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Old_Joe

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franciscanheart

[quote] Your burial plot is six feet over rather than six feet under. [/quote]
:( thats so sad

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well it's true lol especially in New Orleans, everyone is laid to rest above ground because it gets flooded there soo much. I believe there are some old old pictures of when it flooded really bad and caskets were floating around, that's when they started the above ground burials.

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sweetpea316

*This is for Texas...man...it makes us sound like such hicks!*


You see more Texan flags than American flags.

You know someone who ate the 72 oz steak and got it for free.

You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry, and your Cowboy Boots.

You can write a check at Dairy Queen for 2 Hungr-Busters and fries.

You prefer Whataburger to McDonalds.

You dress up to go shopping at the mall.

You've hung ornaments and tinsel on a tumbleweed and used it as a Christmas tree.

You're disappointed when a food doesn't come in spicy flavor.

You know from experience that rattlesnake meat tastes like chicken.

You can tell a rock from an armadillo at 300 yards.

You know what a 'Cowboy Cadillac' is.

You have both a dog and a brother-in-law named Bud

Your local grocery store sells cactus in the Fresh Produce department

You watch the movie Urban Cowboy and laugh at the phony Texan accents

You choose a brand of Mexican salsa with the same care that another might use to select a bottle of fine wine

You think that the 4 basic food groups are nachos, bar-b-que, fajitas, and Copenhagen.

You refer to the Dallas Cowboys as "God's favorite football team"

You know whether another Texan is from South, West, East, North, or Central Texas as soon as they open their mouth.

You don't consider people from Austin to be real Texans.

Your Pastor wears boots.

There is no such thing as a "secret" sin.

The Blue Book value on your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Texas.

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franciscanheart

texas twice! yes! its because we're THAT cool! even if we are hicks lol!

[quote] You're disappointed when a food doesn't come in spicy flavor. [/quote]
:lol: its funny cuz its true!!

[quote] You know whether another Texan is from South, West, East, North, or Central Texas as soon as they open their mouth. [/quote]
i love this about texas lol

[quote] You don't consider people from Austin to be real Texans.  [/quote]
haha im glad we all agree

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franciscanheart
:D thats okay. we're cool enough that everyone in texas could post it and it would still be cool :cool:
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[quote]Extra credit if you find it amusing based on the Freudian theory of why we build skyscrapers.
[/quote]

:rolling:

I still can't believe they closed Rock N' Roll Runza. If they were getting less business, they should've just called me.

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I live in Canada eh?

You Know You're From Canada When...
You're not offended by the term, "Homo Milk."

You understand the phrase, "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield."

You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.

You drink pop, not soda.

You know what a Mickey and 2-4 mean.

You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars.

You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.

You drive on a highway, not a freeway.

[b]You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.[/b]

You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.

[b]You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.[/b]

You brag to Americans that: Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion and many more are Canadians.

You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!

You know what a touque is.

You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed" not "Zee".

You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.

You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan."

[b]You perk up when you hear the theme song from "Hockey Night in Canada."[/b]

You were in grade 12, not the 12th grade.

"Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary and more polite than, "Huh?"

[b]Winter. Whenever you want it. And then some.[/b]

There's German food, Italian food, Chinese food, Armenian food, American food, but NO Canadian food.

You call a "mouse" a "moose".

[b]You like the Americans a little because they don't want Quebec either.[/b]

Contests run by anyone other than the government have "skill-testing questions" that winners must answer correctly before they can claim a prize.

Everything is labelled in English and French.

Milk comes in plastic bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.

Mountain Dew has no caffeine.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Canada.




And I can add a few of my own:

You get upset when an american team wins the Stanley Cup

You still tell stories of when the blue Jays won the world series.

Your school posts bear warnings for children

When making a deposit at the dump, bears are eating 40 feet away, and this doesn't bother you.

Rabbits are known as pests to be dealt with, and not necessarily cut and cudly

When you call for a steak, you call for a 'cow's ass' and this is not offensive to your wife

You never hesitate before going to the doctors or the hospital is you have a cold or a minor cut

beer is normal, even for women

When you go to university, the students in the classes are entirely formed of minorities, wihtout any distinct group surpassing 8% of the class population

Grandpa still laughs at you whenver women are voting

No one in town has any outisde pools, but 23% of the houses have outside ice rinks

You know broken hockey sticks are useful as firewood, poles, javelins, making tables and fixing your car.

You know frost bites has degrees just as burns do

Your winter closet is bigger than your summer closet if you have one at all

Farenheit was a scientist of some sort, and not a temperature gradation

You measure everything in meters, but state your height in feet

You know the difference between mass and weight

Your wife occasionally gets stuck in the snowbank when trying to leave the driveway

ect...ect...ect...

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Noel's angel

You Know You're Irish When...
The condensation on your pint of Guinness takes the shape of shamrocks

You don't believe there is a God, but you are beaver dam sure of the infallibility of the Pope.

You believe that to forgive is divine, but you don't excercise it yourself.

You won't eat meat on Friday, but you'll drink a pint for breakfast.

You consider any Irishman who has become successful a traitor.

You have great respect for the truth, and you only use it in emergencies.

The further you get from Ireland, the more Irish you get.

You eat homefried taters for brakfast, potato bread for lunch, and potato stew for dinner.

You cry at sad movies, but you cheer in battle.

You will never play professional basketball.

You swear very well.

You think you sing very well.

There isn't a huge difference between losing your temper and killing someone.

You're strangely poetic after a few beers.

Many of your sisters are Catherine, Elizabeth or Mary and one is Mary Catherine Elizabeth.

You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking so you can start talking.

Much of your food is boiled.

You are, or know someone, named "Murph." If you don't know Murph, then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph or Mac, then you know Sully, and you'll probably also know Sully McMurphy.

Your parents were on a first name basis with everyone at the local emergency room.

There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your last keg party.

You're proud to be Irish - and you pass these jokes on to all your Irish friends!


:huh:

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