Jake Huether Posted September 9, 2003 Share Posted September 9, 2003 For instance... My brother having a baby! Oh what a wonderful occasion! But... How can we be happy knowing that it is happening so WRONG (outside of marriage). When he told my wife and I, we had to totally "fake" our happiness. I mean, in one part it is true - I am extremely happy to be able to have a new nephew to witness to. But then I know how he's gunna grow up! My bro and his girl are already having probs, in that they don't even live together (which is good for now, but a baby needs two married parents!). Another one... Just now, one of my co-workers, who I know is divorced, told me he was engaged. What could I do? I congradulated him. But it was fake - because inside I wanted to tell him he would be in grave error to "marry" another woman when he already has a wife (potentially in the eyes of God - who knows). And another co-worker will be having a "planned" baby (that's good) outside of marriage (that's bad). Uh, what are we to do!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted September 9, 2003 Share Posted September 9, 2003 Well, Jake, the way I see it, why act happy at all? I'm not saying act sad, though. But if you're faced with one of these occasions, it would probably speak volumes to act cool about it, like it's neither happy nor sad. But don't explain your lack of enthusiasm unless they ask you about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musturde Posted September 10, 2003 Share Posted September 10, 2003 Pray Pray Pray. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryanmeyersmusic Posted September 10, 2003 Share Posted September 10, 2003 babies don't happen wrong... i'm sure that God will use this to grace your brother with a better understanding of Himself... new life shouldn't be something you have to fake happy about... sorry, but this one hits pretty close to home as my family has had quite a similar situation lately (excluding the already having problems part) new life is always exciting and God's creation is always something to find joy in Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Huether Posted September 10, 2003 Author Share Posted September 10, 2003 babies don't happen wrong... i'm sure that God will use this to grace your brother with a better understanding of Himself... new life shouldn't be something you have to fake happy about... sorry, but this one hits pretty close to home as my family has had quite a similar situation lately (excluding the already having problems part) new life is always exciting and God's creation is always something to find joy in Sorry to offend. That didn't come out quite right I guess. As I said, I am extremely happy about the new life that was concieved. But I am extremely sad at the prospect of this baby's future. And the future of my brothers soul for that matter. You see, prior to knowing that my bro's girl was pregnant, it really hadn't hit me that he was sexuallly active OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE. So the news of her pregnancy touched a few different nerves for me. Oh, yes. No doubt babies don't happen wrong. That isn't what I meant. The Baby (a good thing) already happend. On the other hand, the planning of a family in the image of God CAN BE DONE wrong. A guy having sex with his unwed partner IS wrong. Sheesh! ryanmeyersmusic, you really painted me wrong. I never "faked" my happiness over the new life that is in my family. But I cannot seperate my feelings when everything hits me at once. Yes, I was happy about the baby. But I was utterly destroyed to learn that my bro is putting his imortal soul (as well as that of his girl and new child) in danger of DAMNATION. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 i know what you mean jake. i just found out the my younger cousin, whos only 15 (or 16) is going to have twins. she's due this april. it crushed me. this girl is not ready to have kids, and the dad is only 18 yrs old. my cousin needs prayers but i feel hopeless because i know that everything has that has happened is because of sin of pre-marital sex, etc. i'm however very happy to hear about the babies. im glad she chose life and i will support her.and my heart goes out to them and i know i already love my new little cousins. its good to tell them, congratulations! bad timing, but congratulations... prayer, i think is most essential. +JMJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 I kinda know how you feel. Example: Monday in the pediatricians office a woman in the lobby complimented Adrienne, and then told me she has 3 and is expecting her 4th. I congratulated her, and then she replied "Yeah, after this one I'm getting fixed." I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying 'Dontcha mean BROKEN???" <_< Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleflower+JMJ Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 oh yeah ice, thats what happen to one of my sisters friend, she already had two (or three) kids and on the last one she got her tubes tied. she's only 23. well, she met someone really special and now regrets that she will never be able to have anymore kids if she wanted to. but she knew what she was doing, my sister was the only one who told her not to....now she knows... :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryanmeyersmusic Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 i apologize jake, that was a totally inappropriate way of saying what i meant. i didn't mean to cause any hard feelings. i don't know the history of your family or anything like that, so it was completely wrong for me to fault you for your feelings. if you want my honest advise, though, the creation of life is one of the most powerful witnessing tools available to us. it's hard to deny a God when you witness His creation of a new soul and life. use that to win your brother for Christ. he'll thank you later ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmjtina Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 (edited) jake i agree Having a baby without the parents being married to each other, much less NOt loving each other is hard. Maybe because we see the whole picture. Maybe we know that the child will be neglected somehow. I have to smile, and "fake" my happiness to because this child deserves a loving home, with both mom and dad especially when you see the mother or father truly loving the child and they can't get the other parent to be involved. My friend who got her tubes tied, EVERYONE told her, "yeah, you should, kids are SO EXPENSIVE, you have to many kids already" blah blah blah all this trash. Telling her to save sex for marriage, don't tie your tubes, (You'll regret when you meet your future spouse) just went in one ear through the other. I don't have to tell her "I told you so" because she knows it already. All I can do is pray for her , more now (and countless of other women like her) because the pain of knowing she CAN'T have any more kids is inconsolable. I agree Ice. It is really "broken." As far as my 15 yr old cousin being pregnant, she didn't have a very good example to follow. Nowadays, kids think it's the norm. <_< Edited September 11, 2003 by jmjtina Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmjtina Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 if you want my honest advise, though, the creation of life is one of the most powerful witnessing tools available to us. it's hard to deny a God when you witness His creation of a new soul and life. use that to win your brother for Christ. he'll thank you later I see where your coming from, although I do disagree. The creation of life is a miracle, but it is being misused. God intended it to be in marriage and when you go about having children out of wedlock, you stray farther from God. How many children does it take to soften a hardened heart? Softening a hardened heart is God's business. Children bring joy to those who are ready and willing to recieve them. If your not ready and willing, it can make that hardened heart harder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 i just found out the my younger cousin, whos only 15 (or 16) is going to have twins. she's due this april. it crushed me. this girl is not ready to have kids, and the dad is only 18 yrs old. Have her parents filed a statutory rape charge, yet? You see, I'm from Nebraska, with is pretty conservative (okay, so it's the most conservative state in the union), so I'm not used to there being too many teenage pregnancies. I don't think, though, that I could congratulate it, though. Giving approval to a sin is, as I understand it, a sin in itself. Even if you don't really mean it, the person you're congratulating probably thinks you do. The really tough question is what to do about the baby shower...I mean, you don't want to reward the unwed mother, but you don't want to ignore the baby, who didn't do anything wrong...I would give the mother some diapers, so the baby gets something it needs, but she doesn't get something she wants. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Having a baby shower is NOT rewarding the mother, but providing for the child. Everybody sins. Some are public , some are not. God forgives sins, why can't we? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Have her parents filed a statutory rape charge, yet? Yes in Pa. it could be filed as well, if there is more than two years between the couples ages. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Having a baby shower is NOT rewarding the mother, but providing for the child. Everybody sins. Some are public , some are not. God forgives sins, why can't we? I agree, main point here is to provide for those innocent little babies. When my friends threw me a baby shower I didn't feel as if I were being rewarded or that it was for ME, I knew it was all for Adrienne. We received things we needed for her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now