Family

[LiL Kat Said]

My family, lets say, isn't the most supportive anymore. And i never really realized how great it was that my mom used to take us to church when we were little (i think my aunts would've yelled at her if she didn't ) but for about 3+ years my brother and mother have totally left behind religion. (My dad is methodist and i don't think i've ever seen him go to any church)

Just in this past year I've started going to church again and I got confirmed ! I think i've grown so much and I'm so thankful to all the people at my church that i have in my life right now, they help me in so many ways.

But it is always hard for me to not be at Church with my family; Every now and then my mom will go to Church with me and she did come to my confirmation. I just always think how great it would be if they felt how i felt about Jesus Christ and Catholicism. How wonderful it would be to have my brother worshiping right along side me.

Does anyone have any ideas of how i can get them to come back to the Church? Or maybe just how i might be able to make Catholicism more appealing to my brother. (he's the "cool","macho", "jock" type of guy.)

thanks!
~Kathleen

[daugher-of-Mary]

[quote]Or maybe just how i might be able to make Catholicism more appealing to my brother. (he's the "cool","macho", "jock" type of guy.)[/quote]

Take him to an ordination. No kidding. Seeing the ordination of a seminarian my brother and I have known for quite awhile made SUCH an impression on my brother...

[drewmeister2]

Good idea! Also, remember always PRAYER!

[Mickey's_Girl]

Prayer, for sure. Also, I think that letting your family see your faith in action. I don't mean necessarily getting "in their face" about it...but I think a godly life, lived openly, can be an incredible witness.

That's how my grandma became Catholic. She grew up with no religion, but started dating my Grandpa in high school. His mother and sister (both faithful Catholics) made such an impression on Grandma that she decided she had to have what they had...and she's been living for Jesus as a Catholic ever since.

MG

[Fiat_Voluntas_Tua]

Be a light... Don't puff it up, keep the Faith real...let him know what it is really about.

Totus tuus,
Andrew Joseph

PS- Prayer is always good. Or if you have a friend who is a big 'jock, manly-man' who is a hardcore Catholic, introduce him to your brother.

[WillT]

Tell him Brett Favre is Catholic. That should get him!

[quote] Be a light... Don't puff it up, keep the Faith real...let him know what it is really about.[/quote]

But seriously, I agree with this. Example is simply the best way!

[rachael]

[quote name='LiL Kat Said' date='Nov 23 2004, 09:50 PM']

Does anyone have any ideas of how i can get them to come back to the Church? Or maybe just how i might be able to make Catholicism more appealing to my brother. (he's the "cool","macho", "jock" type of guy.)
[/quote]
i can't get my dad to go, period. but somehow i got my mom to go by beggin her over and over and over again. then she started going every sunday with me after i got confirmed earlier this year.

[mom25angels]

If it's any consolation the only time of year my Dad comes to mass is when we're having a baby baptised....which is about every two years.


I just realized next time someone asks me if we're having anymore I;ll tell them i'm morally bound to because it's the only way to get my Dad to mass.

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='mom25angels' date='Jan 10 2005, 12:21 AM'] I just realized next time someone asks me if we're having anymore I;ll tell them i'm morally bound to because it's the only way to get my Dad to mass. [/quote]

[cathqat]

Being an example, as everyone said, is vital.

Sometimes it's hard, when you love something, not to get in people's faces about it. One thing that may help is something I once heard called "the pocketwatch principle."

Imagine that you keep a pocketwatch with you all the time. It isn't obtrusive or obvious to everyone all the time --only the observant would really notice it-- but you order your own day around it. When you have questions about what time it is, you take it out and look at it. When people ask you what time it is, you check it. If you always do this when you want to know the time, people eventually notice. They'll want to know how you know what time it is; they may ask you questions about the pocketwatch when they see you refer to it. That's the time to talk about it.

The illustration may have its weaknesses, but it's similar to St. Francis' phrase "preach the Gospel at all times, use words if necesary."

I've found that one of the best ways to help someone discover the Faith is simply to get them curious about it. The pocketwatch principle can work, but if you know the person well and want to be more proactive, you can sometimes get pretty far by asking [i]them[/i] serious questions.

Here's an example. Back in high school, I had a very close friend who was an atheist. For years I tried to talk to him about religious matters, but he wouldn't hear any of it. Finally, I discovered a tactic that did work. After college, he was telling me all about his new job, and said, "Doesn't that sound good?" I could have said, "Yeah, that's awesome" or "Cool." That's what he expected. Instead, I asked, "What [i]is[/i] good?"

Boy, that shook him. From "what is good?" we moved to "what is happiness?" and "what is love?" I spent three years hounding him with questions like this and almost never providing him any answers myself. In a sense, I spent three years helping him to [i]unlearn[/i] all the things he [i]thought[/i] he knew --including all his little prejudices against Christianity. Seven years after "what [i]is[/i] good?" my atheist friend converted to Catholcism.

I was definitely NOT the only factor in his journey. (One of his [i]ex[/i]-Catholic friends, ironically, played a large role himself!) But my questions were a big factor in piquing his [i]curiosity[/i].

There is no single method or technique that works on all people. His brother, for example, never would have put up with the three torturous years of maddening questions. That's why it's so important to know the person very well.

But you might be amazed what you can accomplish.

[Cathurian]

That was wonderful cathqat.

"What is good?" Brilliant. I still haven't really got down how to evangelize, so that was really, really helpful Thank you!

[cathqat]

[quote name='Cathurian' date='Jan 15 2005, 10:53 PM'] I still haven't really got down how to evangelize, so that was really, really helpful Thank you! [/quote]
I'm glad someone enjoyed it

But remember, different people have different needs. The "what is good?" thing worked well with my friend, but (like I said) would never have worked with his brother! I think sparking a person's curiosity is great, and helping them to "unlearn" can be a crucial stage, but the necessary methods can vary greatly from person to person.

Speakers and teachers always say "know your audience." I think THE most important thing in evangelization is knowing the person well and loving them deeply. Empathy and compassion allow you to really listen to their concerns and fears and to really enter into those concerns and fears with them. This is the way of Christ.

Jesus himself is the best model for this. God the Son really became human for us. He entered deeply into our human experience. He really knew what it was like to be hungry, to be tired, to mourn loss, to be vulnerable to rejection, betrayal, and pain. He knew people's hearts, all their weaknesses and fears, and responded with pure, compassionate love. When he gave himself over to torture, suffering, and death for our sakes, he willingly entered into the very deepest depths of human experience, because suffering and death are the consequences of our sin. He didn't have to suffer and die, being holy and never having sinned himself, but that's how much he wanted to unite himself to each of us, to stand in solidarity with us in the worst of our trials and woes. And Jesus did not merely do this "for humanity," but for each and every human person.

One of my favorite passages by Pope John Paul II is the section of [i]Redemptor Hominis[/i] where he says:

"[B]y his incarnation, he, the Son of God... united himself with each man.... The Church wishes to serve this single end: that each person may be able to find Christ, in order that Christ may walk with each person the path of life, with the power of the truth about man and the world that is contained in the mystery of the incarnation and redemption and with the power of the love that is radiated by that truth.... Jesus Christ is the chief way for the Church. He himself is our way 'to the Father's house' and is the way to each man.... We are not dealing with the 'abstract' man, but the real, 'concrete,' 'historical' man. We are dealing with 'each' man, for each one is included in the mystery of redeption and with each one Christ has united himself forever through this mystery.... Man in the full truth of his existence, of his personal being and also of his community and social being--in the sphere of his own family, in the sphere of society and very diverse contexts, in the sphere of his own nation or people (perhaps still only that of his clan or tribe), and in the sphere of the whole of mankind--this man is the primary route that the Church must travel in fulfilling her mission: he is the primary and fundamental way for the Church, the way traced out by Christ himself, the way that leads invariably through the mystery of the incarnation and the redemption.... This man is the way for the Church--a way that, in a sense, is the basis of all the other ways that the Church must walk--because man--every man without any exception whatever--has been redeemed by Christ and because with man--with each man without any exception whatever--Christ is in a way united, even when he is unaware of it...."

To fulfill our mission in Christ, we must go the way of Christ, go to each and every human person...

[LiL Kat Said]

thanks so much for replying and giving me all this great advice yall It's encouraged me and it helps me remember that if i keep on trying it will happen. I love my brother so much and i just want to share this faith with him. I have noticed that before every meal he does the sign of the cross which probably means he's thanking God for his food . it still shocks me everytime i see it but it gives me such joy.

but i also just found a fake i.d. in his wallet and a friend of his who is on my soccer team said that he's drinking . So now i get all worried whenever he goes out, I don't know if i should tell my parents or even if i COULD tell them. It scares me everytime i think about it. I know i should tell them or atleast tell them to watch him closer but if he knew that i told or even if i knew about his fake id. then life would be misserable in my house.


So....He's confusing me but i'm gonna keep praying and take yall's advice to work!


thanks soooo much!
~Kathleen

[musturde]

I'm soo sorry to hear it Kath. I'll pray for u.

[Guest]

[quote name='cathqat' date='Jan 10 2005, 01:39 AM']

Here's an example. Back in high school, I had a very close friend who was an atheist. For years I tried to talk to him about religious matters, but he wouldn't hear any of it. Finally, I discovered a tactic that did work. After college, he was telling me all about his new job, and said, "Doesn't that sound good?" I could have said, "Yeah, that's awesome" or "Cool." That's what he expected. Instead, I asked, "What [i]is[/i] good?"

Boy, that shook him. From "what is good?" we moved to "what is happiness?" and "what is love?" I spent three years hounding him with questions like this and almost never providing him any answers myself. In a sense, I spent three years helping him to [i]unlearn[/i] all the things he [i]thought[/i] he knew --including all his little prejudices against Christianity. Seven years after "what [i]is[/i] good?" my atheist friend converted to Catholcism.

I was definitely NOT the only factor in his journey. (One of his [i]ex[/i]-Catholic friends, ironically, played a large role himself!) But my questions were a big factor in piquing his [i]curiosity[/i].

There is no single method or technique that works on all people. His brother, for example, never would have put up with the three torturous years of maddening questions. That's why it's so important to know the person very well.

But you might be amazed what you can accomplish. [/quote]
that was good