littleflower+JMJ Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 all these jokes going around......did somebody spike thepunch or what? lol. this is hilarious! man, i love this place NOTE: no one, and boy do i mean no one, quit their day job! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodsGrace Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 I got a few for ya!!! WHat did the fish say when it hit the brick wall.....dam!lol sorry had to say it...we were saying these jokes on the retreat I was on this weekend. ok....here's a poem.....Roses are red, and Violets are blue, I'm a pschitzofrenic, and so am I!!! (did I spell that right?? I don't think so!!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HiddenVoice Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 oooooooooooook.... That was......... special. Anyways, here's another one from the depths of the Voice's mind (that sounds like it makes noo sense): Moses, Jesus, and a friend decide to decend for a day to see what the big deal is about the game of golf. After a few holes, all three catch on very quickly and have a very competitive game. Finally they decide that the winner would be the first one that got there shot in the hole. Moses, up first, nailed his first shot but ended up having it head straight for a water hazard. before it could splash he parted the water, having it bounce on the wet rocks. He walked into the dry spot, and hit his ball just short of the hole. Jesus, gave his ball a good hard hit, but could not evade the same water hazard. The ball, however, miraculously landed on a lily pad. Jesus simply stepped on the water, walked over to it. And hit it, sending his ball closer to the hole then Moses. Suddenly, their bearded friend stepped up and hit the ball like the other two, straight into the water hazard. However, a little frog ate the ball and hopped onto a lily pad. Then it was picked up by a magnificent eagle and carried over to the green where it promptly spit the ball into the hole. The guy simply smiled. Moses, subtly leaned over and whispered in Jesus' ear. "I told you not to invite your Dad." Next please Voice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 pschitzofrenic (did I spell that right?? I don't think so!!) schizophrenia--schizophrenic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TempleofVesarius Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 i got a wicked funny joke well not really i just need two more posts to break 100 and i cant think of anything to say right now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TempleofVesarius Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 An engineer died and ended up in Hell. Soon, he became dissatisfied with the level of comfort in Hell, and began designing and building improvements. After a while, they had flush toilets, air conditioning, escalators. The engineer was a pretty popular guy. One day God called to Satan and said with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in Hell?" Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God exclaimed, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake--he should never have gotten down there in the first place. Send him back up here." "No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him." God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I'll sue!" Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueRose Posted July 15, 2003 Share Posted July 15, 2003 What's the last thing that goes through a bug's head when it hits the windshield of your car?? Its butt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodsThespianChic Posted July 15, 2003 Share Posted July 15, 2003 Haha, BlueRose, I told my aunt that joke over SnS dinner tonight. It was very funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodsGrace Posted July 15, 2003 Share Posted July 15, 2003 lol I was going to put that BlueRose, but I didn't want to steal anything else of yours! hehe anyways I've got some others but I don't think I can post them here....they're not bad, they're about the bible & a revised version of how man came to be but it uses a word that I don't know if I can post here...if you really want to hear it..email me & I'll send it to ya! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HiddenVoice Posted July 15, 2003 Share Posted July 15, 2003 OK. I'm trying to think of one that does not involve lawyers. I feel guilty for constantly slamming them........................ ............. ............. OK one more. Why are lawyer's buried 12 feet underground instead of the standard 6?????? Because deep down they're really nice people. ::Drum kick:: Thank you thank you. I'll be here all night. Voice P.S. I think we should vote on some finalists. I want an excuse to take out my best material. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted July 15, 2003 Share Posted July 15, 2003 LOL I like hiddenvoice's joke!! yes, i think he should be the winner....since i selfproclaim myself as the judge! hehee its early in the morning and i'm sleepy and he made me laugh and smile, ANYjoke that can do that is, well, very special! lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodsGrace Posted July 15, 2003 Share Posted July 15, 2003 Voice, that was your best material!!...jk! love ya!..anyways....I've got some that I need to find. I've got a lot of oldies that some ppl may not know. Anwyas, I'll start looking for them.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HiddenVoice Posted July 16, 2003 Share Posted July 16, 2003 You doubt my power grace? Come on. dish it out and I'll continue to deliver. I spent a year with nothing better to do in high school then read the joke pages out of reader's digest. I dare you. voice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodsThespianChic Posted July 16, 2003 Share Posted July 16, 2003 Oh really. Come on, bring out the best material. I dare you. I don't know if you are worthy of the title!!! Bring it on! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodsGrace Posted July 16, 2003 Share Posted July 16, 2003 who are you daring there missy??? you better be on my side of this GTC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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