Favorite Simpsons Quotes

[Pio Nono]

JMJ
4/27 - Fifth Wednesday of Easter

Thought, since it's Easter, a resurrection (of sorts) was due.

"Lisa, the point of [i]Moby Johnsonville brat[/i] is [u]be[/u] [u]yourself[/u]." -Homer

[Theologian in Training]

I cannot believe how far away this thread has travelled. Well, I wanted to let you guys know that this Tuesday is the release of the Sixth Season of the Simpsons. Some really great ones, two of my personal favs: Bart's Comet and Homie the Clown.

Bart's Comet:

[b]Lisa:[/b] It blew up the bridge! We're doomed.
[b]Homer:[/b] It's times like this I wish I were a religious man.
[b]Lovejoy:[/b] [i][running down the street][/i] It's all over, people! We don't have
a prayer, argh...

Homie the Clown:

[b]Bart:[/b] Wow, I'm sorry I doubted you before, Dad.
[b]Lisa:[/b] If there had to be a bastardized version of Krusty, I'm glad it's
you.
[b]Homer:[/b] Thanks, honey. Bank shot!
[i][bounces seltzer off Bart's cheek and onto Lisa][/i]
[b]Lisa:[/b] Wow! That's good aim, Dad.
[b]Homer:[/b] Well, it _was_ my major.

[homeschoolmom]

I missed this thread. Thanks for the

My new favorite quote V

[Old_Joe]

(Homer and Moe are making a plan to steal Moe's car)
Moe: okay this toy car will represent my car and this olive will represent you-
Homer: (eats olive) MMMMMmmmm....Me
Moe: okay now the toy car will repesent you and this action figure will represnt the car. (realizes his mistake, brushes toycar and action figure off of counter) Just steal the car wouldja?

[White Knight]

[color=blue][b]"Donuts is there anything they can't do." - Homer Simspon,[/b][/color] [color=green][b]Captian of the Monorail Episode.[/b][/color]


[b]*Mr. Burns and Mr. Smithers shed some tears*

"Smithers, do you think it was my power plant that killed those ducks?" - Mr. Burns

"Huh, theres no maybe about it Sir." Mr. Smithers

*Mr. Burns sniffs and wipes his eyes* "Excellent!" - Mr. Burns

Kids News Episode.[/b]

[phatcatholic]

the Family Guy is better

[Theologian in Training]

The newer family guy is just not on par with their old stuff. They seem to be trying too hard to be edgy, instead of just being the show they used to be.

Homer the Great also from season 6

[b]Homer:[/b] I'd give anything to get into the Stonecutters.
[b]Lisa:[/b] What do they do there, Dad?
[b]Abe:[/b] I'm a member --
[b]Homer:[/b] What do they do? What _don't_ they do? [laughs] Oh, they do so
many things they never stop. Oh, the things they do there, my
stars.
[b]Lisa:[/b] You don't know _what_ they do there, do you?
[b]Homer:[/b] Not as such, no.
[b]Abe:[/b] I'm a Stonecutter --
[b]Bart:[/b] Dad, remember those self-hypnosis courses we took to help us
ignore Grampa?
[b]Homer:[/b] Do I ever! It's five years later and I _still_ think I'm a
chicken. I'm a chicken, Marge!
[b]Marge:[/b] I know, I know.
[b]Bart:[/b] Maybe we should be listening to him now.

[b]Abe:[/b] I'm a member!
[b]Homer:[/b] Huh?
[b]Abe:[/b] What?
[b]Homer:[/b] What?
[b]Abe:[/b] Huh?
[b]Lisa:[/b] You're a member of the Stonecutters, Grampa?
[b]Abe:[/b] Oh, sure. Let's see...[i][pulls out wallet, starts going through
it][/i] I'm an elk, a Mason, a communist. I'm the president of the
Gay and Lesbian Alliance for some reason...ah, here it is. The
Stonecutters.
[b]Homer:[/b] This is it! My ticket in: they have to let me in if I'm the son
of a member. I'll take this communist one too. [i][walks out][/i]

[Didacus]

"I'm a chicken!"!!!

That's one of the greatest Homer moments of all time!

ROFL!!!!

And I love the 'family guy too!"

[zabbazooey]

Krusty: OK, we'll start off with the baggy -- wha? [sees Homer] Those
are supposed to be baggy pants. Baggy!
Homer: Ooh. I've never had a pair of pants that fit this well in my
life.

[Christie_M]

Homer: "d'oh!"


lol

[White Knight]

[quote name='phatcatholic' date='Aug 11 2005, 06:00 AM']the Family Guy is better


[right][snapback]681635[/snapback][/right]
[/quote]


Not the middle aged ones. seasons 6th-10.

[prose]

I love the one where Homer is building the BBQ and marge is in the kitchen talking. Over her shoulder you see Homer running at the BBQ pit with an umbrella and it opens when he hits the pit!!



Tooooooo funny!

[prose]

Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.

*****

Homer (drunk): Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us: Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him!

******

Art lady: It's called 'outsider art.' It could be done by a mental patient, a hillbilly . . . or a chimpanzee.
Homer: Hey! In high school, I was voted most likely to BE a mental patient, a hillbilly, or a chimpanzee!

**********

Bart: May I be excused, mom?
Homer: Oh, so now you're quitting dinner, too.
Marge: Homer, please.
Homer: I didn't raise him to be a quitter. It must have been you. You quit every job you've ever had. Cop, pretzel vender, church counselor, professional gambler.
Marge: He's doing what he thinks is best.
Homer: Well, if quitting is the best, maybe I should just quit my job!
[Homer walks over to the phone and dials Mr. Burns' number.]
Mr Burns: Ahoy hoy?
Homer: Mr Burns? This is Homer J Simpson, the father of the big quitter! Well, I just wanted to tell you I'm a big quitter, too! And I quit!
[Homer winks twice.]
Marge: Homer, Mr Burns can't see you winking.
Homer: So--
[screams, hangs up phone.]

*****************

Homer: Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Lisa, honey, are you saying you are never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad! Those all come from the same animal!
Homer: Heh, heh, heh. (sarcastically) Oh, suuure Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

[Old_Joe]

Homer: Yeah that team sure did smell of elderberries, Moe. I mean they just plain sucked. They were the suckiest bunch of smells of elderberries that ever sucked.

[InCircles' brother]

homer: my back yard is so big it makes my front yard look like an idiot.