franciscanheart Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 okay so we have the you know youre from (whatever state) when/if .... how about when youre IN another state lol ya know you're [b]in[/b] Texas when... * Ya no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water. * You can say 110 degrees without fainting. * You notice your car overheating before you ever drive it. * You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off. * The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly. * You can make instant sun tea. * Your computer won't work unless it has it's own AC blowing on it. * You learn that a seat belt makes a beaver dam good brandin iron. * You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car. * Hot air balloons can't go up, because the air outside is hotter than the air inside. * You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window. * You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance. * Hot water now comes out of both taps. * It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets. * You actually burn your hand opening the car door... * You discover that it only takes two fingers to drive your car. * The swans in the Zoo come in "original recipe" and "extra crispy." * Hotter water comes from the cold water tap than the hot one. * The strawberries are ripe and the cab drivers are riper. * Your pool water starts to boil in the sun. * The hot-dogs sold outside Yankee Stadium are actually hot. * Pigs complain about sweating like fat humans. * A scalding hot shower still cools you down. * You've been getting hot flashes, and you're a man. * People walking down the sidewalk spontaneously burst into flames. * A $20 surcharge is added to your bill when you eat at air-conditioned restaurants. * The politicians take their hands out of your pockets to fan themselves. * You need a spatula to remove your clothing. * When the beer gut and big butt don't keep you from wearing shorts. * You wish you had gotten the cloth seats instead of leather. * You ask your boss for extra work so you can be in the FREE air conditioning as much as possible. * You are sweating in both directions -- up and down! * Lawyers kill themselves because they know it's cooler in Hell. * It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is moving on the streets. * Sunscreen is sold at the front of the checkout counter, a formula less than 30 SPF is a joke, and you wear it just to go shopping. * You are sitting inside reading these jokes. * Your brother's braces make blisters on his lips. * You break a sweat the instant you step outside...at 7:30 a.m. before work. * No one would EVEN dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car not havin air conditioning. * Yer biggest bike wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" * Airplanes can't land because the asphalt is too soft. * You realize that asphalt has a liquid state. * The city is rationing the water supply, and it aint even summer yet! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StColette Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 hey that sounds like Louisiana lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StColette Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Louisiana 1. You measure distance in minutes. [b] 2. You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.[/b] (yep) 3. Stores don't have bags; they have sacks. 4. Stores don't have shopping carts; they have buggies. 5. You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it, no matter what time of the year. [b]6. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I am fixing to go to the store.[/b] (Micah will laugh at this ) 7. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, or animal. 8. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked. 9. You carry jumper cables in your car ... for your OWN car. 10. You know what "cow tipping" and "snipe hunting" is. 11. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco. 12. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent. 13. You think sexy lingerie is a tee shirt and boxer shorts. 14. The local papers covers national and international news on one page but requires 6 pages for sports. 15. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday. 16. You know which leaves make good toilet paper. 17. You find 90 degrees F "a little warm." [b]18. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer,Summer, Still Summer, and Christmas.[/b] [b]19. You know whether another Louisianian is from southern, middle, or northern Louisiana as soon as they open their mouth.[/b] 20. There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 or more. [b] 21. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past-time known as "goin wal-martin" or off to "Wally World."[/b] ( my aunt says Wally World lol ) 22. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather. [b] 23. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop ... it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor.[/b] ( AMEN ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honour Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 [quote name='StColette' date='Jul 14 2005, 03:30 PM']Louisiana 1. You measure distance in minutes. [b] 4. Stores don't have shopping carts; they have buggies. [b]6. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I am fixing to go to the store.[/b] (Micah will laugh at this ) 10. You know what "cow tipping" and "snipe hunting" is. 15. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday. 20. There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 or more. [b] 21. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past-time known as "goin wal-martin" or off to "Wally World."[/b] ( my aunt says Wally World lol ) [b] 23. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop ... it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor.[/b] ( AMEN ) [right][snapback]643594[/snapback][/right] [/quote] My personal favs, that also apply to Texas! I'll have you know that my town pop 20,000 has TWO DQs and [b]still[/b] one of them is the HIGHEST GROSSING almost every year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 You know you're in Chicago when.. 1. There are two seasons: winter and construction 2. You measure travel distance in time, BUT it depends on the time of day, that is rush hour or not 3. Annual temps can go from -25 to 104 degrees, and sometimes it happens in the same month 4. Your governor pulls a fast one and funds embryonic stem cell research, (10 million $) and does this without TRULY having the backing of his constituents Sorry guys, I just cannot get past that last one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honour Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 (edited) California. When every other car on the road is a Civic or Jetta. When useing your "turn signals" is considered letting the enemy know your plan of attack. When you get passed doing 100 on the freeway. (This only happens when traveling against the traffic) You are sitting on the freeway and not moving. Any path you drive on regaurdless of size starts with "the" ( Interstate 405= the 405, Highway 14= the 14), (Ave E=the E) When in vehicles, everyone waves with one finger. When your 15 mile commute, takes 2 and a half hours. When you have a Govenator. I miss Edited July 14, 2005 by Honour Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ora et Labora Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I love your Texas jokes, Hughey! Lol! I live in TX, but its not that hot. hehe Almost though. Kristina Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StColette Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Texas drivers are really considerate I've noticed that lol And Louisiana folks wave to each other lol using all fingers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ora et Labora Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 [quote name='Honour' date='Jul 14 2005, 06:17 PM']California. When every other car on the road is a Civic or Jetta. When useing your "turn signals" is considered letting the enemy know your plan of attack. When you get passed doing 100 on the freeway. (This only happens when traveling against the traffic) You are sitting on the freeway and not moving. Any path you drive on regaurdless of size starts with "the" ( Interstate 405= the 405, Highway 14= the 14), (Ave E=the E) When in vehicles, everyone waves with one finger. When your 15 mile commute, takes 2 and a half hours. When you have a Govenator. I miss [right][snapback]643668[/snapback][/right] [/quote] I would to! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honour Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 [quote name='StColette' date='Jul 14 2005, 04:18 PM']Texas drivers are really considerate I've noticed that lol And Louisiana folks wave to each other lol using all fingers [right][snapback]643673[/snapback][/right] [/quote] Texans understand the concept of slower traffic keep right. Californians are like, lets do the same speed and ride side by side to block everone else. That and the "slow lane" is for 55 or less, or 110 or more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 I will finish Chicago: 5. Your hot dog has the equivalent of a side salad on top of it, including a 'sport pepper' 6. You root for 'da' Bulls and 'da' Bears 7. Your radio is always tuned into the traffic report 8. The only cows you've seen are plastic decorated ones during 'Cows on Parade' 9. A jet flies overhead every 1-2 minutes 10. Your porch is hazardous 11. Your second car is a 'Metra' 12. You have TWO Ikeas to choose from when shopping for cheap Scandanavian furniture 13. Your female relatives have visited you soley to take their daughters to the American Place Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philothea Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 Well, I am not a Texan, nor do I live there, but visiting made rather an impression, so... [i]You know you're in Texas when...[/i] The highway signs no longer say "Do not drive on the median" like they did in all the surrounding states. Instead, the median has barriers... with bits of broken truck scattered around them. Everything that possibly can be is shaped like Texas. People are happy to see you, just because they haven't seen anyone in a while. (Out in the country.) "Have you accepted Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior?" is a normal way of saying hi. (east Texas) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
franciscanheart Posted July 15, 2005 Author Share Posted July 15, 2005 [quote name='Honour' date='Jul 14 2005, 06:05 PM']My personal favs, that also apply to Texas! I'll have you know that my town pop 20,000 has TWO DQs and [b]still[/b] one of them is the HIGHEST GROSSING almost every year. [right][snapback]643649[/snapback][/right] [/quote] yep those all still apply to texas lol the fixin to thing - do that allllllll the time lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old_Joe Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 [quote name='StColette' date='Jul 14 2005, 06:18 PM']Texas drivers are really considerate I've noticed that lol And Louisiana folks wave to each other lol using all fingers [right][snapback]643673[/snapback][/right] [/quote] and it's true. My sister went to Texas A&M for grad school, and she noticed the same things. She sid that Texans would over to the side of the road and let you pass them. The first time she saw this she thought a lot of cars were having problems, until someone explained it to her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shelly_freak Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 Have to add to the Chicago one: 14) When you think the only way to say cheesburger is cheeeeesbugu cheesbugu cheesbugu. 15) You NEVER expect them to finish millenium park for good and expect it will still take millions and millions of dollars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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