Your favorite jokes!

[curtins]

I love that one

rofl

[Christie_M]

I almost fell of my chair!!! rofl

[Christie_M]

[quote name='curtins' date='Jul 21 2005, 09:53 PM']I love that one

rofl
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I've never heard that one! I'll e-mail it to my friends!

[ofpheritup]

[quote name='infinitelord1' date='Jul 21 2005, 10:33 PM']what happens when you fall in the toilet?

your rearend gets wet.................hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaahahahhahhahahahhaaha.........i just made that up.
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Let us see now. Yeah I know too much time on your hands. Well maybe not exactly your hands. More like too much time on your......!

NEVER MIND. I hear another topic calling.

[immaculata]

true story.. I was driving down I-74 in Peoria with two of my friends from out of town. (Peoria's the headquarters of the Caterpillar tractor company.)

[b]Wade:[/b] Guys! I just thought of a great new drinking game! You drive around Peoria, and every time you see a piece of Caterpillar machinery you take a shot!
[b]Steve:[/b] Uhhh.... dude...
[b]Wade:[/b] What?
[b]me:[/b] That is so, like... illegal.

[cappie]

A nervous young priest, concluding his first sermon, told the flock,
"For my text next Sunday, I will take the words, “And they fed five
men with five thousand loaves of bread and two thousand fishes."

A member of the flock raised his hand and said, "That's not much of a trick. I could do that." The priest didn't respond. However, the next Sunday he
decided to repeat the text. This time he did it properly, "And they fed five thousand men with five loaves of bread and two fishes." Smiling, the priest said to the noisy man, "Could you do that, Mr. Perkins?"

The member of the flock said, "I sure could."
"How would you do it?" asked the minister.

"With all the food I had left over from last Sunday!"

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='Old_Joe' date='Jul 18 2005, 11:08 AM'] Monsignor Dawson says to him out loud, "I think there's something wrong with the microphone."  to which the entire congregation replies, "And also with you."
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[homeschoolmom]

Okay... here's the only joke I ever remember my mom telling me. (I think I was in Junior High when this doozy came along....)


Why was Jesus crucified instead of stoned to death?









So Catholics could go

instead of

[homeschoolmom]

[Christie_M]

What does ;lajksdofjalk;jsd mean?

[zunshynn]

A Jesuit and a Franciscan are talking and a man comes up to them and asks, "How many novenas must I say to get a Mercedes Benz?"


















The Franciscan asks, "What's a Mercedes Benz?"



















The Jesuit asks, "What's a novena?"

Edited July 27, 2005 by zunshynn

[Didacus]

The soldier told his captain one morning, "Captain, I can't find anymore, I broke my glasses."

The captain told him, "Don't worry, we'll just put you in the front line so you can see."
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Another one I like is:

"MY MOTHER LIED!!! Being over 15 years and I ain't blind yet!"

[Old_Joe]

Would anyone like to hear the greatest Knock Knock Joke ever?

[Christie_M]

sure! what is it?

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='Christie_M' date='Jul 27 2005, 04:44 PM']sure! what is it?
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Okay, go ahead... You start.