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grammar/english nazis needed


Fides_et_Ratio

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Fides_et_Ratio

my letter to the CDW in Rome...

[quote]**** ******* ********** **
*******, Ohio *****-****
USA

July 6, 2005

His Eminence
Francis Cardinal Arinze
Prefect of the Congregation for Divine Worship
and Discipline of the Sacraments
Palazzo delle Congregazoni
00120 Vatican City

Your Eminence,

I am writing to you as a last resort in an effort to solve the liturgical situation at my parish, Saint *******'s in the Diocese of Columbus. The associate pastor, Father T***** B****** consistently ad-libs (changes the wording of) the prayers and propers all throughout the Liturgy—including and especially the Eucharistic Prayer, which is very rarely one of the four Eucharistic Prayers (it is usually one of the Children’s one (at non-specified Children’s Masses with little or no children present) or one of the Eucharistic Prayers for “Various Needs and Occasions”), changes the order of the Mass, has questionable homilies,  "snacks" on the Eucharist after the distribution of Communion (i.e., he does not offer those pieces of the host broken off during the Fraction rite, but instead saves them and consumes them (and any other hosts not perfectly round--giving him the benefit of the doubt) after distributing communion), does not reverence the altar at the beginning nor conclusion of the Mass, and has many other liturgical innovations.

I have spoken with Father B****** himself to no avail, written him a letter (a copy of which was sent to the pastor by myself), spoken with my pastor, exchanged several e-mails with my pastor over this situation, and written the bishop of my diocese. My response from the bishop arrived over four months ago, yet nothing has changed. I have included copies of all written exchanges for your convenience.

As I have asked both pastors and my bishop, should I be at fault in my understanding of any of these matters I pray and hope that you too will not hesitate to correct me as it is my greatest and most sincere hope to only better understand the Liturgy of the Church.

Thank you most sincerely,




Jillian ******[/quote]

Grazie.

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It looks good. Hopefully writing Cardinal Arinze will make a difference. Also, never stop praying! :fingercross:

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Thy Geekdom Come

As I have asked both pastors and my bishop, should I be at fault in my understanding of any of these matters[color=red][,][/color] I pray and hope that you too will not hesitate to correct me as it is my greatest and most sincere hope to only better understand the Liturgy of the Church.

I wouldn't bother with your split infinitive, simply because the corrected form is even harder to understand.

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Technicoid

[quote name='Fides_et_Ratio' date='Jul 6 2005, 11:03 PM']my letter to the CDW in Rome...
Grazie.
[/quote]

I think the message might be clearer if you broke some of the examples out into a list. When you use serial clauses as you have here, it helps to employ simple structures. Yours are a bit complex, so I suggest you create a list of examples instead—either that or simplifiy each clause.

Also, you want to be selective about using parenthetical information. If it's critical detail, it doesn't belong in parentheses. If it's truly parenthetical, you can probably delete it.

Finally, add detail where you have made general claims. How are his homilies questionable? What innovations has he introduced? You have to be very specific, even to the point of providing dates for some of these events. Otherwise, your claims will be considered heresay.

Here's an example:

=====

The associate pastor, Father T***** B******, engages in the following behaviors:

- He consistently changes the wording of the prayers and propers throughout the Liturgy—including and especially the Eucharistic Prayer. He very rarely uses one of the four Eucharistic Prayers but instead opts for one of the children’s prayers at regular Masses or one of the Eucharistic Prayers for Various Needs and Occasions.

- He changes the order of the Mass. <add details>

- He does not reverence the altar at the beginning nor conclusion of the Mass.

- His homilies often contain doctrinally questionable views. <add details>

- He treats the Eucharist from the host broken during the Fraction rite as if it were a personal snack rather than distributing during Communion.

- He introduces other liturgical innovations. <add details>

======

The form might seem a bit rigid. (I'm a technical writer by trade, so clarity wins out over more academic presentations when the point is to inform.)

Hope this helps.

Bill

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God's Errand Girl

[quote name='Technicoid' date='Jul 7 2005, 12:57 AM']I think the message might be clearer if you broke some of the examples out into a list.
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[/quote]


I am a Language Arts teacher and I agree with Technicoid's initial statement. You could use bullets to list each general statement and follow each statement with specific details.

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Birgitta Noel

I didn't think it mattered if the priest consumed the whole large host. In fact, I've often been at masses where he does just that. And then if there are hosts left over I've seen the priest consume them when they cannot be reserved in the tabernacle.

Perhaps he doesn't want to distribute the broken pieces due to the crumb issue?

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Fides_et_Ratio

[quote name='Birgitta Noel' date='Jul 7 2005, 09:47 PM']I didn't think it mattered if the priest consumed the whole large host.  In fact, I've often been at masses where he does just that.  And then if there are hosts left over I've seen the priest consume them when they cannot be reserved in the tabernacle. 

Perhaps he doesn't want to distribute the broken pieces due to the crumb issue?
[right][snapback]635071[/snapback][/right]
[/quote]
I know & understand that... except these are Sunday Masses with another full Mass coming in after the one I attended and the ciborium to go back to the tabernacle is no where near full. He just eats them like he hasn't had breakfast yet... it's really weird. and he purposely reserves the hosts broken during the Fraction rite and consumes them later (and he's definitely not worried about crumbs... if only!). He has no regard for the Mass, when I brought up his making up Eucharistic Prayers he said, "the Mass isn't set in concrete stone" and told me that I should be thankful he was using bread and wine and not cookies and coke. :blink:

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cookies and coke- thats funny I dont see why you should be so thankful hes using bread and wine- its not like hes going out of his way to do so- its part of the mass- and if he didnt use bread and wine it wouldnt be mass.

oh and you dont have to be german to be a nazi

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God's Errand Girl

[quote name='Fides_et_Ratio' date='Jul 7 2005, 10:26 PM']He just eats them like he hasn't had breakfast yet... it's really weird. and he purposely reserves the hosts broken during the Fraction rite and consumes them later (and he's definitely not worried about crumbs... if only!).
[right][snapback]635130[/snapback][/right]
[/quote]

Maybe he just wants to get as much of Jesus in him as possible...:idea:
...or maybe he's just lived alone for too long.

Edited by God's Errand Girl
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Technicoid

[quote name='God's Errand Girl' date='Jul 7 2005, 11:29 PM']Maybe he just wants to get as much of Jesus in him as possible...:idea:
...or maybe he's just lived alone for too long.
[/quote]

Bless you, dear. That's very kind of you to look at it this way. Frankly, his behavior does sound a bit suspect. Maybe he is trying to fill a hole?

Edited by Technicoid
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Technicoid

[quote name='Fides_et_Ratio' date='Jul 7 2005, 09:26 PM']when I brought up his making up Eucharistic Prayers he said, "the Mass isn't set in concrete stone" and told me that I should be thankful he was using bread and wine and not cookies and coke. :blink:
[/quote]

So why not whiteface and long, floppy shoes? That kind of justification is what leads to clown masses. :shootme:

Actually, a little perusing through canon law and the GIRM should give you some support. However, maybe God's Errand Girl has a point. It almost sounds like hoarding behavior. Maybe he's not well.

Edited by Technicoid
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