Read: Prevalence Of Couples Living Together

[Frankcdnj]

jmjtina,

I could not have said it better myself. We are all sinners but not to the same degree. I talk with people who are living together or have relations outside of marriage to help them and NOT judge them. Remember those without sin shall cast the first stone. Well, you had better believe it will not be I.

Plus, the sins of the world result in chastisements or punishment. As our Blessed Mother said at Fatima: "War is a punishment from God for sins !"

And we are all paying dearly for the free love that has come upon our world.

We are above the animal kingdom because we have free will to make a choice between good and evil. And it would be nice if people used the gifts God instilled in them at birth and throughout their lives.

[Lil Red]

Kilroy and Frank, no offense taken. ;)

[Frankcdnj]

Thank you Lil Red, that makes me feel better!

And you may like this. I met a man who told me he married a virgin bride and divorced her 3 years later. The reason being she did not like normal/regular sex, she thought it was dirty. So, the next woman he married he had relations prior to marriage. And they have been married for 14 years.

So, there it goes to show you that on rare ocassions what the church feels is best is not always best for everyone.

Again, I do not condone his actions but then again in the same breath I can not blame him. This is a very touchy issue for me.

[Norseman82]

And you may like this.  I met a man who told me he married a virgin bride and divorced her 3 years later.  The reason being she did not like normal/regular sex, she thought it was dirty. So, the next woman he married he had relations prior to marriage.  And they have been married for 14 years.

Keep in mind too that unless his first wife has died or his first marriage was not a marriage recognized by the Catholic Church or he had an annulment he is living in a state of adultery......

So, there it goes to show you that on rare ocassions what the church feels is best is not always best for everyone.

Now I have to add something to this.....

I could easily say that cheating on my income taxes, or statutory rape, or aborting a child is best for me, if you want to carry that stance to it's logical outcome.

Edited December 7, 2003 by Norseman82

[Frankcdnj]

You are sharp! I neglected to mention the man was granted an annulment since the church viewed sexual relations a necessary part of a marriage.

Now I have to add something to this.....

I could easily say that cheating on my income taxes, or statutory rape, or aborting a child is best for me, if you want to carry that stance to it's logical outcome.

Yes, you are right but I did not say the church was wrong very much, this could be 1/100 of a percent that marrying a virgin did not work. He said he did think of marrying another virgin or dating a woman whom was not a virgin and asking both how they thought about sex. But I am getting off the issue aren't I.

So, say you had a first child who was mentally challenged, you then decide to abort the next fearing it maybe the same. Obviously that is serious and a grave sin. You can not say that the church is wrong regarding abortion in this case because you never gave the child the benefit of the doubt. Plus, regardless of the child's condition it would be murder.

You are right, never can a sin be regarded as a correct choice no matter what the circumstances.

Good Job Sherlock, I made a faux paus!

And I showed my fallibilty, I must go and hide. Just kidding!

Seriously, that was a good call.

Edited December 7, 2003 by Frankcdnj

[superkiddo7]

Saying that a study says something is different than a study actually saying that. Anyone can twist the words of research. It's called propaganda.

[cmotherofpirl]

Saying that a study says something is different than a study actually saying that. Anyone can twist the words of research. It's called propaganda.

Fortunately this study isn't propaganda.

[Frankcdnj]

I see this study as correct. My goodness, everyone I know is shacking up with their lover as they put it. I have never and never will do this. But then again I am old fashion and not up to speed with the current in crowd.

My grandmother, God rest her soul, at 85 years of age told me she would look less favorably upon me if I ever lived with a woman. And I stayed my ground for her and my own personal beliefs.

Well as many priests tell you in their homily, they have the feeling that many of their preachings go upon deaf ears.

Feel sorry for those blinded by sin.

[Frankcdnj]

I emailed my friend the exorcist this question:

Father, is it wrong for me to pursue a non-virtuous woman as a spouse even though I am still a virgin? In knowing a woman has repented of her past life, is this enough to assure me she will be a devoted wife?

Reply:

Greetings and may God be with you. You are to be commended for your attempt and desire to do the right thing. However, I am confident that there are many women who remain virgins until they are married.

But more importantly, remember that sinners can be forgiven when they have sorrow for their sin. Anyone can commit a sin, but only the faithful can be forgiven (because the others do not have sorrow for their sin.

When a person has gone to confession and her or his sins have been forgiven, we do not need to recall any sin that was committed--because God does not.

Therefore the answer to your question is that you certainly marry someone who had fallen into sin before. For if God has forgiven the sin, should no we do so also?

Of course, there are other considerations too, such as the other person's lifestyle, danger of AIDS or other disease, and his or her basic belief system. For one of these reasons, one may conclude it is not in the best interest of either person to marry.

Morally speaking, however, if the person has been to confession and had the sins forgiven, we have no reason to remember the sin either.

But of course they’re other considerations that come into the picture. The likelihood of faithfulness throughout the marriage must be considered also.

I hope this helps.

[MrsFrozen]

I believe the reason all these statistics are true is that most of those who cohabit do not have God in their lives like they should. They may believe in God, but they have to walk the walk, too. Those who take their faith very seriously would most likely not cohabit because they know what a horrible sin it is, and would want to avoid something like that. Cohabitation cheapens love and marriage, and I believe that these are the same people who wouldn't take marriage seriously enough to stay faithful and monogomous. As for these couples being unhappy, I'd be pretty unhappy, too, if I didn't have God in my life!

I am not trying to offend anyone by saying these things. I know that there have been successful marriages of cohabiting couples. But that's the exception, it seems, and not the norm. If you're reading this and you're cohabiting with someone, please take a good look at these statistics and reconsider what you're doing. Please pray about it, and I'll be praying for you, too.

God bless. :)

Edited December 28, 2003 by MrsFrozen

[MrsFrozen]

If you are having sex with someone before marriage , chances are you are not paying attention to all the other things that are needed in a good relationship. You are probably also using contraception which is a basic denial of the marriage act, although sex is probably the reasoning you are living together in the first place. Contraception teaches men to treat women as objects of pleasure, rather than a partner given to them by God.

Hi, CMother.. This was a great post. I never thought of that before, contraception teaching men to use woman as objects of pleasure. Just another reason why contraception is so wrong. Thanks for posting!

[cmotherofpirl]

You can find a copy of the Theology of the Body by Christopher West or read anything the pope has written on the dignity of women at EWTN library at

http://ewtn.com/vlibrary/search.asp

Edited December 28, 2003 by cmotherofpirl

[Sojourner]

You can find a copy of the Theology of the Body by Christopher West or read anything the pope has written on the dignity of women at EWTN library at

http://ewtn.com/vlibrary/search.asp

"The Theology of the Body" is a great book, and the audio series by Christopher West is fantastic. I would highly recommend them to anyone looking into this issue.

[Frankcdnj]

Most definitely contraception is an evil that uses women as objects of lust and sexual gratification. Contraception is still considered morally wrong within the marriage union but at least the notion of pure physical enjoyment is absent which is present with fornication.

Yes, many people are under the influence or control of satan regarding there behavior while being single.

Obviously, they are missing the love of God in their life which is why they seek pleasure from another person outside of the marriage union.