SANTA FE (CARMEL) TRAIL: THE RAGGED JOURNEY TO AFFILIATION

[graciandelamadrededios]

Earlier this year we were requested to do an interview for Amigas, but we had to decline because we were preparing for our first Visitation after the reception of our Decree for affiliation towards rejuvenation. Since that time, we have learned of several other Carmels in our country that similarly had to face the prospect of affiliation. We tell you from experience: it is a long, painful Night. We have been a bit toughened by the process and shaped by the years that brought us to this state, and as such we do not think of ourselves as a sugar-and-lace Carmel, but rather as weathered, tried and humbled by circumstances. So instead of a “regular” interview, we humbly offer a small portion of our story here in the hope that it will help other Carmels and strengthen our Association. We pray that you will learn from our openness and not just judge our witness as disgraceful colloquy. Let it be known from the beginning that we love and respect our Sisters who went before us - they laid a strong foundation in the Carmelite spirit and left us their legacy and the fruit of their hard work. We are able to undergo this affiliation experiment because of their goodness.

 

We want to share just a note about our founding because issues from the early days are impacting our efforts 76 years later. Briefly then: at the invitation of Archbishop Edwin Byrne, Mother Mary Teresa and five Carmelites from Dallas arrived in Santa Fe in late October 1945. In April of the following year, Archbishop Byrne acquired the Santa Fe Inn (formerly Sunmount Sanitorium for tuberculosis treatment). Situated on a dirt road on the east side of Santa Fe at the foot of the Sangre de Cristo Mountains, it was a perfect setting for a monastery. Archbishop Byrne desired to make Mount Carmel Road the spiritual center of the Archdiocese. He divided the land and buildings, deeded some of it to the nuns, and then established the diocesan seminary on the other side of the monastery wall. However, to this day, we are plagued by the peculiarly worded deeds.

 

Our Community participated fully in the Golden Years of religious life – the 50’s and 60’s when vocations were abundant. We made two foundations during that time. But we suffered greatly, like many others, during the difficult years after the Council. We did seem to find a good balance, but the 70’s left several of our nuns wounded, fearful and hypervigilant for any possible challenge to unity. As early as the mid-90’s, shy voices dared to raise the issue of the Community being on a slippery slope, but they were immediately hushed and disciplined by the sub-prioress. Silence and denial ruled the day.

 

In the years leading up to the promulgation of Vultum Dei quaerere, our Carmel had all of the problems that Rome would discover from the Congregation’s questionnaire sent to women’s monasteries in 2014. The litany went like this: aging religious and few vocations; poor vocational discernment; inadequate formation, both initial and ongoing (particularly in human growth and development); higher standards for postulants and novices than for professed; no plan or preparation for a generational transfer of governance; strained relationships; isolation; and paralyzing health crises – both physical and mental in nature.

 

Deteriorating health eventually forced some guarded discussion. As an example – not an everyday occurrence but not entirely unique either – there was a day in May of 2006 when our small Community of nine had one in the hospital rehab department, one in surgery, one in the ER all day who was eventually admitted, one at home waiting for the hospice nurse to come, another bedridden with back spasms and crippling osteoarthritis, and a nun hiding in her cell, emotionally broken and unable to face the complexities of the day. Compline that night and the five following was one choir nun, a postulant, and an extern. All three Sisters were later discharged from the hospital within 36 hours of one another; all needed assistance. We were strict on interpreting enclosure, so no one was allowed in to help. For the healthy ones, years of frustration and exhaustion ensued.

 

Women would come, but not stay because they experienced formation as unorganized, antiquated, vague and yet harsh. In the late 90’s the novitiate building was overflowing, but in 2004 it was empty after only one profession. Similarly, in 2011 five women came and not one was with us for Christmas. In December our postulant also departed. And yet, the Chapter was not concerned. Health problems among the professed increased beyond broken hips to cancer, dementia, and mental health issues as well. With functioning at an all-time low, our prioress called on the extern Sisters for greater participation in meeting the daily needs of running the monastery. Unknown to all but two, change was in the air because Rome had notified our bishop and prioress that she would not be postulated again, and the Community would need to elect someone new in 2013.

 

At this point we temper what we say because in 2013 we stepped into a nightmare which still gives us chills. There was absolutely, truly, no one suitable for the office of prioress, and by now, not even anyone capable of being a fully functioning Council member - including our dear out-going prioress who was experiencing cognitive and short-term memory loss. Nevertheless, she was elected sub-prioress (As you know, that is not supposed to happen). That year right around the election, we received two very young postulants who, by grace abounding, were able to weather the storms of ever-increasing dysfunction and trauma. With the growing issues of incapacity, the externs were “allowed” to assume the task of formation and took the young Sisters under their wings. Operating for the next two years in total survival mode, with no one on the outside knowing what was going on, the Community had begun to breech articles of the Constitutions and eventually of Canon law. During the Year of Consecrated Life and the 5ooth Anniversary of Our Holy Mother’s birth, there was little celebration as we were morphing into two camps: the five incapacitated Chapter nuns as one, and the two externs and two novices as the other. The stress was incredible. It was getting scary.

 

We look back on the year 2016 as pivotal because we began to see, in the midst of accelerating chaos, the hand of Divine Providence at work. It began with materials coming in February from the closing of the Year of Consecrated Life when Father General Saverio proposed an on-going formation program. Mother Therese from the Association began sending all kinds of materials, including findings from the Congregation which we mentioned earlier. The Chapter was quite mistrustful, but the rest of us became voracious readers of anything coming from Archbishop Carballo, Father General, Father Rafal Wilkowski and Father Daniel Chowning. We began to feel like we were getting our bearings straight and had a sneak preview into the potentialities of the future.

 

Just before the scheduled elections of May of 2016, one of the younger Chapter nuns was diagnosed with terminal cancer. We felt so defeated; some of us began to talk about exclaustration or just walking out because we could not bear the thought of going through this with all the current governance about to be re-elected. The night before the election, our frail and fragile former prioress – in an act of heroic virtue – called our recently installed Archbishop and told him we were in trouble and needed help. She was trembling the whole time because she knew that the prioress would see it as an act of disobedience and betrayal. But she also knew that her beloved Carmel would not survive the earthquake of anyone leaving. Archbishop John Wester arrived in the morning and told the Community that he was going to delay the election until he got to know us and was more familiar with his role in our regard. He then began a series of visits to the monastery and, as we later learned, reached out to several of his friends and to the Congregation for guidance. His participation was seen by some of us as a lifeline of hope, by others as illegal interference. In the meantime, Vultum Dei quaerere arrived.

 

We were surprised when the prioress asked the externs to represent the Community at the assembly in St. Louis in 2017. As it turned out, there was a profound purpose in the plan of God for us attending! At the first conference we sat next to Sr. Nancy Reynolds, a Sister of Providence, not a Carmelite. We asked what she was doing here with all these Carmelites, and we learned that she was a canon lawyer appointed by Rome as prioress of the Louisville Carmel as it was closing. We had been told to not talk to the Friars, but nothing was said about a canonist! We met and talked over lunch, and we saw the many possibilities open to us - she proved we had already lost autonomy and that it would get worse before it got better - and we were determined from that moment to faithfully tread the uncharted path that God alone was designing for us. Among the years of struggle behind us and the many yet to come, that meeting with Sr. Nancy stands as the most important hour because it changed our perspective on everything. Much to our surprise, she knew our Archbishop since they had worked together in the chancery in San Francisco. She promised to call him and help him understand both his responsibilities and his limitations according to the law. We were anxious for Cor Orans to come so that we would know the rules and, as Our Holy Mother would say, know how to set the game.

 

Six weeks after St. Louis, our prioress received the news that her cancer had returned, and she would require chemotherapy again. No attempt was made to cover major offices and there effectively was no Council. Archbishop Wester and Sr. Nancy came to our Carmel in early July. The gentle version of the story is that he relieved our prioress of her duties so that she could focus on her health. He asked the externs if they would be willing to assume governance. Like lambs to the slaughter, we said yes. He mandated building out an appropriate infirmary; getting the two young Sisters out of health care by hiring help; and restoration of the full monastic schedule. Rome soon approved the whole process. The reaction and behaviors of a couple of the nuns was beyond description. Our longtime friend, Fr. John Mary O. Carm., provided spiritual support for the Sisters struggling with the changes. We began a campaign of cleaning up and cleaning out because closure seemed a surety. Our Holy Mother received a vision of hell from God, but for us, God insisted that we walk through it for a year. We can’t even bring ourselves to talk about it

 

In August of 2018 we externs were admitted to solemn profession and Rome eventually appointed us (Sister Marie Bernadette and Sister Marie Anthony) as prioress and vicar. Our Sister who had been diagnosed with cancer in 2016 died in November. A few weeks later in January of 2019 our beloved prioress of fifty years, Mother Rose, died. The following month our last founding Sister, Therese, also died. In May one of the Chapter nuns began the process of medical exclaustration. In July our now former prioress received her third diagnosis of cancer, this time terminal. In January of 2020 she passed away. In fourteen months, we had lost all five Chapter nuns.

 

Our decision about affiliation was not quick and easy. The four of us had the huge advantage of having a well-informed supportive committee already in place: Archbishop Wester, Sr. Nancy, Fr. John Mary, and Sr. Mary Elizabeth from the Association. We had embraced a high standard of transparency and openness, and as such, even though we had received a scolding from Rome, we never received a “no.” We were blessed to be without financial difficulties. But we were tired, bruised and war weary. We thought a decision might be made at the Visitation scheduled for January, but it was postponed because of a death.

 

We had begun discernment in October 2019 and made it a priority to study together Vultum Dei quaerere, The Way of Perfection, and Fr. Chowning’s paper A Plan of Community Life. God had been so present to us the previous three years that we knew He would show us His will, and whether it be toward rejuvenation or closure, we knew there would be trials, but we would be fine. In February of 2020 we were still split on which course to take, so we set aside several days for intensive and prolonged discernment together. The breakthrough can be described in Our Holy Mother’s words: I am a daughter of the Church…

 

Our Archdiocese has struggled under the burden of the clergy sex abuse scandals since 1993. Under profound pain and anger, and the spotlight of national and international news media, our local Church has been on the verge of collapse for years. All Catholics here are suffering. We are approaching the fourth year of being in bankruptcy with no resolution and millions having been spent on the legal process. We could see parallels between the threatened Church of St. Teresa’s time and our own local Church now. We remembered the mission given us when Archbishop Byrne brought us to New Mexico: to pray for the seminarians, and by our sacrifice and prayer, to spiritually nurture the people and clergy of the Archdiocese. It was clear to us that our mission was not over – indeed it was never so necessary as now - and we needed to do all we could to remain to fulfil it. We submitted our detailed request for affiliation to rejuvenation to Sr. Mary Elizabeth as President of the Association, who submitted it and further paperwork to Rome. The Congregation sent the DECREE of acceptance in October 2020, just before our 75th Anniversary.

 

We have been affiliated barely a year and can report that it has not been at all the negative experience our imaginations concocted. Sr. Mary Elizabeth is our prioress to whom we turn for only major issues, and to whom we remain open and respectful. Otherwise, on a day-to-day basis, you would not notice that our status has changed. God is blessing us with vocations as we are now six in number. We know that we still have a long journey ahead - probably twelve to fifteen years – to return to autonomy, and that circumstances could nevertheless push us to closure. Our greatest concern now is that the Archdiocese is forced by the bankruptcy court to sell the adjoining property that was the seminary, and the new owners may not be suitable to our vocation. We have drawn ever closer to Our Holy Mother, and she sometimes hints that she is walking our halls, whispering, “What shall you be – hens or eagles?”

[BarbTherese]

Thank you very much for this personal contribution to Carmel's journey in history.;  Much appreciated @graciandelamadrededios.

God bless.............Barb

[graciandelamadrededios]

3 hours ago, BarbTherese said:

Thank you very much for this personal contribution to Carmel's journey in history.;  Much appreciated @graciandelamadrededios.

God bless.............Barb

YW, dear!

I found their story online and just posted them here.