if a priest is rude in confession

[Era Might]

So long as there is no danger of others learning the person's identity, it's fine. I have seen Priests on EWTN, for example, mention something they heard in a confession. They were very discrete, to make sure the person could not be known (and the people were anonymous, anyway, so nobody would have known). If your anecdote will tip off public knowledge, and might expose the individual, don't tell it.

Edited September 14, 2005 by Era Might

[theculturewarrior]

Well, if priests on EWTN can do it, I can too!

Can you tell your own sins after you confess them?

Can you share the advice your confessor gives you?

[Era Might]

Yes, you can tell your own sins. Your Priest, however, can't even talk to you about them, unless you explicitly tell him to. He can never mention them again, no matter what.

And yes, you can share the advice he gives you. If it's bad advice, however, it should not be disclosed unless you are sure his identity can be kept a secret.

[philothea]

The seal of the confessional only obligates the priest, not you. [i]You[/i] can talk about [i]your[/i] confessions all you want.

Obviously, charity and such still applies.

[cappie]

"The penitent is not obliged by the seal of Confession; not even with reference to what the confessor has told him. Anyone who discloses matters to the detriment of the confessor sins by violating a natural or committed secret, unless the private welfare or common good requires such manifestation." [b]Moral Theology by Herbert Jone OFM Cap & Urban Adelman OFM Cap[/b]

All of us should commit this canon to heart:

[b]canon 219: No one may unlawfully harm the good reputation which a person enjoys, or violate the right of every person to protect his or her privacy[/b]

[Norseman82]

Well, if a priest is unjustifiuably rude to penitents, shouldn't potential penitents have the right to be warned to prevent [i]them[/i] harm so that they can seek a better confessor?

[cappie]

[quote name='Norseman82' date='Sep 15 2005, 10:14 AM']Well, if a priest is unjustifiuably rude to penitents, shouldn't potential penitents have the right to be warned to prevent [i]them[/i] harm so that they can seek a better confessor?
[right][snapback]723711[/snapback][/right]
[/quote]

unjustafiably is the correct word. But it should not be done lightly that's my point

[Oik]

I sympathize with you TCW.

I struggle with a similar thing in other areas. Wouldn't it be better to offer it up for the sake of charity? Wouldn't it make for a joyful sacrifice to blessed those who curse (are rude) to you?

We aren't all saints, I know. I say I hear you on this. What i say is that we should unite our sufferings, our insults, our affronts with that of Christ. How many times have we offended God?

Hope this helps.
May God Bless you,
Chelsea

[the_rev]

[quote name='Era Might' date='Sep 14 2005, 06:25 PM']Yes, you can tell your own sins. Your Priest, however, can't even talk to you about them, unless you explicitly tell him to. He can never mention them again, no matter what.

And yes, you can share the advice he gives you. If it's bad advice, however, it should not be disclosed unless you are sure his identity can be kept a secret.
[right][snapback]723564[/snapback][/right]
[/quote]

My parish priest has numersouly talked about my sins outside fo the confessional with me, maybe just bringing one up in a conversation or when we get together, that's wrong?

[Era Might]

[quote name='the_rev' date='Sep 14 2005, 09:25 PM']My parish priest has numersouly talked about my sins outside fo the confessional with me, maybe just bringing one up in a conversation or when we get together, that's wrong?
[right][snapback]723775[/snapback][/right]
[/quote]

Yes. He can never mention what you confessed again, UNLESS you give him permission (eg, you say in a private meeting "do you remember when I confessed such-and-such").

Your Priest may be excommunicated for breaking the seal. I don't know. Cappie?

Edited September 15, 2005 by Era Might

[theculturewarrior]

Okay, here's the story, to put things in perspective. I'm planning on using this story as a means of explaining what it's like to be mentally ill.

I LOVE confession. One of my symptoms is excessive guilt, and confession helps with that. I get excessively guilty because I am hypersensitive, and I tend to think everybody is as hypersensitive as I am, so if I'm abrupt with someone, I feel like they're going to revile me because I was rude. (The Litany of Humility is also therapeutic).

One day, in a rich neighborhood somewheres in Texas, I went to confession, and I told the priest that I was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and that I was struggling with depression. The priest was visibly uncomfortable for the remainder of the confession.

That's what it's like.

[cappie]

It would seem very unwise of the priest to go down that particular road

In Canon Law we read:

Can. 983 §1 The sacramental seal is inviolable. Accordingly, it is absolutely wrong for a confessor in any way to betray the penitent, for any reason whatsoever, whether by word or in any other fashion.

§2 An interpreter, if there is one, is also obliged to observe this secret, as are all others who in any way whatever have come to a knowledge of sins from a confession.
.
[i]Everything [/i]disclosed to a priest in the sacrament of penance, [b]whether absolution is given or not[/b], comes under the seal of confession. The use of the latin word [b][i]nefas[/i][/b] (absolutely wrong) shows how seriously the norm of this canon is regarded. Put simply, the priest is strictly forbidden to reveal by any means whatever anything the penitent may have disclosed to him. Even the penitent cannot realese him from this obligation. However, having said that the confessor may not even speak to the penitent of his sins without the latter’s permission.

With the[i][b] permission [/b][/i]of the penitent one may speak of sacramental matters with the penitent. Presumed permission is insufficient.

Violation of the seal may be [i]direct[/i] or [i]indirect.[/i] It is [i]direct[/i] if the priest explicitly reveals the sin or the sinner: thus e.g. he might name the person and tell what was confessed, or he might mention the sin only but in such a way that his hearers can determine who the sinner is. It is [i]indirect[/i] if there is a lesser danger of the sin and the sinner being identified.

Can. 1388 §1 A confessor who [i]directly[/i] violates the sacramental seal, incurs a [i][b]latae sententiae [/b][/i]excommunication reserved to the Apostolic See; he who does so only [i]indirectly [/i]is to be punished according to the gravity of the offence.

[Norseman82]

My apologies for resurrecting an old thread, but I came across this when searching for the thread on the Filipino rapper and a recent homily by the associate pastor at my parish is relevant here.  He was speaking on the importance of availing oneself of the sacrament of confession as part Advent and gave a lot of tips.  He addressed the fact that people are sometimes hurt by priests in confession and said that if a priest scolds you in confession, to simply stop him and say you didn't come to be scolded, then walk out and find a different priest.