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Dating often ruins...


J.R.D

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We have all heard the advice many imes, "If you really like a person as a freind, dont start dating them or you will probably end up not even being friends." This is very true. After breaking up [b]many times[/b] couples no longer want to talk to each other, see each other and they might even avoid each other. what a waste of a good friendship.


What are yall's views on this?


not the church views [b]your[/b] views

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Noel's angel

It depends on what the break up is like, i think. Im still friendly with my ex, not as friendly but thats just because he has changed and wants to go out socialising with people our age who like getting drunk and stuff. I do agree that it does affect friendsgips, they are never as strong, if there at all, after a relationship. That is why im giving up relationships for a while

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Thy Geekdom Come

I disagree wholeheartedly.

If you're married, and your best friend isn't your spouse, then you have a problem. ;)

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Thy Geekdom Come

[quote name='J.R.D' date='Oct 5 2004, 03:35 PM'] Im not talkin about marriage im talkin about teen dateing [/quote]
Yes, but I mean that your friends are the best people to date because your wife will be your best friend.

I think that where dating causes breakups, they couple can return to friendship, unless there is something awkward about being friends.

So what makes being friends awkward?

I would guess that it isn't just dating, but unchastity in dating.

For instance, if I get a girlfriend, we can break up and still be friends, but I think that if we did some stupid things while we were dating, it will be a lot harder to be friends because all we will ever think about is the lust we had, instead of having Christian love for one another.

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Noel's angel

again, it depends on the situation. My ex kinda wanted to move on to un chaste things, thats another reason why we broke up, but with regards to teen dating, i think its good to know the person quite well, but if theyre a really close friend, u run the risk of losing them all together because even though ure good friends it doesnt mean ur suitable partners for eachother

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Intresting


It's not really awkard being friends .... i personally think u should be .. but now in days its something u shouldnt do- be friends afterwards- society makes it wear dating is for sex so that after wards u dont be freinds just "parteners" ..... wheres the bond in that?

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Noel's angel

i think its good to be friends afterwards, just because u dont make a compatible couple, doesnt mean u cant be friends, but my relationship days are over with for a long time

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Ash Wednesday

I think everyone here has a point.

You do want to marry your best friend.

But dating can ruin what may have been a good friendship.

It depends on the nature of the dating that goes on. Superficial dating ruins potential friendships.

I think clean dating, or "courtship" is less risky with destroying a friendship when things don't work out. If you did a lot of stupid things, then, yes it is very difficult to go back to "just being friends."

Oftentimes a couple breaks up and they are officially "still friends" and don't speak to each other. Possibly over a number of years you may cross paths and it isn't as awkward. Most of the time when we break up with someone, we say "we can still be friends" because that translates to "I'm breaking up with you, but I don't want us to hate each other."

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Noel's angel

yes, i agree with u. many young people these days abuse dating and use it to gain sexual pleasure (cringe), when really, thats not what its all about. someday ill find a man that feels the same way, in NI

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Point 1: I don't think you should be dating anyone if you're not thinking about marriage. Otherwise, what's the point? Casual dating too often means "making out" which just isn't necessary and can easily cross the line into sin.

Point 2: I've only ever dated people with whom I've been friends first. It hasn't led to marriage, and it has resulted in either severe strain on relationships, or broken relationships. But, I know people who have dated and married their best friends and it's been good. It's a risk, and a big one, but the payoff could be great.

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I almost dated my best friend. We only discussed our feelings for each other and debated on whether to act on them, and it put a severe damper on us remaining best friends. It might just be the whole When Harry Met Sally mentality that "attraction always gets in the way" in an opposite gender friendship, but I always wonder if we had never brought it up would we still be best friends? After that discussion, our relationship became awkward. I can't imagine how two people could be friends, break up, and remain friends when all I had to do was mention a relationship and our friendship went "THUNK".

I guess it all depends on what kind of friendship you have. It is a big risk, but then again love itself is a risk.

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Ash Wednesday

Speak of the devil. I was going to the grocery store at noon hour today, and noticed my ex's vehicle was there in the parking lot. Assuming he was in the store, I opted to go to another store. ^_^

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