Glimpses Into the Present (Thoughts on Experiences regarding Visitation)

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The numbers represents the Nun or Novice who wrote and share her experiences:

1. Coming from a large Filipino family and having most of my relatives in the Philippines, I was accustomed to having my parent’s house in NJ be the place to stay for a vacation to the United States. Whether I would be meeting my relatives for their first time here or would be seeing them again after years had passed, there was always an instant connection between us – a familiarity, a warmth, the same greeting with a kiss on the cheek – because well we knew we were family.

The canonical visitation reminded me of just that! Having nuns from different Carmels, Sr. Mary Elizabeth and Mother Celine, come into our enclosure and live our Carmelite way of life with us felt like having the other side of the family come and stay at our home. Throughout the week, we were able to hear and share stories, traditions, and customs of our own monasteries, and it became more apparent to me just how much of a family we are within the Order of Carmel. Simply having Sr. Mary Elizabeth and Mother Celine’s presence here opened me up to see a broader picture than our little enclosure, that we have other sisters throughout the US and the world experiencing similar joys as well as facing remarkably similar challenges as cloistered Carmelites. It is an encouragement to remind myself of this truth that we are not alone. We are not isolated. Together we can help each other as daughters of OHM to strengthen and upbuild one another in living out our vocation. In ways in line with our Constitutions, we can serve and be authentic witnesses to each other to live better the life OHM wanted all for the sake of our Lord and for His Church.

Now the Visitation would be missing something if it didn’t include the involvement of our Carmelite friars. Naturally, families are not complete without fathers and brothers! Having interviews with both Fr. Michael Berry and Sr. Mary Elizabeth provided safe spaces for me to share about my life in community with the sisters. Having someone from the outside who knows full well the life of a Carmelite put me at total ease to share my different experiences and even hopes for the future. They were spaces where I did not feel judged or scrutinized, but instead felt very listened to, understood, and cared for.

Lastly, having Fr. Michael give us the Sacrament of Holy Communion every day was a tangible reminder for me that we as brothers and sisters in Carmel are all one, and how pleasing it is to our Lord when we live in unity. In the daily Eucharist there was He who expressed His longing to gather us into Himself as One, who desires and delights when we greet each other with a familiarity, a warmth, a sincere “Praise be Jesus Christ,” because well after all we are one family in Christ Jesus.

2. My comments regarding our dear President's "Sisterly Visits" is that they were life-giving, encouraging and tremendously freeing! We all felt we were listened to and heard, and Sister Mary Elizabeth's humility and generosity helped us to see ways out of our problems and gave us the courage to follow them. Her support in our trial was and is invaluable. We are a new Community

3. Reflection on our Canonical Visitation

There is no doubt that when Cor Orans was promulgated in 2018 “shock waves” went through my mind, especially what was mandated concerning the Coordinator/President of the Association serving in the capacity as Co-Visitator alongside the Bishop! I had to struggle with this idea (a thick black cloud looming on the horizon indeed!) which seemed very contrary to our Teresian charism. After all, where do we find in the writings or the example of our Holy Mother that she set herself up as some kind of “Mother General” to make visitations, or appointed another nun to look into the doings of another Carmel? This was not her idea of government for the Carmels of the Reform.

For sure, as an Association, we were standing on “new territory” which seemed to me very much like “shaky ground”! Two things came to my rescue and put my mind at peace: first of all, the two letters of our Fr. General on the new Instruction, Cor Orans. He makes it abundantly clear that, while the President of a Federation or Association has no juridical authority over the member Monasteries, the Holy See has entrusted to her certain responsibilities; among those responsibilities is her participation as CoVisitator in the Canonical Visitation. Our higher superiors in the Church are saying to us: Do this, it is for your good! It was a clear call to obedience.

Then secondly, our Fr. General’s letters sent me straight back to our Holy Mother! Chapter 5 of her book of Foundations was, to me, the real “life boat”, and completely banished the last shreds of opposition in my mind. The “bottom line” of our Holy Mother in the Foundations chapter 5 is: if obedience and charity call you out of your solitude and away from prayer, then accept it as the Lord’s will for you; you will not lose anything in terms of graces or a lessening of your spiritual life. On the contrary, you will gain! Our Holy Mother leaves no wiggle room in the matter! Upon reflecting on this chapter a little bit, it became obvious to me that what our highest superiors in the Church have given to us in Cor Orans is ultimately for our good, to strengthen and build up our Teresian charism, not tear it down.

The Church also expected contemplative nuns to implement the norms of Cor Orans according to their respective charisms; this is repeated again and again in the document. Of course, such implementation calls for careful and prayerful discernment. This necessitated a very careful reading of both the Instruction and the charismatic elements found in the writings and example of our Holy Mother, as well as in Carmelite tradition. Our Association Statutes bear the happy results! There is great peace and confident assurance moving forward, especially with a Canonical Visitation. The other Sisters in our Community felt the same.

4. Last Fall, at the end of October into early November, our Community had the joy of our first Visitation according to the new norms of the Church. The Coordinator (President) of our Association, Sr. Mary Elizabeth from Des Plaines, and our Association Treasurer, Sr. John from Loretto arrived with the enthusiastic welcome of our Community! What was particularly beautiful was that they came not only to be Visitators along with our Bishop for the two days of the Visitation, but they stayed with us for several days as our cherished Sisters so they could live with us, pray with us, and see firsthand, what life was like in our Community. This “inside view” of a Carmel is really a major part of the Visitation.

Each Sister was individually and separately interviewed by the Bishop, and then by the Coordinator. As expected, the Sisters spoke more extensively with the nun-Visitator, than with the Bishop. The atmosphere was peaceful and open-hearted among all. What I found particularly helpful was the sisterly love and objectivity with which our Community difficulties were treated—which Monastery doesn’t have difficulties?! Yes, we have elderly Sisters who are loved and cherished, as well as infirmities, and we do not have a large contingent of youngsters entering—though we have been blessed with a few new vocations. During the Visitation, the strong points of our Community have been highlighted: the united spirit in Community, openness and cooperation among ourselves (which we continue to work on), the desire to be faithful to the Church and our Holy Mother’s vision of Carmel, communion with the other members of the Order, good government within the Community and a close relationship with our Bishop, careful financial management, and the cultivation of good, well-rounded formation for those in formation. The encouragement of these points gave us renewed strength to continue cultivating, with the Lord’s grace, the “good soil” of our Community, so as to have a fruitful future!

Lastly, our Bishop was also very pleased with how the Visitation proceeded. He was also unsure how this “new manner” of conducting a Canonical Visitation would work out. He later wrote to our Mother: “I was most edified by the program and response of the Sisters to the Canonical Visitation, and the manner in which it was conducted by the Co-Visitator, Sister Mary Elizabeth of the Trinity, OCD, and Coordinator of St. Joseph’s Association, assisted by Sister John of the Cross, Association Treasurer. For me personally, it was an uplifting and prayerful experience, confirming once again how blessed we are to have your Community present in our Diocese.”

Our Canonical Visitation took place at the end of October 2020. I found it to be very inspiring because of the sisterly way it was conducted and the spirit of family that was so profoundly felt. Sr. Mary Elizabeth gave of her time so freely and was so available for us. There was a spirit of peace present and mutual love. I found it helpful that the Sisters could come inside the enclosure and speak with us so informally. It helped create a relaxed and peaceful atmosphere.

5. Several years ago, I had the opportunity to go to a meeting of our Nuns. Encountering Sisters from other Carmels turned out to be such a special experience, linking us even more closely together. The only thing I can compare it to is the joy and fellowship I imagine we will have in heaven. Ever since that event, I experience visits of individual Sisters to our monastery in the same way, and this includes the sisterly visit from our Coordinator: it is not only a time of enrichment and the sharing of new insights, but a joyful event with lots of laughs! The coordinator's intention is not to control (neither is it the Church's intention), but to bring out in us our fullest potential and help lead us to a deeper union with God.

What stood out most to me during our coordinator's visit was how she accepted the way we did things here. I know for certain that her community's customs differed from ours, but she gave absolutely no indication that she disapproved. She knew we had reasons for doing what we were doing, and she jumped right into it as though she were a part of our community, ready to do God's will with enthusiasm.

6. The thought of having a "foreign" person come in to visit us, and live among us, was a little scary. We didn't know what to expect. But when Sister Mary Elizabeth arrived, we could see within a short time that it really wasn't a "foreign" person visiting us, but our very own sister in Carmel, who worked and recreated side by side with us. It was as if she wasn't visiting at all, but had always been with us. We were sad to see her go.

7. Sister Mary Elizabeth's visit to our monastery left with me these reflections:

She was astute and aware of the needs of Carmel today.

She was very real, down to earth in a humble, Carmelite way.

Very loving in the short visit we had with her. She made an impression.

She can see other peoples' points of view - she wasn't rigid.

She was lively, and a whole lot of fun!

She was very interested in our Carmel.

She took a lot of pictures.

Even our clothes lines fascinated her - that we could still hang laundry outside in December!

She was an energetic worker - how efficiently she got those dishes done!

She was very obedient - she ate everything that Reverend Mother gave her.

She was charitable to all.

8. The Visitation definitely filled me with an encouraging sense of unity with the Order and within our Association. Having the visiting nuns live within the community and share our spirit so naturally was truly heart-warming – a real ferverino!

9. The Visitation with Sr. Mary Elizabeth was a time of real graces. Even before she arrived, she helped us by sending a series of questionnaires which we could use or not during the interviews as we wanted. The questions were excellent and made us reflect on our life and our vocation beyond our usual way of thinking. She had some suggestions about a certain situation which were very good and which we believed we should follow, though not right away. When we explained the reason for our delay she was very understanding.

10. My experience of the visitation according to the new legislation is that it all went very well. The entire visit went smooth. I cherished the time with the visitating Sisters and got to know them as 'my Sisters" and not just as "Authority Sisters'. A visitation with Sisters and not just a Bishop was very much needed! Also I'm happy to report that there were no unexpected surprises because there was openness and honesty on both sides!

11. I really enjoyed getting to know two of our Sisters in the Association. It was as if they were just distant family members who came to see us. I didn't feel threatened or uncomfortable throughout the visitation. I really felt the Sisters were here to help us and not to spy on us. I think one thing that would help the President of the Association is to shorten the questions or have less papers.

12. We see the wisdom of the Church in sending a Sister to be Co-Visitor with the Bishop, we therefore welcomed those who live our vocation and understand the "inner workings" of a Carmel. It was a joy and a grace to be together for those days! Lastly, I would say, we have nothing to hide so there was nothing to fear in having our President and accompanying Sister come to spend these days with us.

13. It was refreshing to get to know other Carmelites!

14. Our Lord’s Prayer at the Last Supper “That they may be one” was most happily fulfilled during those graced days of the visitation! The Cor orans directives, accepted in Faith, were more than I could have hoped for in this experience. Indeed, it was fruitful on every level and surely pleasing to OHM.

15. I loved the visitation, to me it shows Mother Church does not forget her children she goes out to them and cares for their needs, listens to their stories and binds up what needs it. All 3 visitators were very attentive and compassionate, having previous/current leadership experience they were able to assess our situation from various angles. I felt I was able to speak freely without judgment on their part. It felt like the nuns were a part of our community especially when they joined us at the office and prayer. It was fun to learn about the similarities and differences in the way traditions have been passed down to our Carmels. I also enjoyed hearing about their community life and struggles and opinions. For me this was truly a learning experience and a time of sisterly camaraderie. Lastly, Father Michael seemed very interested was an excellent empathic listener, what a fatherly figure…

16. Our monastery Visitation with Fr. Michael Berry, Mother Celine and Sister Mary Elizabeth was a wonderful and grace-filled experience.

Father Michael was very open and caring about our situation at present and he had very helpful advice. He gave every Sister all the time needed for sharing our life with him.

It was a blessing of heavenly graces to have our 2 Sisters with us for the Visitation. Mother Celine and Sister Mary Elizabeth just blended into our Community from the moment we all met. It was a joy to have both of them with us for those special days. From the moment we met, it was as if we knew one another forever, and they blended into our Carmelite lives as if we were always together. It was easy to share everything with both of them because there [sic] hearts were open to hear what we had to say and to give us the advice we needed. The whole experience was one that O.H.M. would be proud of as it was a true, Sisterly Visitation according to Our Holy Mother’s Heart! We were sad to see them leave!