Old_Joe Posted August 23, 2005 Share Posted August 23, 2005 Bart, Lisa, and Homer are grocery shopping. Bart: (puts several bags of candy in the cart) I need candy. Homer: (looks unsure) Bart: It's for candy class. Homer: Well...okay, but get five bags in case we eat four on the way home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stargirl3:16 Posted November 22, 2005 Share Posted November 22, 2005 After the all-syrup Squishy... [b]Bart: [/b]OK, we're young, rich, and full of sugar. What do we do? [b]Milhouse:[/b] [yelling] Let's go crazy, Broadway style! [singing] [b]Both:[/b] Springfield, Springfield, it's a hell of a town: the schoolyard's up and the shopping mall's down. The stray dogs go to the animal pound, [b] Bart:[/b] Springfield, Springfield! [b]Milhouse:[/b] Springfield, Springfield! [b]Sailor:[/b] New York, New York! [b]Bart:[/b] Hey,New York is that-a-way, man! [b] Sailor:[/b] Thanks, kid! [leaves] [b]Both:[/b] [singing] It's a hell of a...toooown! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onathing1 Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Homer to Bart ,"Butter your bacon. Bacon your sausage" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old_Joe Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 From the episode where Bart sees his future: Homer: Would you like some Soylent Green? Ralph: Isn't that made of people? Homer: (rolls eyes) Here we go... Also from same episode Homer: What a bleak horrible future we live in! Bart: Don't you mean present? Homer: Oh yeah...right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zabbazooey Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 That was on tonight : Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stargirl3:16 Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Ralph: "Hi Lisa! Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theologian in Training Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 In honor of his day [b]Brockman:[/b] Kent Brockman at the Action News desk. A massive tanker has run aground on the central coastline, spilling millions of gallons of oil on Baby Seal Beach. [b]Lisa:[/b] [i][gasps][/i] Oh, no! [b]Homer:[/b] It'll be okay, honey. There's lots more oil where that came from. [b]Marge:[/b] Now the cat needs his medication... [b]Homer:[/b] [i][assenting, simultaneously][/i] No problem... [b]Marge:[/b] ... every morning and the furnace has been putting off... [b]Homer:[/b] Can do. Right. Uh-huh. [b]Marge:[/b] ... a lot of carbon monoxide, so keep the window open. [b]Homer:[/b] Gotcha. Cat in the furnace. [b]Marge:[/b] Ah, you know, I think we'll take Maggie with us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theologian in Training Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 [b]Evacuator:[/b] Sir, for your own safety, we do advise you to evacuate. [b]Grandpa:[/b] I ain't leaving! I was born in this nursing home, and I'll die in this nursing home. [b]Evacuator:[/b] Is there any chance of you changing your mind? [b]Grandpa:[/b] Sure, let's go. [b]Marge:[/b] Dear God, this is Marge Simpson. If you stop this hurricane and save our family, we will be forever grateful -- and recommend you to all our friends! So, if you could find it in your infinite wisdom to... [b]Lisa:[/b] Wait! Listen, everybody. [i][sunlight shines and birds chip][/i] [b]Lisa:[/b] The hurricane's over. [b]Homer:[/b] He fell for it! Way to go, Marge! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jgirl Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 (edited) My all time favorite is: "They taste like...burning!" Also great are: "I beat the smart kids! I beat the smart kids! I *trips* I bent my wookie!" "My cat's breath smells like cat food" and "Me fail English? That's unpossible!" I'm a big Ralph Wiggum fan, if you couldn't tell. Edited February 15, 2006 by jgirl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrvoll Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 Mine is when Homer says "once you go vatican, you cant go back again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stargirl3:16 Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 (The kids are in a focus group for The Itchy and Scratchy Show.) Man: You each have a knob in front of you. When you like what you see, turn the knob to the right. When you don't like what you see, turn it left. Ralph: (has his knob in his mouth) My knob tastes funny. Man: Please refrain from tasting the knob. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stargirl3:16 Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 Lisa: What do you say to a boy to let him know you're not interested? Marge: Well, honey, when I... Homer: (puts up a hand) Let me handle this, Marge, I've heard 'em all. ``I like you as a friend.'' ``I think we should see other people.'' ``I don't speak English.'' Lisa: I get the idea. Homer: (not getting the hint) ``I'm married to the sea.'' ``I don't wanna kill you, but I will.'' ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Didacus Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 Homer: "Ahhhhh, I'm gonna lose my job because I'm dangerously unqualified!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stargirl3:16 Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 (Homer is mad after Moe steals a drink recipe he invented.) Homer: (grumbles) Stupid Moe, non-inventing, recipe-stealing, pug-nosed... Marge: Well, Homer, maybe you can get some consolation in the fact that something you created is making so many people happy. Homer: (sickly sweet) Oh, look at me! I'm making people happy! I'm the Magical Man from Happy-Land, in a gumdrop house on Lollipop Lane! (leaves the room, slamming the door. Pokes his head back in) Oh, by the way, I was being sarcastic.(closes the door) Marge: Well, DUH! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old_Joe Posted February 15, 2006 Share Posted February 15, 2006 Homer: "Every time I learn something new it pushes something old out of my head. Like that time when I took that home wine-making course and I forgot how to drive." Marge: "You didn't forget how to drive, you were drunk." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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