of Apu!

I'd recommend dating a nice German/Celtic guy!
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charity is a quality I find attractive in a man

[CreepyCrawler]

First of all, I am Indian and I find your comment offensive.
Second of all, he is an amazing person and one of the best people I know, even if he's not Christian.
My question is more whether or not it's wrong to date someone simply because they aren't Catholic. So please answer that and don't judge or you'll come off sounding really ignorant


[quote name='Socrates' date='Dec 5 2005, 08:44 PM']My history professor in college was firmly convinced that Hinduism is a Satanic religion. 
I've read some stuff about it, and it definitely has dome very disturbing elements. Definitely not at all compatible with Catholicism!

And how any woman can be attracted to a Hindu dude is beyond me!  (But I'm a guy, so what do I know?)
They all remind me of Apu!

I'd recommend dating a nice German/Celtic guy!
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[Socrates]

[quote name='CreepyCrawler' date='Dec 5 2005, 08:54 PM']First of all, I am Indian and I find your comment offensive.
Second of all, he is an amazing person and one of the best people I know, even if he's not Christian.
My question is more whether or not it's wrong to date someone simply because they aren't Catholic. So please answer that and don't judge or you'll come off sounding really ignorant 
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I'm sorry.

Indian women are very beautiful. (Especially if they're Catholic.)

[Thy Geekdom Come]

You wouldn't happen to be in love with the dead one in your avatar, would you?

I think that dating a Hindu might not be intrinsically wrong, but their are potential issues of scandal that could be involved.

First, he would have to know that before any resulting marriage (and you require marriage) would necessitate his conversion prior to the fact.

Second, he would have to know why.

Third, he would have to understand that the conversion had to come from inside himself...it can't be an empty action just to be with you.

Further, you would have be be extremely careful not to put any limits or separations in place between yourself and the faith.

There are probably more factors, but I'm not sure.

[Tink]

[color=#ff0066]Okay well I've never been in your situation but I've thought and prayed about it quite a bit and this is what I've found. I think the way you've phrased your question is interesting.... 'Is dating a Hindu guy wrong if I'm a Catholic girl?' Certainly there is nothing wrong or sinful about it, especially if you don't plan on marrying him (though that in itself defeats the purpose of dating- but that's another story). But perhaps the question should be phrased 'Is dating a Hindu guy wrong [i]for me[/i] if I'm a Catholic girl?' Personally, as I've grown in Christ, I've realized that one quality of a good husband is that he's Catholic, simply because a marriage is a special relationship that will help you come to know Christ more fully. I believe that as females we should be encouraged and challenged by the males around us, husbands most importantly. How is your husband to challnge you to grow in Christ and seek deeper insights in the Catholic faith if he himself believes something altogether different? I'm years away from marrying, but even now I see that in order to make the relationship what it is intended to be, and live as a truly 'Catholic girl', I must find a man who is on a similar level of faith as I, so that we may help and challenge and inspire each other in our walk of Catholicism. So, I suppose it's not a matter of what's right and wrong, but rather what qualities you're looking for in a truly holy marriage.

Just my personal view on it.[/color]

[Ash Wednesday]

I don't think it's a sin to date a non-Catholic, you know, getting to know someone. The Church does allow mixed marriages, so long as the children are raised Catholic and some sort of attempt is made to draw the non-Catholic spouse to conversion. But like moresthos said, the marriage to a non-Christian is valid, but not sacramental.

So as far as it being right or wrong to date a non-Catholic, I don't think it's wrong but I think it can be risky. In the long haul, I personally think couples are better off when they are both Catholic. Miracles and conversions do happen, and mixed marriages can work, but I see so many devoted Catholics where one parent is a "holiday Catholic" or of no religion, and the devoted Catholic parent works to raise the kids in the faith, but they see the lapsed parent and they wonder, "if dad doesn't go to church, why should we?"

In the end, I think it's something you will probably have to pray about and decide for yourself as you might get different and muddy answers on here. Good luck to you!

[peach_cube]

I said no. But it would be difficult and I would advise against it. Ones religious philosophy is huge in any close relationship, perhaps vital in marriage. Differences most often result in termoil and anguish. This is also something that might not seem like a big deal to him, but if the relationship became more serious it would become much more important to you. You cannot count on him changing for you. However, there is no harm in getting to know someone better and evaluating further if they wish to change.

[Nathan]

Many a convert to Catholicism comes as a result of Catholics dating non-Catholics.

[Matty_boy]

Bad idea Nathan. Don't EVER date a person and say "I could change them."

Don't expect the Hidu guy to kill spiders and cockroaches and other little pests around the house for you.

[tojo]

[quote name='Nathan' date='Dec 5 2005, 09:51 PM']Many a convert to Catholicism comes as a result of Catholics dating non-Catholics.
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Such conversions seem suspect to me.....

[Azriel]

[quote name='tomasio127' date='Dec 5 2005, 10:20 PM']Such conversions seem suspect to me.....
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Why?

I've chimed in on this issue many times as I, myself, married a non Catholic.

My Grandmother married a non Catholic - who converted a few years into their marriage. They were married 52 years.

My Mother married a non Catholic who converted a few years into their marriage. They have been married 38 years.

As far as dating someone non Catholic - I don't believe in my heart that it is wrong. Pray a lot about it. Discern what God wants from you. In my case, I was led to marry someone non Catholic.

God Bless.